how to embarrass your mother in public

[welfareloser]

so i'm at the grocery store with evilgremlin, who has taken to MAKING UP NAMES FOR PEOPLE. he has always had a need to say hi to everyone and talk incessantly, but this is a new dimension. he'll walk up to someone in the cereal aisle and say, "Hi piggy! whatchoo doin? you gettin cereal? me too!" then in the meat aisle it was "Hi maggot! gettin the meat!" so i'm calmly explaining to people that seem wierded out that he is simply making up names for people, and he has no idea what he's saying (he probably meant something along the lines of peggy and maggie... but who knows?)

okay, so i'm not too embarassed. i know my kid is wierd. then we're in the checkout. he says hi to "momo" the checker and explains that we're gonna give her the monies. fine. then an older black woman in a black leather coat walks past him and smiles and says, "hi, friendly!" the boy gets a huge grin and yells "Hi black murray!" i'm so stunned that all i can say to eg is "what?" which of course gets him to repeat it. "That's black murray! he has a coat! bye, black murray!"

oh. my. god.

only i know that he was referring to the color of the woman's striking black leather coat... and it really didn't help matters that he got the gender wrong, either.

*sigh*

there was really no good way to try to explain that one to anyone.

[Kim]

Kids like to keep us on our toes don't they. :heh:

Brayden likes to tell everyone that someday he will have a giant pee-pee like daddy.

[Nija]

Originally posted by Kim

Brayden likes to tell everyone that someday he will have a giant pee-pee like daddy.

LMAO
:heh: :bigmouth: oh THAT'S FARKING GREAT

*falls down laughing*

[welfareloser]

Originally posted by Kim
Kids like to keep us on our toes don't they. :heh:

Brayden likes to tell everyone that someday he will have a giant pee-pee like daddy.

lord. that's a good one. eek.

[whitak24]

Originally posted by Kim
Brayden likes to tell everyone that someday he will have a giant pee-pee like daddy.
on the positive side, i'm sure it makes your husband happy :D

i mean, what man doesn't want everyone to know that they have a "giant pee-pee"? :)

[Kim]

Yep, he's just as proud as can be! :rolleyes: ;)

[sbp]

yep also making up the lamest jokes and then thinking its hysterical. :/

[mcs328]

Originally posted by Kim
Kids like to keep us on our toes don't they. :heh:

Brayden likes to tell everyone that someday he will have a giant pee-pee like daddy.

I wish I had a kid like that. I would feel so proud. :king:

[OC]

:eek2:

[oblongmelon]

haha-good stuff welfare-wait till you have 3!

[CarolinaGal]

Bless his heart.

Remember those caramel lollipops they used to sell - Slowpokes? Maybe you could try those.....

Or bribery??

I wouldn't try my solution, which was to threaten to beat her with a stick (Picture sweet angel chanting "mommy beats me, mommy beats me" at the top of her lungs to the tune of "are you sleeping?")

Hey, maybe nobody understood him...

HAHAHAHA

<<very thankful I'm out of that stage>>

[welfareloser]

Originally posted by DarkFury


Sugar Daddy's!!!!! :lick:

(But I do remember Slowpokes & Black Cows as well... :D )

mmmmm, candy....

he had his face in a bag of doritos at the time, but NOTHIN can stop him from socializing. most extroverted person i know. i'm a bit antisocial usually, but i just can't be with him in tow, picking up friends on my behalf... :rolleyes:

[sizemic1]

WelfareLoser...

eg RULES!! :D

I hope my kids can be as weird as EG and maybe half as weird as Revil :P

[attgig]

Originally posted by Kim
Brayden likes to tell everyone that someday he will have a giant pee-pee like daddy.

definitely teaching that one to my kids ;)

[cheapie]

Originally posted by attgig


definitely teaching that one to my kids ;)


yeah. me too. now how do i go about brainwashing my kid into thinking i have a giant....

[welfareloser]

Originally posted by DarkFury
How to embarrass your mother in public...

Well for starters, the kid could wait until you got up to the register at the grocery store and tell the Cashier...

<embarrassing momement>

"Well, I really wanted Mommy to buy me some candy and some Cocoa Puffs... however she told me that we didn't have any money for that....

However, I guess we still got enough money for her to still buy a six pack of Budweiser and some cigarettes... :eek:

</embarrassing momement>

is this one that you pulled on your mom? :heh:

eg is just like my sister evilbigmouth... we call them jango and boba. here's one from the evilbigmouth archives:

my mom is walking through target with my 6 year old self and my 3 year old sister. a heavily tattooed, shaved-headed, black-clad dude walks by pushing a baby stroller. evilbigmouth walks up to him yelling indignantly: "hey! hey you! daddies aren't supposed to look like that!"