This is why our HR dept keeps expanding. so they can waste our money on this crap

[cheapie]

this was part of a diversity newsletter that i just got. i find it unbelievable that we pay people to come up with this drivel when we don't have enough engineers and support people to do all that needs to be done.

http://www.littleboyinc.com/uploader/uploads/wheel.jpg

[gear02]

yeah...the HR folks completely astound me with their level of self-imporantance...and why management cares so much about them...

I attribute it to half of the HR dept sleeping with half of the management staff... :D

[RoniMan]

see if you can get them to spend any money on this...

http://www.littleboyinc.com/uploader/uploads/stresskit.gif

[revil]

Originally posted by RoniMan
see if you can get them to spend any money on this...

http://www.littleboyinc.com/uploader/uploads/stresskit.gif
I smell an anonymous memo going out...

[cheapie]

when i saw that, i was like, wtf? you've got to be kidding me. i'm busier than hell trying to get stuff out the door and i get this newsletter with all of this stuff.

[topane]

At least your HR people do something. All our HR person does is send around emails with pretty fonts and clipart telling us to drive carefully when the roads are icy.

[cheapchinese]

how come our hr department do a bunch of things....
guess it because our company aint as big as yours.. .

[bachviet]

Have you ever heard of Super High Intensity Training at your work place?

[Markel]

I remember when my last company had all kinds of "Valuing Diversity Training" and such garbage - we used to refer to it as "VD Training". :heh:

[ialsohaveadream]

We get the exact same customer service training every year. The exercises are useless, and it doesn't help the people who desperately need it.

Last time we had one, they had us write anonymous notes that would be passed along to the higher ups suggesting improvements that we see should be made. My suggestion? "Let's trim some of the fat from HR." Luckily, my boss is one of those who will get a kick out of reading that.

[DaFunkyUnit]

Originally posted by gear02

I attribute it to half of the HR dept sleeping with half of the management staff... :D

but you gotta admit, usually all the hotties are in HR. Or finance. Or logistics. "Oh! Oh! Oh!" :D

[ialsohaveadream]

Originally posted by DaFunkyUnit


but you gotta admit, usually all the hotties are in HR. Or finance. Or logistics. "Oh! Oh! Oh!" :D

What about the honies in janitorial services? Don't hate!

[DaFunkyUnit]

Originally posted by ialsohaveadream


What about the honies in janitorial services? Don't hate!

well, if broomsticks and turpentine is your cup of tea, then more power to ya

[cheapie]

ahh yes. this months bit of nonsense from our hardworking hr folks. wtf are they talking about?



Welcome back! Welcome to the second issue of the Truck Diversity, Inclusion & Worklife newsletter, prepared by the Truck Diversity, Inclusion and Worklife (DIW) Council for all Truck Group employees globally. We’re pleased to report that the Council has been busy preparing for the implementation of the DIW program within the Truck group on a worldwide basis. This work included a recent pre-launch at our South Bend plant and development of an overall implementation plan. This issue highlights some of our recent progress – we welcome your feedback! Program launched at South Bend.

During the week of April 13th, the South Bend, Indiana Heavy Duty plant launched the first Diversity, Inclusion and Worklife program to be initiated within the Truck group. The launch began with leadership and communication meetings for all “teammates”. “This initiative really reinforces the teaming culture that exists within South Bend; and really applies to all facilities”, said John X, South Bend Plant Manager. “Understanding one another’s differences and similarities and using the awareness to strengthen how we work together will have a direct impact on productivity”. The South Bend plant has approximately 100 “teammates” who have a motto of “Be Prepared to Be Involved” – and we believe they are! The next step for the South Bend team will be focus group sessions designed to provide a more intimate setting for feedback and inclusion awareness. We are looking forward to South Bend leading the way toward Diversity, Inclusion and Worklife in Truck.Coming to you soon…South Bend may be “driving the Truck”, as Bill X, HR Manager at the South Bend plant stated, however the Diversity, Inclusion & Worklife (DIW) program launch is coming to your town soon! Throughout April and May, DIW Council members will work with leadership teams at your respective locations to determine the best local approach. The Council’s intent is to ensure the program meets individual plant/facility needs and to avoid a “one size fits all” program. In order to do this, an assessment of the current culture will occur with input from employees at each Truck plant/facility. Once this has been completed, the next step will be a series of awareness activities for employees and later, local DIW Teams will be established. We are looking forward to assisting all of the plants/facilities in the development of local implementation plans. As our vision states, we are “Working together today to secure tomorrow – Unique People, One Team, One Future.”

