So is this cheating?

[ufcrusher]

This is a question that was posed by a friend of mine concerning a "unfortunate incident" that occurred.

My friend was asleep in bed when his roommates f*ck buddy, who had a key to their apartment for some reason, came into his room (supposedly accidentally she was drunk) thinking that it was his roommates room. Apparently she stripped and immediately went to town on him, giving him a very nice wake up.

From what he said the room was dark enough (he has a sheet over the windows over the blinds to block out light) that he couldnt see who it was and he thought it was his girlfriend suprising him. Apparently she had gone out of town for a couple of days and had told him that she was going to try to make it back by that night but didnt know if it would be possible. So when he woke up to someone riding him, he just assumed that it was his girl.

After the deed was done he fell right back to sleep. When he woke up in the morning and went to wake up his girlfriend he discovered to his suprise that it wasnt her. He woke up the girl, who was more than a bit suprised, and tried to figure out what happened.

This is how they pieced together that she went into the wrong room. Since she was trying to suprise his roommate, she didnt turn on the lights or anything and just got busy. She said that she didnt think anything about the difference in the equipment and just assumed that his roomate was really turned on. (He was telling the story so take that comment with a grain of salt).

So with all of that information, he wanted to know if I thought it was cheating. Which I told him it was.

He then told me that he didnt think it was because he thought he was with his girlfriend and had no intention of being with anyone else. As such, since he didnt intend to do anything and really didnt have a say in it, he didnt think it could be counted against him.

I asked him if he was going to tell his girlfriend and he said he didnt know how to and was trying to figure it out.

So what is everyone's opinion about it? If you sleep with someone, thinking that it is your significant other, and then later discover that it wasnt, did you cheat?

[cruelpupet]

best off telling her


and no its not cheating


BTW heres a key to my house..please give it to that girl

[Acy]

I would say if he really thought it was his girl, then it would not count as cheating.

But...good luck explaining this to his gf:P

[jase71]

Geez I wish I had some people's problems... :eek:

[DoPeY5007]

Wow, first off, I know girls don’t believe that a guy can be asleep and turned on and woken up in the middle of the act, WELL IT IS TRUE ;)



Is it cheating? Well I would say no, the other person has to believe that is the real story and not a lie to just make her think he didn’t cheat.


Is it cheating? Well I would say yes, he slept with the damn girl




So this question can go ether way and can cause a nice argument. Best thing is to tell her though….

[cruelpupet]

oh and also give here these.

*hands over detailed instructions to house*

[brainsmile]

:rolleyes:

[StonedWheat]

Damn that's a crazy story. Sounds almost like an urban legend. But I don't think he cheated. Cheating is in the mind.

[GraingerGuy]

Well...technically...yes...like DoPeY5007 said...he did sleep with the girl.

BUT....the intent was not there and so I wouldn't consider it cheating.

But yes...he should tell his gf....just think if it got around...:eek:

[Napoleon54]

I imagine that the girlfriend might not like the fact that he didn't notice any difference. Confused her with another woman? That won't fly well. He's in deep shi+ no matter what.

[Merlin]

Tell your buddy (if he does exist, cuz this REALLY sounds like an urban myth to me) to keep his mouth shut! He made a mistake. That's all. He really didn't intend to cheat. He did not know it at the time. Now if he tried to explain himself - what's he going to say? She will be hurt that he bumped uglies with someone else and she will be EXTREMELY PISSED and hurt that he could not tell the difference. I am sure the other girl is not blabing about screwing the wrong guy so this has the potential for containment.

This just strikes me as one of those times when just dummying up will keep people from needless hurt. And really, what good would come from telling anyone?

[Kim]

Wow, I'm glad I'm not either of them! :disa: :nono:

[Pinkgirl36]

Originally posted by Kim
Wow, I'm glad I'm not either of them! :disa: :nono:
I *SO* agree with you Kim, I say regardless it's cheating. If anyone I was dating " accidently " slept with someone else our relationship would be over so incrediably fast.....

[topane]

If it was just oral sex, then it's not cheating.

--Bill Clinton

[Merlin]

Note the response from the women. Tell him to not tell anyone - ever.

