oblongmelon
03-23-2002, 04:55 PM
A friend of mine that knows I am plagued by Osmond spam sent me this link-I almost pissed my pants laughing when I read this...
http://hometown.aol.com/milaborden/myhomepage/faith.html
Donnie Osmond Love Me...
My Spiritual Beliefs
My name is Hundari Ahirem and I love Donnie Osmond some people say that it is unhealthy but I tell them otherwise. I first met Donnie at the Brodway hit "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat". I met him back stage and I knew from that moment he was Ala. From the moment he took off his shoe and beat me with it. He then gave me his adress and told me to come over and visit any time. I went over there for the first time and he yelled at me and wildly floged me with his shoe and pushed me down three flights of stairs. Oh yes Donnie Osmond loves me and then there was this other time. Donnie was not home and I was praying in front of his house and his wife came outside and kicked me many times in the head then walked on my face with her stileto heels. Then Donny sent me a get well card when I was in the hospital having reconstructive surgery. It was tickng so I threw it away. Then that very night some sicko blew up a garbage truck. Oh yes then for valentines day Donnie sent me a valentines card disquised as a restraining order. Oh yes Donnie Loves me very much!
Keeping The Faith
It is hard to keep my faith when I am in jail but I try my very best and I know Donnie loves me. It is hard I pray faceing in the direction his house is in. The man next to me talks about droping soap and I do not quite understand. But he scares me very much his name is suzie but I know Donnie will save me. When I am scared I sing the Donnie song:
Donnie Loves me this I know
Because he beats me so
Floging me with his shoe of might
I fear nothing not even night
His wife may scream and shout
Yet I am still devout
Please Donnie save me
Do not push me down stairs
Or beat me with chairs
Donnie loves me this I know
Because he is Ala true to show
I hope that I will be free again soon until that time I will Pray to Donnie for forgiveness. Till then "Much love in Donnie."
Words Of Wisdom
* Love Donnie, Live Donnie, but watch for flying shoes.
* Do not make his wife angry.
* Do not pray on Donnies lawn.
* Do not touch Donnie's car.
* Do not visit Donnie's house 2 in the morning.
* Do not make Donnie angry!
* When the restraining order says 500 ft they mean 500ft!
* DO NOT BEND OVER TO GET SOAP!!!
Spiritual Links
"The Wonders of Beer Nuts and Cabbage"
Bill Gates Lives in My Computer...
Milla Rose Borden
http://hometown.aol.com/milaborden/myhomepage/faith.html
Donnie Osmond Love Me...
My Spiritual Beliefs
My name is Hundari Ahirem and I love Donnie Osmond some people say that it is unhealthy but I tell them otherwise. I first met Donnie at the Brodway hit "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat". I met him back stage and I knew from that moment he was Ala. From the moment he took off his shoe and beat me with it. He then gave me his adress and told me to come over and visit any time. I went over there for the first time and he yelled at me and wildly floged me with his shoe and pushed me down three flights of stairs. Oh yes Donnie Osmond loves me and then there was this other time. Donnie was not home and I was praying in front of his house and his wife came outside and kicked me many times in the head then walked on my face with her stileto heels. Then Donny sent me a get well card when I was in the hospital having reconstructive surgery. It was tickng so I threw it away. Then that very night some sicko blew up a garbage truck. Oh yes then for valentines day Donnie sent me a valentines card disquised as a restraining order. Oh yes Donnie Loves me very much!
Keeping The Faith
It is hard to keep my faith when I am in jail but I try my very best and I know Donnie loves me. It is hard I pray faceing in the direction his house is in. The man next to me talks about droping soap and I do not quite understand. But he scares me very much his name is suzie but I know Donnie will save me. When I am scared I sing the Donnie song:
Donnie Loves me this I know
Because he beats me so
Floging me with his shoe of might
I fear nothing not even night
His wife may scream and shout
Yet I am still devout
Please Donnie save me
Do not push me down stairs
Or beat me with chairs
Donnie loves me this I know
Because he is Ala true to show
I hope that I will be free again soon until that time I will Pray to Donnie for forgiveness. Till then "Much love in Donnie."
Words Of Wisdom
* Love Donnie, Live Donnie, but watch for flying shoes.
* Do not make his wife angry.
* Do not pray on Donnies lawn.
* Do not touch Donnie's car.
* Do not visit Donnie's house 2 in the morning.
* Do not make Donnie angry!
* When the restraining order says 500 ft they mean 500ft!
* DO NOT BEND OVER TO GET SOAP!!!
Spiritual Links
"The Wonders of Beer Nuts and Cabbage"
Bill Gates Lives in My Computer...
Milla Rose Borden