oooooooo!.... heres an update...

[Nanotech9]

ok, so tonight we all had a "house warming" get-together at my friend Heather's house. (she moved in about a month ago remember?). Anyways, most everyone brought a little gift. So, after its all over, ppl are leaving, and she's hugging the girls and thanking them for the gifts, and giving the guys that "half hug" (you know the stand beside the guy and put your arm around his shoulders kida hug that some girls do - its a casual "thank-you" hug).... anyways, so im like the last one out and she *ALMOST* gives me a hug too. (kinda leaned towards me, but was kinda deciding weather or not she should).

So heres my theory... if she had no "feelings" for me, i would have gotten the "half-hug" like everyone else, BUT, since she does have something going on for me, she thought it I might think she was being too forward, or was waiting to see if i was gonna do the hug thing too, or keep my distance... Also, i may not have gotten the hug, since there were still people just outside the door, and since we've been hangin' together so much, she didnt want to start rumors by giving me a hug. (Believe me, rumors start WAY too easily around here!)

Now, the actual hug ain't no big deal... its the thought process thats behind NOT getting the hug that i'm wondering about...

so, is this a good thing, or a bad thing? (remember, she's a fairly "conservative" girl)

[Markel]

Originally posted by Nanotech9
So heres my theory... if she had no "feelings" for me, i would have gotten the "half-hug" like everyone else
Of course, if the feelings she has toward you are the negative kind, this could also explain the "no hug". :rolleyes: However, I suspect that it is more as you suspect. :)

[Anck Su Namun]

whoa i thought only girls analyze stuff to death :heh:

[StonedWheat]

Sounds like your being too hopeful there. Of course I could be wrong. You are definitely over-analyzing this thing. So someone dosen't give you a hug, and you think that she might have feelings for you because she's worried about what other people might think? That makes no sense to me. Sorry guy.

[Markel]

Originally posted by nefertiti
whoa i thought only girls analyze stuff to death :heh:
You have to remember, this is NANOTECH! :heh:

[Nanotech9]

well stoned, you have to understand the history on this gal... see, for the last few months, i've been taking here to a movie and dinnr, just about every weekend, as "Friends".... never has teh word "date" or "bf/gf" been mentioned... maybe its even been avoided.

thats why i felt compelled to over-analyze the situation... I'm trying to get into her brain right now to figure out why she did what she did.

heres my next plan. I have a really good (girl) friend in colorado that i call about once a month or so... shes also friends w/ Heather, and i explained the whole "going out but not dating" thing to her. She understands why i havent actually turned it into "dates" yet. After all, its the same reason she wouldnt date me.

ok, so my idea is to get K. (the gal in colorad) to call Heather (they are friends too) and mention that i had mentioned to K. that we hang out all the time, and then ask Heather if shes interested in me etc.. (you know - girl talk stuff). Now, i have a legit reason to do this... (otherwise i would just ask Heather myself).

We have a friendship going on (me an heather) that is somewhat of a delicate situation... you see, my older brother tried to "date" her a year or so ago. He never did really do a good job of dating her tho. He's married now though. Also, I dont want to get "involved" right now, and im thinking she doesnt either, but maybe i Should get involved. If i'm right, (that she like JUST being friends) and ask her if she wants to start "dating" i could damage the friendship. If i'm wrong, and she DOES want to call it dating, then I'm in a bind, cause i still dont want to be involved w/ anyone right now, BUT i know thats selfish of me...

anyhoo...

Yay, i just smoked all the gals in over-anaylising stuff. If theres a gal out there that can beat that, i want to here it! :heh:

[Nanotech9]

see, everything would just be really simple if Karis (in colorado) would just give in and go out w/ me... Geez, were past the communication barriers state, and we (most of the time) get along really well, her parents love me (i call them Mom and Dad [lastname]) and i call her Grandparents Grandpa and Grandma. Oh, and she loves riding on the cycle w/ me, and just Daaaaayum georgeous (i think so at least). But alas, she wont go out w/ poor little ole' Nano... :sad:

[g222leav]

as far as teh hug is concerned...B.O.??????

j/k

but, you probably are over-analyzing. in my travels, i've noticed that guys tend to mis-interpret girls actions into thinking something is there when it's not. also girls tend to send out mix-messages all the time, so it's not always the guys fault. either way, just get some major cahones and ask her out already! it'll break down that unspoken barrier, and clear the air. and if you're both mature enough, then every thing should be all good.