[Nanotech9]

humm...

well, it was definitely unintentional... and yes, a guy can fly a flag during his sleep, and if in REM sleep, i can see him hardly waking up.

technically, yes, it is being unfaithfull, but not actually intentional cheating.

example: if you drink alcohol accidently, as a minor, you are somewhat responsible (right?), even if you didnt know it was alcohol.

in a situation like this you've got two options... have a serious talk with your G/F, and MAYBE have the other girl present. Or, just tell the G/F yourself and apologize.

OR, press rape charges against the offending female, and then your G/F will REALLY believe you, adn then maybe later you can drop the charges. donno.

[DoPeY5007]

Originally posted by topane
If it was just oral sex, then it's not cheating.

--Bill Clinton if they are from a dif. area code, it isn't cheating


--Road Trip

[Burzhui]

just keep it quiet, and let it be his secret

[Burzhui]

Originally posted by jase71
Geez I wish I had some people's problems... :eek:

take mine please

[tweeteresa]

Originally posted by Napoleon54
I imagine that the girlfriend might not like the fact that he didn't notice any difference. Confused her with another woman? That won't fly well. He's in deep shi+ no matter what.

i agree....he is in deep sh*t n matter what. i'd be hella piss if my bf couldn't tell the difference. i dunno for sure if i'd kick him out....but it'd definitly take a LONG time to forgive and forget. :nono:

[Lolita]

Seriously though, the girl was drunk so she had an excuse for thinking he's her boyfriend, but he has no excuse for mistaking her for his girlfriend...so I say he's in deep s***.

[Burzhui]

just keep it quiet, no one finds out no one gets hurt

[Lolita]

Originally posted by Burzhui
just keep it quiet, no one finds out no one gets hurt

That's true...but these things always have a way of coming out...so I wouldn't get any ideas if I were you :hmm:

[Burzhui]

Originally posted by Lolita


That's true...but these things always have a way of coming out...so I wouldn't get any ideas if I were you :hmm:


she's onto me :shifty:

[OC]

Cheating implies intent. He thought it was his girl. This was not cheating, imho.

-OC

[UnReAL]

ahhh... you gotta love f*ck buddies :P

[faither]

Sex with a chick that's not your girlfriend (or wife) is cheating. She was in the bag; not him. I'm sure if I was blindfolded or awoken from sleep, I'd be able to tell the difference between my wife and another girl bouncing up on top of me. Actually, this might make for an interesting experiment. :D

[welfareloser]

uh-huh... was this just yanked from some lonely wanker's letter to playboy? i mean, seriously. :hmm: i'm not buyin this one for a second. it's too damned cool.

[Ladogaboy]

Wow... I know I would feel violated... :P

Anyway, I wouldn't be able to live without telling my GF, but then again, I'm not sure I could live with the results of telling my GF. Tough one. :shrug:

[jujubees]

The intent wasn't there, so it wasn't cheating.

BUT try explaining that to us women without losing vital parts of your anatomy. :D

[mojo]

so let me get this straight...she had the same body, smelled the same, sounded the same, etc? i wonder what the odds of this are...:hmm:

i dunno about anyone else, but it just seems you can tell. like...always. and i'm curious of how he'd feel if his girl did someone else under those circumstances.

if this was my story, you can count on other people being brought into the it at some point. and i wouldn't finish. sorry, i dunno about accidental intercourse stories :hmm:

[brainsmile]

Originally posted by DarkFury
Hmmm.. maybe he should judge who performs the best... If "FB" girl performs best, dump GF and get with her... :naughty:

If "GF" performs better... then shut the hell up and keep it your "naughty lil secret from a drunken stupor".


Sounds like good ol' fashioned "Jerry Springer TV" to me. :hihi: :nono:

[g222leav]

whether or not it's real...i don't care...
i'll say that most guys will say that it's not cheating, whereas most women will say that it was.


double edge sword if i ask you...i'll just remember to turn on the lights next time i'm sexin'

[mojo]

Originally posted by g222leav
whether or not it's real...i don't care...
i'll say that most guys will say that it's not cheating, whereas most women will say that it was.


double edge sword if i ask you...i'll just remember to turn on the lights next time i'm sexin' whatever i can do...she can do. and if i can do something and not tell...so can she. and if it would hurt me, i'd better not do it to her. and if it would hurt her, i'd still better not do it regardless, cuz there are things that would hurt me that may not hurt her.

"r-e-s-p-e-c-t
find out what it means to me"

[sbp]

Face it, he's screwed either way.

