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ok - having just gone through a similar situation......
is there any chance of just refinancing your house??? - lower interest rate, for a new 30 year term and cash out some of that equity.....we did that - it helped a lot.
we found a daycare that lets us do a couple days a week, as needed - mostly for me to do my consulting. baby's not in daycare full time and you can still make up that income you need.
i put family first - you may be poor now - but you can catch up later. if you can pay the bills and live comfortably, do it - they're only little once.
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 i have become comfortably numb......
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