Manchester a benchmark for the Truck DIW program:

Efforts to drive Diversity, Inclusion and Worklife programs are not new to our Manchester UK plant. During the past year, employees have been engaged in an effort to create an environment of inclusion, which is consistent with the global Truck DIW effort. In fact, the Manchester program vision statement, “Working together today to secure tomorrow – Unique People, One Team, One Future”, has been adopted for the Truck wide program. Gary X, Plant Manager of the Manchester plant, is a DIW Council member and leads the Culture & Values Sub-Team. His contribution to the team has been valuable as he shares the experiences of the Manchester initiative.

The Council has also been busy benchmarking a number of sources to ensure we’re learning from best practices in other organizations. One benchmark included the Automotive Group, which recently implemented their diversity and inclusion program. We’re pleased that Greco X, Shenandoah Plant Manager and Roderick X, VORAD Business Unit Manager, recently joined the Truck group from Automotive. Both Greco and Roderick had experience participating on the Automotive Implementation Team and now are sharing Automotive best practices with the DIW Council. This will help us ensure we are fostering the Eaton Power of One in the implementation phase of the Truck DIW Program. The Automotive experience has provided the Council with insight on how to best engage employees throughout the implementation phase of the program. The Council has also benchmarked Ford Motor Company, which has a very mature program in place. Learning about their approach to recognition and awareness will help as we develop similar strategies. If you have diversity, inclusion or worklife programs at your facility, please share them with us! Email DIW Council Chair, Robynne X, at...


what is this drivel talking about? there is nothing of substance in here. this lady likely makes 140k+ and this is what she does. unbelievable!

[Nija]

ahh yes. this months bit of nonsense from our hardworking hr folks. wtf are they talking about?




what is this drivel talking about? there is nothing of substance in here. this lady likely makes 140k+ and this is what she does. unbelievable!

I've decided that you have entirely to many Malcom X wannabe's at your work...

[cheapie]

i have no problem with diversity if it means making sure that every race/creed/gender has an equal opportunity to gain employment here. however, making the diversity score of a manager's department part of his/her compensation is bull****. essentially, there is literally a cash an incentive for managers NOT to hire my white ass. that pisses me off. and then i have to read this document sent to me while i'm working away trying to make the company money. we are dying for more account managers and engineers. do they hire more? nope. they are too busy hiring hr people to run these programs.

[gwilks98]

This thread reminded me of the workplace horoscope I saw a while back:
(Read the section on HR)

Astrology tells us about you and your future simply by your birthday. The Chinese Zodiac uses the year of your birth. Demographics tell us what you like, dislike, whom you vote for, what you buy, and what you watch on TV. Well, the Corporate Zodiac goes a step further: simply by your job title, people will have you all figured out...

MARKETING: You are ambitious yet stupid. You chose a marketing degree to avoid having to study in college, concentrating instead on drinking and socializing, which is pretty much what your job responsibilities are now. Least compatible with Sales.

SALES: Laziest of all signs, often referred to as "marketing without a degree," you are also self-centered and paranoid. Unless someone calls you and begs you to take their money, you like to avoid contact with "customers" so you can "concentrate on the big picture." You seek admiration for your golf game throughout your life.

TECHNOLOGY: Unable to control anything in your personal life, you are instead content to completely control everything that happens at your workplace. Often even YOU don't understand what you are saying, but who the hell can tell?! It is written that the geeks shall inherit the Earth.