[ufcrusher]

Well I happen to agree with you that somethings about my friends story seem awfully fishy. (Mostly having to do with the ability to tell that it wasnt his GF.) However he adamantly sticks to the fact that he didnt know and says its because he was half asleep.

I dont know, he might be pulling my leg, but he seemed genuinely upset when he relayed the story to me so I tend to believe him on this one.

[sbp]

Any sort of protection used? If not this could put his girlfriend and himself at risk.

[ufcrusher]

I dont think so. Its not something I asked him about, but I would assume that given how it occured, its not likely. I would assume that he is going to get tested now. I know I would under the circumstances.

[mojo]

Originally posted by ufcrusher
Well I happen to agree with you that somethings about my friends story seem awfully fishy. (Mostly having to do with the ability to tell that it wasnt his GF.) However he adamantly sticks to the fact that he didnt know and says its because he was half asleep.

I dont know, he might be pulling my leg, but he seemed genuinely upset when he relayed the story to me so I tend to believe him on this one. oh, i'd be willing to believe that he didn't know for it to start. and i believe he feels bad. it's the rest i'm skeptical about.

[topane]

Originally posted by sbp
Face it, he's screwed either way. :stupid:

I would agree that he didn't intend for it to happen, and since he thought it was his GF, it wasn't cheating (at least, not in spirit). However, I would bet anything that his GF will view it as cheating no matter what he says or no matter what anyone else would say.

[Kim]

I just wonder how possible it is to stay mostly asleep the whole time?? My husband has the ablility to sleep through 2 crying kids, but I can guarantee that if I climb on and do THAT! He's going to wake up!

[welfareloser]

and he probly did notice differences... and just blew them off. becuase, c'mon... who would be doin him except his gf?

well, he needs to tell her, period, especially since i doubt protection was used (and condoms don't work that well during vigorous and/or drunken sex anyway) ... and i guess he gets to test the strength of their relationship. if relationships survive real cheating, a reasonably good relationship will survive this.

and most women would NOT call this cheating... IF they really believe that the guy had no idea. BUT most women WOULD freak out because they would instantly doubt that he had no idea. no matter how much they want to believe, that doubt will nag for a long time. i mean, it's a tough one to swallow... not impossible, but very unlikely... stuff like this doesn't happen every day... cheating and lying about it DOES happen every day. and she will get over it if your bud tries to be understanding instead of defensive (and she's not a psychopath to begin with... in which case he needs to get out anyway... :P )

[mojo]

Originally posted by welfareloser
and he probly did notice differences... and just blew them off. becuase, c'mon... who would be doin him except his gf?"gee honey, your breasts are different...but thanks for getting implants"

"gee honey, your voice sounds different. i love it when you moan like other women"

"wow honey, you never drink...but now you smell like vodka"


:hmm:

sorry...still not buyin it :rolleyes:

[welfareloser]

Originally posted by mojo
"gee honey, your breasts are different...but thanks for getting implants"

"gee honey, your voice sounds different. i love it when you moan like other women"

"wow honey, you never drink...but now you smell like vodka"


:hmm:

sorry...still not buyin it :rolleyes:

if he was half passed out, he wasn't grabbing her breasts... if she was keepin it quiet (since there were ppl in other rooms) it would have been muffled, whispery, if she even making any noise at all... you can unconsciously notice other differences and convince yourself its okay if you are utterly convinced that this is your gf.

i don't think it's AS likely as him thinkin "omg, who is this ****ing me... this ROCKS! now, lessee, how to justify THIS escapade... i know... i had no idea!" ... but it's not all that unlikely.

[mojo]

Originally posted by welfareloser
if he was half passed out, he wasn't grabbing her breasts... if she was keepin it quiet (since there were ppl in other rooms) it would have been muffled, whispery, if she even making any noise at all... you can unconsciously notice other differences and convince yourself its okay if you are utterly convinced that this is your gf.

i don't think it's AS likely as him thinkin "omg, who is this ****ing me... this ROCKS! now, lessee, how to justify THIS escapade... i know... i had no idea!" ... but it's not all that unlikely. maybe your experience tells you this stuff. mine tells me otherwise. the examples weren't all inclusive of what i speculated...there are a million ways to know. personally, i woulda known if it was my ex wife or not at a simple whisper. when you love someone, how could you not know? even half passed out...

