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Jenny
11-06-2003, 10:00 PM
You can't read this and stay in a bad mood.....

1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
Unique Up On It

2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
Tame Way, Unique Up On It

3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?
They Take The Psycho Path

4. How Do You Get Holy Water?
You Boil The Hell Out Of It

5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?
Dam!

6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?
Polaroids

7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?
A Stick

8. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?
Nacho Cheese

9. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?
Subordinate Clauses

10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
Quattro Sinko

11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?
Spoiled Milk

12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?
Frostbite

13. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?
A Nervous Wreck

14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
Anyone Can Roast Beef

15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?
Right Where You Left Him

16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
Because They Have Big Fingers

17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?
Because It Scares The Dog

18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?
Sanka

19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover?
The Location Of The Dirt Bag

20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?
Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat

21. What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer, and a Bad Skydiver?
A Bad Golfer Goes ... Whack, "Crap"!
A Bad Skydiver Goes ... "Crap"!, Whack!

22. How are a Texas Tornado and a Tennessee Divorce the same?
Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer!!

InfiniteNothing
11-06-2003, 10:29 PM
For some reason I thought these would be jokes about short people. Great post though.

RoniMan
11-06-2003, 11:22 PM
how do you catch a polar bear?

dig a hole, and put green peas around it.

when the polar bear comes to take a pea, kick him in the icehole.

revil
11-06-2003, 11:36 PM
almost every single word is capitalized...

Jenny
11-06-2003, 11:39 PM
lol I just copied it. ;)

bachviet
11-07-2003, 07:18 AM
Those are funny.

cheapie
11-07-2003, 07:28 AM
i googled "short jokes" looking for jokes about short people and this is what i came up with.

What do Viagra And Disney Land have in common?

They both cause you to stand around for an hour waiting for a two minute ride!!

Q: Why do woman get their belly buttons pierced?

A: So they have a place to hang a air freshener!


Q:What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?

A:About 45 pounds!!

Q:What is the difference between a huband and a boyfriend?

A:About 45 minutes !!


How can you tell a blonde is having a bad day?

When she has a tampon behind her ear and can't find her pencil

nickel
11-07-2003, 07:28 AM
oh-oh, i've got one, i've got one!

What's hairy on the outside, wet on the inside, starts with c, ends with t, and has a u and an n in the middle?
















A coconut

Merlin
11-07-2003, 07:50 AM
Originally posted by Jenny
You can't read this and stay in a bad mood.....

1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
Unique Up On It

2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
Tame Way, Unique Up On It


Q) What is Ethernet?




A) It is what you use to catch the ether bunny.

nickel
11-07-2003, 08:46 AM
mine was much better :P

Merlin
11-07-2003, 09:30 AM
Yeah, but I continue to try.

nickel
11-07-2003, 09:33 AM
try try again
just do it, and don't ask first :P

cheapie
11-07-2003, 09:45 AM
Originally posted by nickelback
try try again
just do it, and don't ask first :P

Do or do not. There is no try.

http://www.coe.tamu.edu/~distance/images/yoda.jpg

RoniMan
11-07-2003, 11:26 AM
What do you do when you see a 500 lb gorilla sleeping in your bed?

-- sleep on the sofa

What do you do when you see a 500 lb gorilla cooking in your kitchen?

-- eat out

What do you do when you see a 500 lb gorilla wearing your favorite necktie?

-- go see a psychiatrist, you've been seeing too many 500lb gorillas lately.

Sir_Froggy
11-07-2003, 06:16 PM
haha those are good

DankNstickY
11-07-2003, 09:23 PM
Originally posted by nickelback
oh-oh, i've got one, i've got one!

What's hairy on the outside, wet on the inside, starts with c, ends with t, and has a u and an n in the middle?

A coconut

i guessed it right

bachviet
11-08-2003, 08:26 AM
Originally posted by RoniMan
What do you do when you see a 500 lb gorilla sleeping in your bed?

-- sleep on the sofa

What do you do when you see a 500 lb gorilla cooking in your kitchen?

-- eat out

What do you do when you see a 500 lb gorilla wearing your favorite necktie?

-- go see a psychiatrist, you've been seeing too many 500lb gorillas lately.
Pretty good...