ENGINEERING: One of only two signs that actually studied in school, it is said that ninety percent of all personal ads are placed by engineers. You can be happy with yourself: your office is typically full of all the latest "ergodynamic" gadgets. However, we all know what is really causing your "carpal tunnel"...

ACCOUNTING: The only other sign that studied in school, you are mostly immune from office politics. You are the most feared person in the organization; combined with your extreme organizational traits, the majority of rumors concerning you say that you are completely insane.

HUMAN RESOURCES: Ironically, given your access to confidential information, you tend to be the biggest gossip within the organization. Possibly the only other person that does less work than marketing, you are unable to return any calls today because you have to get a haircut, have lunch, and mail a letter.

MIDDLE MANAGEMENT/DEPARTMENT MANAGEMENT/"TEAM LEADS": Catty, cut-throat, yet completely spineless, you are destined to remain at your current job for the rest of your life. Unable to make a single decision you tend to measure your worth by the number of meetings you can schedule for yourself. Best suited to marry other "Middle Managers," as everyone in your social circle is a "Middle Manager."

SENIOR MANAGEMENT: Catty, cut-throat, yet completely spineless, you are destined to remain at your current job for the rest of your life. Unable to make a single decision you tend to measure your worth by the number of meetings you can schedule for yourself. Best suited to marry other "Senior Managers," as everyone in your social circle is a "Senior Manager."

CUSTOMER SERVICE: Bright, cheery, positive, you are a fifty-cent cab ride from taking your own life. As a child very few of you asked your parents for a little cubicle for your room and a headset so you could pretend to play "Customer Service." Continually passed over for promotions, your best bet is to sleep with your boss.

[InfiniteNothing]

yeah...the HR folks completely astound me with their level of self-imporantance...and why management cares so much about them...


Suggest HR start a suggestion box and then put in that suggestion box to cut HR. I get the feeling that HR is really just there for the occasional work place dispute. I'll do it for your company at 1/2 of what your current person gets.

Or you could ask why it's there. It might just be profitable to have an abundant source of diversity.

i have no problem with diversity if it means making sure that every race/creed/gender has an equal opportunity to gain employment here.
I don't think equal opportunity implies diversity. You are saying "I like the opportunity for diversity, but can do without." You don't really like diversity if you don't like everything else it comes with.

[cheapie]

Suggest HR start a suggestion box and then put in that suggestion box to cut HR. I get the feeling that HR is really just there for the occational work place dispute. I'll do it for your company at 1/2 of what your current person gets.


person? for our campus of 4-500 people we have 10 ****ing hr people.

[whitak24]

ahh yes. this months bit of nonsense from our hardworking hr folks. wtf are they talking about?




what is this drivel talking about? there is nothing of substance in here. this lady likely makes 140k+ and this is what she does. unbelievable!
she makes $140k and writes THAT???? holy crap. unreal. how can i get her job?

that is some of the most meaningless "business" writing i have ever written.

[Nija]

she makes $140k and writes THAT???? holy crap. unreal. how can i get her job?

that is some of the most meaningless "business" writing i have ever written.


it should be re-worded...

it should be...

that is some of the most meaningless "business" writing i have ever seen. (as opposed to written ;) )

That is why she makes 140k.

Don't hate the playa, hate the game.
-DF :P

[cheapie]

ahaha...nice nija.

guess what they did this year. they got rid of a guy in hr that was in charge of the health and safety on the campus (i.e. emergency plan, security, msds data, fire stuff, etc.) because he didn't have a college degree. so they hired a guy to replace him, who hired another guy to work for him. so the original guy wasn't smart enough to do the job so they canned him but the second guy is so good that he has to hire someone to help him to the same dayumm job the "dumbass" was doing?

don't get me wrong. my company rocks. we have a great gm and our ceo is oustanding. it just that our local hr dept is WAYYYY out of hand.
and we're talking about GOOD paying jobs here. prolly both at least 50k+.