[welfareloser]

seriously, if you start from the assumption that this IS the person that it HAS to be, your mind will ignore all evidence to the contrary until the lights get flipped on. human minds are incredibly un-objective when it comes to stuff like that. i could tell you about some mess-with-your-head studies...

seriously. like a simple sketch of a face is just a wierd collection of lines... but you see a face. you know it's lines, you know it's paper, you know it's two dimensional for pete's sake, but you can look at it and see a face because your mind fills in the blanks. different kind of example, but it's the same processes at work...

[mojo]

as a former psych major, i may have heard some of those stories. and knowing this possibility, i would still know if it was the person i loved.

you can make assumptions, but when faced with more stimuli that's contrary to your assumption, there's a point at which you would say "hey, this scent isn't my wife's."

in order for me to not be able to tell, i'd have to be pretty drunk/messed up somehow. we're talking drunk enough for...nothing to happen.

[nickel]

Originally posted by mojo
so let me get this straight...she had the same body, smelled the same, sounded the same, etc? i wonder what the odds of this are...:hmm:

i dunno about anyone else, but it just seems you can tell. like...always. and i'm curious of how he'd feel if his girl did someone else under those circumstances.

if this was my story, you can count on other people being brought into the it at some point. and i wouldn't finish. sorry, i dunno about accidental intercourse stories :hmm:

i have to agree with mojo. he had to know it wasn't his gf. slut-girl probably knew it wasn't her f*ck-boy. she was coherent enough to get to the right room so let's just say she wasn't blackout drunk.
he just didn't want to stop the free for all, and now regrets it. if i was his gf i would eventually find out and then have a real hard time thinking it wasn't cheating.

[Jihforce]

Originally posted by mojo
as a former psych major, i may have heard some of those stories. and knowing this possibility, i would still know if it was the person i loved.

you can make assumptions, but when faced with more stimuli that's contrary to your assumption, there's a point at which you would say "hey, this scent isn't my wife's."

in order for me to not be able to tell, i'd have to be pretty drunk/messed up somehow. we're talking drunk enough for...nothing to happen.

agreed. He wasn't even drunk. I don't think the heavy sleeper excuse works because he seems to remember enough details about the whole incident.
He should have been able to tell if it was his gf. Its not that hard to tell if you've been with your loved one before.
He's a cheater. :thumbdown:

[brainsmile]

boo!

maybe if people didn't have sex until they were married.... <opens up a can of worms and then ducks>

:)

[welfareloser]

Originally posted by brainsmile
boo!

maybe if people didn't have sex until they were married.... <opens up a can of worms and then ducks>

:)

... they'd be getting married at 18. wouldn't THAT be an improvement :rolleyes: stupid ppl are going to act stupid within the context of the rules (including breaking the rules), whatever the rules may be. stupid ppl is the problem.

and if he was sober... this one gets REEEEEEEEAL hard to swallow.

[mojo]

Originally posted by welfareloser
and if he was sober... this one gets REEEEEEEEAL hard to swallow. the only mention of drunk was that she was supposedly and accidentally drunk.

[Merlin]

Dear Penthouse,

This sort of thing never happens to me and I never thought I would be writing but...insert bull***** story about drunk girl mistakenly breaking into your apt to have sex with someone.

What a crock.

[welfareloser]

Originally posted by mojo
the only mention of drunk was that she was supposedly and accidentally drunk.

OKAY. thank you for the clarification.

[mojo]

Originally posted by welfareloser


OKAY. thank you for the clarification. the bold wasn't directed at you :P

[welfareloser]

Originally posted by mojo
the bold wasn't directed at you :P

riiight... you quote me and respond in bold... but you were really talking to your aunt tillie :P

and does your "i know this because i was a psych major" extend to knowing exactly what you might do in a state of half-sleep? puh-leez. it is possible to not fully wake up all the way to ejaculation... and we all know about the rolling over and falling asleep immediately after... :P i'm glad your so sure of your ability to function perfectly under any circumstances, because we all know that when it comes to love and sex, the human mind doesn't make mistakes :rolleyes: and you may very well be right about yourself. but you think you're right about everybody?

and think of these possible-to-very-likely circumstances: he hasn't been dating the gf that long. he's dated/slept with LOTS of women. so he's felt all shapes and sizes, and has a large repertoire of "the familiar."

like i said, if i had to choose, i'd choose "no way" ... because this relies on both the girl and the guy not figgering it out. unlikely. this is the stuff of a letter to penthouse.

he needs to tell the girl. if they have a great relationship with a lot of trust, it'll probly be fine. if he really is dedicated to monogamy, this is likely true or very close to true (ie, he had some doubts but either dismissed them or dint wanna take the chance of asking who it was and pissing his gf off, or whatever... i mean "hey, your butt feels unusually large and squishy" is a good way to get left with blue you-know-whats :P ) if she doesn't believe him... it's probly because there are reasons in that relationship for her not to trust him.

