02-10-2002, 10:10 PM
There she stands, unaware of my mindless stare. She looks over and I look away. I wonder if she likes me, or if I'm just dreaming. Could it be that my search is over? Have I found the one? Will we be together in the end, or just like everyone else... apart and miserable. Now another has come and diverted my atttention. I talk to her in the hall, and she acts like it's no big deal. Will it ever end? Will it ever be normal? What is wrong with this place, and why is everything so bad? I walk to class and seeing her smile brightens the hallway. Her kind words enter my ears like a cool spring breeze. "How's it going?" she asks me. And I answer, but not with my true feelings. I want to tell her, but I can't. When will it end? When can it be normal? What is wrong with this place and why is everyting so bad? Many hearts have been broken, and mine hasn't...yet it feels as if it has. I want her so much that I am queasy just looking. The feeling in the pit of my stomach, makes me want to go away forever and never come back, but she is there. And that is reason enough to stay. If only I could find a way to win her over, to let her know, the way I feel. I would finally be happy.