View Full Version : Joke: In flight converstions
12-06-2002, 02:03 PM
Two strangers are sitting in an adjacent seats in airplane. One guy says to the other, "Let's talk. I hear that the flight will go faster if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger."
The other guy, who had just opened a good book, closes it slowly, takes off his glasses and asks, "What would you like to discuss?"
The first guy says, "Oh, I don't know; how about Nuclear Power?"
The other guy says, "OK, that could make for some pretty interesting conversation. But let me ask you a question first: A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff, but the deer excretes pellets; the cow, big patties; and the horse, clumps of dried grass. Why is that?"
The first guy says, "I don't know."
The other guy says, "Oh? Well then, do you really think you're qualified to discuss Nuclear Power when you don't know $hit?
12-06-2002, 02:12 PM
that's not bad. how's this one? got it today....
A Russian and an American wrestler were about set to square off for the Olympic gold medal. Before the final match, the American wrestler's trainer came to him and said, "Now, don't forget all the research we've done on this Russian. He's never lost a match because of this 'pretzel' hold he has. Whatever you do, don't let him get you in this hold! If he does, you're finished!"
The American wrestler nodded in acknowledgment. As the match started, the American and the Russian circled each other several times looking for an opening. All of a sudden, the Russian lunged forward, grabbing the American and wrapping him up in the dreaded pretzel hold.
A sigh of disappointment arose from the crowd, and the trainer buried his face in his hands, for he knew all was lost. He couldn't even watch the ending. Suddenly, there was a scream, a cheer from the crowd, and the trainer raised his eye just in time to watch the Russian flying up in the air. The Russian's back hit the mat with a thud, and the American collapsed on top of him, making the pin and winning the match.
The trainer was astounded. When he finally got the American wrestler alone, he asked, "How did you ever get out of that hold? No one has ever done it before!" The wrestler answered, "Well, I was ready to give up when he got me in that hold, but at the last moment I opened my eyes and saw this pair of balls right in front of my face. I had nothing to lose, so with my last ounce of strength I stretched out my neck and bit those babies just as hard as I could."
"So," the trainer exclaimed, "that finished him off, did it?" "No, but you'd be amazed how strong you get when you bite your own balls!"
12-06-2002, 02:18 PM
Originally posted by cheapbast@rd
"So," the trainer exclaimed, "that finished him off, did it?" "No, but you'd be amazed how strong you get when you bite your own balls!" aaahahahahahahahahaha!!
12-06-2002, 02:25 PM
I don't have a joke but a recent personal experience when going home from San Fransciso. My gf and I were waiting to board a plane so we sat down in the waiting area. This old lady about 50-60 starts talking on her cell phone to a friend of hers. It's hard not to eavesdrop but she was very audible and talking non-chalantly about her trip over that centered around her threesome with anohter lady and a guy and how awful it was. She just went on and on about it.
So not exactly an in flight conversation but a conversation I heard nonetheless on my way back home.
12-06-2002, 02:56 PM
those were funny jokes guys! :D
12-06-2002, 04:43 PM
A guy with a black eye gets on a plane and goes to his seat. To his amazement, the guy he is going to sit next to has a black eye. The first guy says: "Wow, that is ironic that you also have a black eye. How did it happen"?
"Well", the second guy says, "I was in line to get my ticket and the lady at the counter had very large breasts. Instead of saying 'I would like one ticket to Pittsburg' I had accidently said ' I would like one picket to Tittsburg'. So, the lady socked me a good one."
"Amazing", said the first guy. "Slip of the tongue is exactly what happened to me. I was at the breakfast table this morning with my wife and instead of saying 'Honey, please pass the milk' I accidently said 'I want a divorce you evil, sadistic bitch'.
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