[mojo]

Originally posted by welfareloser
riiight... you quote me and respond in bold... but you were really talking to your aunt tillie :P
my aunt tillie wasn't trying to pass off this story. the bold was from my disbelief of the story (in case you didn't pick up on that :P ). like i said, i'll believe he feels bad. and of course he seems compelling cuz he knows he biffed it. other than that, i'll believe he left two crap cakes under the sheets when he thought of the story to himself and how much sh*t he's in. that's about it ;)

and about the whole psychology thing...wtf was that load you pushed on me? i dunno where you got that stuff. of course i was speaking for myself...but now that you brought it up, i'm kinda curious as to why you're running to this guy's defense all hastily? fact is, the story has a lot of things that it depends on...and you even admitted that it's not entirely believable. so what's the renewed problem with my other stuff?

[whitak24]

ok, it's not cheating. he didn't "try" to do it.....it just happened (if we are to believe his story).

whether his girlfriend would deal with that, probably depends on how she views stuff like this. but i do think she needs to know. she's not going to be happy, but if he doesn't tell her....i hate to think of the schizzle he's in for.

as for whether or not he knew it wasn't her....it would only be believeable if this girl was very similar in appearance/size/build/hair/etc to his GF. if this was true and his room is fairly dark, i think it could be possible. but i'm not really one to know the differences between women.....no experience there

[brainsmile]

we should separate men and women to separate continents until they are ready for such issues. Then they can be on the same third continent. The remaining 4 can go to me.

[mojo]

Originally posted by whitak24
but i'm not really one to know the differences between women.....no experience there did you just call me something bad? :bawl:


(i don't have a lot of experience either, dammit :angry: )
:hihi:

seriously tho...we've mostly agreed that he should tell her. oh, and wear a cup for that. and sleep with one eye open for the next few years (if he makes it that long).

also, be prepared for "i accidentally slept with..." or some other deal. or at least be prepared to lose every argument by default for a few years. if he's lucky, she also "accidentally slept with" someone and has a confession of her own.

[welfareloser]

Originally posted by mojo
if he's lucky, she also "accidentally slept with" someone and has a confession of her own.

wow... i think we have actually found a special circumstance in which she "accidentally sleeping with someone" is LUCKY... :heh:

[welfareloser]

Originally posted by mojo
i'm kinda curious as to why you're running to this guy's defense all hastily? fact is, the story has a lot of things that it depends on...and you even admitted that it's not entirely believable. so what's the renewed problem with my other stuff?

you do this all the time... remember you hammering home the point that nobody can say "ldr's NEVER work?" even tho you admit they often don't? i admit that this is highly unlikely, but i am reacting to the "no way" sentiment. only ppl who can decide if it's true are the bozo and his gf. c'mon, now, do you really want to do a count of the number of times you have said "how would you know; you weren't there" and "it's a personal decision and all advice is worthless" and "it's unlikely but it coulda been because of x y and z" and the like? i'm just acting like... well...

i am mojo.

- mojo

:P

[nickel]

what it all comes down to is, they both knew, and now gotta face up to the consequences.

[whitak24]

Originally posted by mojo
did you just call me something bad? :bawl:


(i don't have a lot of experience either, dammit :angry: )
:hihi:
no, no, no. calm down.

some people might say i'm saying something bad about myself. i'm fine with it though ;)

[gaemul]

Hey ask your friend if he needs another roommate...

hehehehe

[mojo]

Originally posted by welfareloser


you do this all the time... remember you hammering home the point that nobody can say "ldr's NEVER work?" even tho you admit they often don't? i admit that this is highly unlikely, but i am reacting to the "no way" sentiment. only ppl who can decide if it's true are the bozo and his gf. c'mon, now, do you really want to do a count of the number of times you have said "how would you know; you weren't there" and "it's a personal decision and all advice is worthless" and "it's unlikely but it coulda been because of x y and z" and the like? i'm just acting like... well...

i am mojo.