[welfareloser]

notice only the guys are telling you this is over-analyzing?

i think you're absolutely right. and getting another girl to weasel some info out of her is exactly what i'd do (keeping in mind that there is a good chance that your double-agent will spill more of your beans than she is authorized to do... but that's not a bad thing!)

[Nanotech9]

hehe, well, my doubble-agent is pretty special. If she says she won't say such-n-such, she wont. (i think :))

heres the thing - if i bring this up (i.e. actually ask her out) then if she says no then we wont be able to hange out w/ each other like we used to (it would be awkard and uncomfortable).

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh! My freekin head! I'm going crazy! http://nanotech9.dhs.org:1088/smilies/rockon-spike.gif

[LPMiller]

how your head hasn't managed to explode into a million over wrought shards is beyond me.


But I'd go with the weasel plan too. I just would have used a lot less thought process to get there. But then, I'm italian, I'm always looking for a snitch.

[ArkiStan]

dude!! You've been going out to movies and dinner almost every weekend for the last few months and she was reluctant to give you one little HUG?? I don't know much, but I can tell you this, brotha... there is SOMETHING going on!! If a comfortable "friendship" relationship is what she truly wanted then there would be ABSOLUTELY no problem with exchanging a little hug, no matter how conservative she was. She likes you dude. Trust me. If she really wanted a "friendship" she would have been more cautious of not letting you fall into such assumptions that she might like you. She would have refrained from going out with you so often to maintain that "friendship" atmosphere. That's how over-analystic girls are. She wants you to know that she likes you, and she's showing it in many ways here, buddy. Go for it. It doesn't matter which weasel you resort to using first. This one's YOURS.

good luck.

[mojo]

who were you trying to kid here? i read somewhere that you "didn't want to get involved"? dude, you want her bad. you want her like nobody's business. that is why you're acting like this. admitting it will be the first step.

i'd also forget your little scheme of "mr sneakyman" there. then again, that is just me. i have my ways of doing this, and that ain't it. if you think it will help ease the pressure, then do it. the way i see it, it's time for the ol' hug there. i mean, you want her and all...so what's the dillio? you want her, she wants you (you pretty much know this, and you just want to hear it from us). either that or you're misreading it and not telling us something, and still want to hear it from us so that you have backup in the event you're wrong. in other words...you already know something that you're not telling us. you know she wants you, or you know she doesn't. just do the right thing and be happy knowing that you gave it the ol' "college try"

[Nanotech9]

"you want her bad" heheheheh.... mmmmkay. I like her, but I do have some reservations...

maybe its ME problem... I dont want to get involved, but then again, maybe i should cause i like her... i donno.

See, i do this w/ every gal i like. Except none of them ever even remotely "liked" me back. I mean, my friend in colorado likes me and all, but she never "Liked" me in the other sense of the word... Never before have i ever neede to worry about my likeing someone actually "working out" and the other person likeing me back.

and get this, (for those who already think im in a good spot) she was the one that originally started the weekly get-together thing... she used to call ME up every week to do something... and that turned into me asking her every week...

ohhhh geez. I'm a mental wreck! I think i have fear of a serious relationship cause those lead to marriage, which is fine, but not fine right now... darnit, i need a good job and an education before i get hitched. and a house. and blah blah blah... etc.

AAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!... i hate it. I do this every damn time.

ok, back to the hug thing... see, rumors have already started, just a little. A FEW people know we hang out all the time. My brother, his wife, my brothers old roommate, Heathers roommate (which is her sister's sister-in-law), and maybe 1 or two other people. Well, anytime theres a rumor about someone, and then someone else sees them even "half-hug", the whole place (i.e. everyone at church) just magically knows about it, and it turns into the latest rumor that so-and-so is goign out with so-and-so blah blah blah... soooo, maybe Heather was trying to avoid starting a bigger rumor, and being nice to me.

dont get me wrong here - this only takes my brain about 15 secs to process... its not like i go around all day thinking about it, like girls doo...

But, I have another plan! Heather wasnt in church today, and she said she was maybe getting sick lastnight, so i'm gonna call and see if she's ok! Mwahahahaha am i an evil scheemer(sp?) or what? Maybe i'll send some "get well" flowers too! http://nanotech9.dhs.org:1088/smilies/mwah.gif

[Nanotech9]

do i have issues?

