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View Full Version : Man admits having sex with 1,000 cars



renovation
05-22-2008, 03:28 PM
Edward Smith, who lives with his current "girlfriend" – a white Volkswagen Beetle named Vanilla, insisted that he was not "sick" and had no desire to change his ways.

"I appreciate beauty and I go a little bit beyond appreciating the beauty of a car only to the point of what I feel is an expression of love," he said.

"Maybe I'm a little bit off the wall but when I see movies like Herbie and Knight Rider, where cars become loveable, huggable characters it's just wonderful.
"I'm a romantic. I write poetry about cars, I sing to them and talk to them just like a girlfriend. I know what's in my heart and I have no desire to change."

He added: "I'm not sick and I don't want to hurt anyone, cars are just my preference."

Mr Smith, 57, first had sex with a car at the age of 15, and claims he has never been attracted to women or men.

But his wandering eye has spread beyond cars to other vehicles. He says that his most intense sexual experience was "making love" to the helicopter from 1980s TV hit Airwolf.

As well as Vanilla, he regularly spends time with his other vehicles – a 1973 Opal GT, named Cinnamon, and 1993 Ford Ranger Splash, named Ginger.

Before Vanilla, he had a five-year relationship with Victoria, a 1969 VW Beetle he bought from a family of Jehovah's Witnesses.

But he confesses that many of the cars he has had sex with have belonged to strangers or car showrooms.

His last relationship with a woman was 12 years ago - and he could not bring himself to consummate it, although he did have sex with girls in his younger days.

Mr Smith, from Washington state in the US, kept quiet about his secret fetish for years, but agreed to be interviewed as part of a channel Five documentary into “mechaphilia”. He is shown meeting other enthusiasts at a rally in California

Talking about how his unusual passion developed, Mr Smith said: "It's something that grew as a part of me when I was a kid and I could not shake it.

"I just loved cute cars right from the beginning, but over the years it got stronger once I got into my teenage years and was my first having sexual urges.

"When I turned 13 and the famous Corvette Stingray came about, that car was pure sex and just an incredible machine. I wanted it.

"I didn't fully understand it myself except that I know I'm not hurting anyone and I do not intend to."

He added: "There are moments way out in the middle of nowhere when I see a little car parked and I swear it needs loving.

"There have been certain cars that attracted me and I would wait until night time, creep up to them and just hug and kiss them.

"As far as women go, they never really interested me much. And I'm not gay.”

Mr Smith is now part of a global community of more than 500 “car lovers” brought together by internet forums.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/telegraph/multimedia/archive/00672/car404_672768c.jpg
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/2000899/Man-admits-%27having-sex%27-with-1,000-cars.html


were is DR Auto .PHD. of philology this guy is in need of your professional help :eye:

i wonder if his cars run and get better MPG with his personal additives:duh: .

uncledaddy
05-22-2008, 08:43 PM
Nasty! :puke:

Thesifer
05-22-2008, 09:28 PM
I don't really want to ask.. but I just don't get it. I mean does he use the tailpipe or the gastank or is it all purely imagination or what? maybe I don't want to know.

Daedalus
05-22-2008, 11:07 PM
And I thought I was a "car guy." I can't believe there's some guy running around who can actually say "I doinked Airwolf."

mojo
05-22-2008, 11:20 PM
what's he use for protection, simonize or turtle wax? :hmm:

DarkFury
05-23-2008, 06:49 AM
I hear an R. Kelly song coming on...

<R. Kelly>

You remind me of my Jeep... You remind me of my car...

</ R. Kelly>

Prngr44
05-23-2008, 11:33 AM
Extremely bizarre.

The Happy Squirrel
05-23-2008, 11:58 AM
I don't really want to ask.. but I just don't get it. I mean does he use the tailpipe or the gastank or is it all purely imagination or what? maybe I don't want to know.


i was wondering the same thing but not sure i would like to know

Prngr44
05-23-2008, 12:33 PM
I wonder if he gets up on the windshield and sprays washer fluid all over himself.

:hihi:

Thesifer
05-23-2008, 01:12 PM
I wonder if he gets up on the windshield and sprays washer fluid all over himself.

:hihi:

Or all over the window.. :gle:

lindysd
05-23-2008, 04:30 PM
"...part of a global community of more than 500 “car lovers” brought together by internet forums. "

How does one start that thread? An entire community of "car lovers"? What the .....!

DarkFury
05-23-2008, 06:41 PM
I don't really want to ask.. but I just don't get it. I mean does he use the tailpipe or the gastank or is it all purely imagination or what? maybe I don't want to know.
Whichever the case, I'm sure that there are some "non OEM approved additives" going somewhere... :puke:


Seriously, there are some wacked out people out there... I just better not catch this mofo huggin' up my car in the parking lot of Wal Mart or something. :2far:

Markel
05-23-2008, 08:24 PM
I guess this site (http://www.ihumpedyourhummer.com) doesn't really qualify in the same way....

nate el bueno
05-30-2008, 02:51 PM
I guess this site (http://www.ihumpedyourhummer.com) doesn't really qualify in the same way....

glad to know my dad finds these sites in his spare time:eek2:

ShawnLee
05-30-2008, 08:14 PM
Welcome to the wonderful world of the internet, Nate.

Markel
05-30-2008, 08:44 PM
I forgot where I saw that site linked (maybe on some blog), but this thread made me think about it (and the name "I humped your Hummer" is pretty easy to remember).

DarkFury
05-31-2008, 12:20 AM
Welcome to the wonderful world of the internet, Nate.
I've always found some of the stuff your Dad says here as "suspect"... This revelation is just evidence for the future trial in the public opinon. :D