- mojo

:P i made the point about the ldr thing because people were saying "they never work"...which is a lot different than "they don't always work." so, no, i don't "do this all the time." i don't see how you didn't see it before...and it's overflowing to you still not seeing it now :rolleyes:

so you tell me, which is more amicable:

1) i have an ldr and i'm asking for suggestions to coping with the distance so i can continue to be faithful.

or

2) i doinked some girl under very questionable circumstances and want to pass it off as believable.


the first has obviously good intentions. the 2nd could be deceptive in nature. maybe not...but it sounds a lot like it.

again, i have no idea where you're coming from on this stuff. if you wanna try to say i "would have said" something, at least make sense about it. i honestly don't know if you don't understand what i say, or if you're just trying not to understand :disa:

[welfareloser]

Originally posted by mojo
i made the point about the ldr thing because people were saying "they never work"...which is a lot different than "they don't always work." so, no, i don't "do this all the time." i don't see how you didn't see it before...and it's overflowing to you still not seeing it now :rolleyes:

again, i have no idea where you're coming from on this stuff. if you wanna try to say i "would have said" something, at least make sense about it. i honestly don't know if you don't understand what i say, or if you're just trying not to understand :disa:

:stupid: vice versa... where are YOU coming from with the part where i think cheating and ldr's are the same, you space cake?

dude... i'm talking about playing the devil's advocate... bringing up remote possiblities as REAL possibilities... if it happens 90% of the time, that isn't the same as all the time... that there is no "everytime" or "never" ... which you often do... just like you said you did in that first paragraph i quoted up there. i hereby accuse you of being the one trying not to understand me! (imagine an imposing finger-pointing smiley here)

[mojo]

Originally posted by welfareloser


:stupid: vice versa... where are YOU coming from with the part where i think cheating and ldr's are the same, you space cake?when did this happen? try not to say what i think...it's not working for you


dude... i'm talking about playing the devil's advocate... bringing up remote possiblities as REAL possibilities... if it happens 90% of the time, that isn't the same as all the time... that there is no "everytime" or "never" ... which you often do... just like you said you did in that first paragraph i quoted up there. i hereby accuse you of being the one trying not to understand me! (imagine an imposing finger-pointing smiley here) nah...you pulled the "puh-leaz" crap and whatnot. in the other case of ldr's...it's not a "remote possibility" that it would work :rolleyes:

so now i'm pulling out the non sequitur smilie for this case :hmm:

don't tell me i do stuff then distort it out of context to say it's the same as another instance. if it works, it works. if it doesn't, then don't try to retrofit it to be the same thing. the ldr analogy just doesn't work here, unless you can come up with a better reason why it does other than "you did the same thing in totally different circumstances with with very different consequences, odds, and even of a very different nature....other than that, it's the same" :rolleyes: . if you want to claim i do something, then use a better example. try to remember, i didn't do anything, and i'm not on trial. so i fail to see what your point is.

my problem is with the guy's story. you seem to have a problem with me :hmm:

[welfareloser]

Originally posted by mojo
when did this happen? try not to say what i think...it's not working for you
nah...you pulled the "puh-leaz" crap and whatnot.

my problem is with the guy's story. you seem to have a problem with me :hmm:

don't have a bit of a problem with you. and i also have a problem with the guy's story.

previously, you said this:

there's a point at which you would say "hey, this scent isn't my wife's."

when you love someone, how could you not know?

note the "you?" you weren't JUST talking about yourself, as you claimed later. you were making a genralization about ppl. so i was pointing out that you don't know anything about this guy even if you know that about yourself. which is something you often do. am i wrong about this? do you not often point out when ppl go too far generalizing? so then i compared myself (in a very silly and lighthearted manner) to you, for doing something you have often done. you took offense. i am now heading to the corner to flagellate myself as penance for my gross wrongheadedness and turning on the webcam so nija can watch.

does that cover it all?

[mojo]

Originally posted by welfareloser
previously, you said this:

there's a point at which you would say "hey, this scent isn't my wife's."

when you love someone, how could you not know?

note the "you?" you weren't JUST talking about yourself, as you claimed later.
actually i was talking about myself. it was like a moment of reflection. a lot of people will soliloquy...especially in writing.

does that cover it all? nah. but who cares. enough points have been made already.