[Sir_Froggy]

Originally posted by Markel

You have to remember, this is NANOTECH! :heh:

haha lol :heh:
u guys are so funny

[Sir_Froggy]

Originally posted by Nanotech9
Mwahahahaha am i an evil scheemer(sp?) or what? http://nanotech9.dhs.org:1088/smilies/mwah.gif

it's spelled schemer i think
cuz the base word is 'scheme' so i think schemer
yep *nods head*


and wow! :Wow: wut a kool face! u shuld use that one Leon that'd be grate! heh sorta like cheese u grate it :P ahhahah man i crack myself up :P

[mojo]

Originally posted by Nanotech9
"you want her bad" heheheheh.... mmmmkay. I like her, but I do have some reservations...


if you don't like her, then why are we having this conversation :|

[Jeffbx]

Dude, why don't you just come out & ask her? Then your head probably won't explode while you're analyzing it to death.

[Nanotech9]

w00t w00t! I was RIGHT! I called her up and sure enuf she was sick..

I offered to get here anything if she needed it etc... Oooo, I'm sooo thoughtfull!!!

2 points for Nano! :D

[Nanotech9]

HELP LADIES! whats a good flower "get well" arrangement under $20? (heh, I'm cheap)

[Nanotech9]

http://a764.g.akamai.net/f/764/1052/1h/www.1800flowers.com/800f_assets/images/shop/catalog/3375.jpg

Product Code: 3375
Always in style, our attractive bud vase arrangement includes fresh flowers such as gerbera daisies, heather and monte casino for a bright and cheerful way to send your best!

woot - she's named after a flower... how kool

[welfareloser]

Originally posted by Nanotech9
HELP LADIES! whats a good flower "get well" arrangement under $20? (heh, I'm cheap)

anything she's not allergic to - any flowers are good flowers. also, unless she's nauseated, box o chocolates. (although maybe that's just me...)

just get out there and do it already!!!!

i kinda understand, tho. my sister and one of my best friends have been almost dating but never quite getting around to it for eight years now. they just finally almost got down to it, confessed some deep feelings, but then got scared and now they're not talking, presumeably each waiting for the other to make the next move because neither one wants to get hurt, or seem desperate, or ruin a friendship, etc.

i am two beers away from writing a long email to each of them telling them exactly how the other one feels, along with a good piece of my own mind. i mean, c'mon, EIGHT YEARS!!! i understand caution, but it's time to just take the leap and take a risk! the bigger mistake would be to let an opportunity pass without taking advantage of what could be the best thing that ever happened to you.

i dunno you as well as i do those two bozos, of course, but it's beginning to sound like the planes in the air, the parachute's on tight, the door is open, and y'all are just standing there staring at your shoes.

3...

2...

1...

JUMP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[mojo]

Originally posted by Nanotech9
w00t w00t! I was RIGHT! I called her up and sure enuf she was sick..

I offered to get here anything if she needed it etc... Oooo, I'm sooo thoughtfull!!!

2 points for Nano! :D

now i see your "reservation." your "reservation" was that you like her if she likes you. how noncommittal of you :rolleyes:

[Nanotech9]

no no no... thats not it... my reservations are about her family i guess. They're um, always fighting and stuff, and i dont want to get involved, although im already her "shoulder to cry on" on occasion.

also, yes, a bit of fear of commitment. I dont have a good enough job, or an education, and i dont want to end up getting serious w/ someone w/o having a good job to support us, or and education to at least be elegible to get a good job.

also, i dont want to hurt her. I have a feeling if it got more serious I wouldnt last for more than 6months to a year... and then it would just hurt her, so why do it in the first place?... thats what I'm REALY worried about... hurting her (she already has enough trouble and headaches w/ her family problems, no need to add one more.)

[Anck Su Namun]

Originally posted by Nanotech9
no no no... thats not it... my reservations are about her family i guess. They're um, always fighting and stuff, and i dont want to get involved, although im already her "shoulder to cry on" on occasion.

also, yes, a bit of fear of commitment. I dont have a good enough job, or an education, and i dont want to end up getting serious w/ someone w/o having a good job to support us, or and education to at least be elegible to get a good job.

also, i dont want to hurt her. I have a feeling if it got more serious I wouldnt last for more than 6months to a year... and then it would just hurt her, so why do it in the first place?... thats what I'm REALY worried about... hurting her (she already has enough trouble and headaches w/ her family problems, no need to add one more.)

How do you know you will end up hurting her? She could very well end up hurting you. Anything can happen, you gotta stop it with the what ifs and just gofer it!