[mojo]

Originally posted by welfareloser
so i was pointing out that you don't know anything about this guy even if you know that about yourself. which is something you often do. am i wrong about this? do you not often point out when ppl go too far generalizing? so then i compared myself (in a very silly and lighthearted manner) to you, for doing something you have often done. you took offense. btw, if you compared yourself, again, you could have used a better analogy. and who said i took offense? :hmm: you assume too much.

[welfareloser]

Originally posted by mojo
btw, if you compared yourself, again, you could have used a better analogy. and who said i took offense? :hmm: you assume too much.

eyerolling... "disappointed" smiley... i must be trying to not understand you... if you dint know how you were coming off, be more aware. you huwt my widdle feewings :neartears:

and what does using the word "you" in the general context have to do with a soliloquy? yeah, you were soliloquizing... and also generalizing.

[mojo]

Originally posted by welfareloser


eyerolling... i think you knwo how you were coming off. if you dint, be more aware.
aware of what? that if i point out that someone is being lambasted for no reason that it might be used as an example of someone having the obvious pointed out? i don't get what you're saying here...

and what does using the word "you" in the general context have to do with a soliloquy? are you telling me you've never done this yourself? then maybe i take more liberties with words than you. (even assuming you're right about the context)

if you wanna pick each part of each of my posts apart to try to point out something that you imagine i'm saying, this could take a very long time...

[welfareloser]

Originally posted by mojo
aware of what? that if i point out that someone is being lambasted for no reason that it might be used as an example of someone having the obvious pointed out? i don't get what you're saying here...
are you telling me you've never done this yourself? then maybe i take more liberties with words than you. (even assuming you're right about the context)

if you wanna pick each part of each of my posts apart to try to point out something that you imagine i'm saying, this could take a very long time...

you're first paragraph makes no sense...

and i'll stop when you do...

[mojo]

Originally posted by welfareloser


you're first paragraph makes no sense...

and i'll stop when you do... i told you i didn't know what you were getting at. makes perfect sense. you said i knew how i was coming off. in light of all the stuff you said about me regarding the ldr thread, i assumed that was it. i could be wrong. but if it makes no sense, it's because i don't see where you're coming from. where the heck are you coming from?

and i kinda had the feeling you wanted the last word...which is why i didn't stop :P

[mojo]

Originally posted by DarkFury

Heh... and "STILL" haven't stopped...

(You related to Puff Daddy/P Diddy by chance? :hihi: ) actually i did...contingent upon her stopping. i usually duck out of those, but today wasnt the day for that ;). too many "you said this" stuff regarding stuff i didn't say or taken outta context. you know how that can get :hihi:

[molecularfire]

Well... this thread went off the topic pretty effectively. Alright both of you... here are your pistols. Now remember, 10 paces, then turn and fire.



As for my opinion: If we assume that his story was true, then I don't think he was cheating (if we assume his story is false, there's no point in discussing b/c I don't think anyone here would question whether that was cheating). Cheating, like murder in my opinion implies intent. Accidentally killing someone is not murder. He wasn't cheating, he was however, f23king some girl. That said, I don't think it matters that much whether it was an accident or not. If I was his GF (I know I'm gonna regret putting it this way), even if I believed his story, I'm gonna have a hard time getting over it. Accidental or not... i'm still gonna have to be able to look at him and get the image of him f@#king some girl out of my mind. If their relationship was strong, they've got a shot.

[Ladogaboy]

Well, the official answer just came from my GF.
"No. It is unfortunate, but it is not cheating. If I wanted to surprise you, I might try doing that."

hehe, I like the second part of the response best. :naughty:

[MJordanash]

Originally posted by nickelback


i have to agree with mojo. he had to know it wasn't his gf. slut-girl probably knew it wasn't her f*ck-boy. she was coherent enough to get to the right room so let's just say she wasn't blackout drunk.
he just didn't want to stop the free for all, and now regrets it. if i was his gf i would eventually find out and then have a real hard time thinking it wasn't cheating.
Much agreed. You cant tell me that he didnt know any differences between his girlfriend and this other girl. Will be interesting when she does find out if he decides not to tell her straight out.