[whitak24]

it should be re-worded...

it should be...

that is some of the most meaningless "business" writing i have ever seen. (as opposed to written ;) )

That is why she makes 140k.

Don't hate the playa, hate the game.
-DF :P
geez that was retarded. i obviously cannot type.

and the frightening thing is that i got plenty of sleep last night. who knows what would have come out had i been sleep-deprived? :eek:

actually, i was just trying to own up to the fact that i wrote that memo, because i'm actually a woman who works at cheapie's company

[ialsohaveadream]

This thread reminded me of the workplace horoscope I saw a while back:
(Read the section on HR)

HUMAN RESOURCES: Ironically, given your access to confidential information, you tend to be the biggest gossip within the organization. Possibly the only other person that does less work than marketing, you are unable to return any calls today because you have to get a haircut, have lunch, and mail a letter.


Holy crap. I like everyone at my job, but this describes our HR department to the letter. We have a lady who will yell at us for discussing other people's jobs, but she feels free to discuss people's medical problems, financial problems, etc with anyone.

[gear02]

Holy crap. I like everyone at my job, but this describes our HR department to the letter. We have a lady who will yell at us for discussing other people's jobs, but she feels free to discuss people's medical problems, financial problems, etc with anyone.

she yells at you for discussing other people's jobs? Are your jobs all secret and classified or something? Damn, I hate those kinds of people...those who think their job is more important than others who, for example, actually matter.

[ialsohaveadream]

she yells at you for discussing other people's jobs? Are your jobs all secret and classified or something? Damn, I hate those kinds of people...those who think their job is more important than others who, for example, actually matter.

I meant she yells at us for discussing their performance, even if we are supervising the people who we are discussing. It's ridiculous.

The funniest part is when she had to give everyone a customer service training class, taught by her. She asks, "Any questions?" I butt in with, "So if someone is waiting to speak to me outside my office, I SHOULDN'T pick up my phone and call someone, without even acknowledging this person?" She didn't even get that I was referring to her behavior, she simply said, "No, you can always make that call later." :rolleyes:

[gear02]

I meant she yells at us for discussing their performance, even if we are supervising the people who we are discussing. It's ridiculous.

The funniest part is when she had to give everyone a customer service training class, taught by her. She asks, "Any questions?" I butt in with, "So if someone is waiting to speak to me outside my office, I SHOULDN'T pick up my phone and call someone, without even acknowledging this person?" She didn't even get that I was referring to her behavior, she simply said, "No, you can always make that call later." :rolleyes:

haha...we need to have some ability to "recall" some employees, like cali did...

[Showtime]

Im glad that HR girl and I didnt work out. I'd hate to be dating one "those HR people."

-jel:halo:

[cheapie]

she makes $140k and writes THAT???? holy crap. unreal. how can i get her job?

that is some of the most meaningless "business" writing i have ever written.


yeah well check out this months edition of pure blather. un****ingbelievable that anybody would write this ****, let alone get paid ungodly sums of money to do so, and then diseminate it to thousands of people.

i guess we have a new acronym. DIW: Diversity, Inclusion & Worklife


A Council structure to support D.I.W. deployment:

The Council has divided into sub-teams to design and facilitate the global deployment of D.I.W. This will result in greater focus in specific deployment areas and provide the Council the opportunity to invite external resources to contribute. The sub-team areas are (1) Culture Assessment - establishing the method of assessing plant & organizational culture relative to D.I.W. and defining specific needs based on culture, (2) D.I.W. Team Implementation – driving the process to implement D.I.W. teams, support team strategies and establish team networks, (3) Awareness & Communications – managing the awareness and communication processes to include internal and external marketing, (4) International Deployment – managing international deployment of D.I.W. in consideration of cultural differences and unique needs.

The “Inclusion Breakthrough: Unleashing the Real Power of Diversity” by Frederick A. Miller and Judith Katz has been selected as a roadmap for our continuous journey through D.I.W. This includes a “Way of Life” model, inclusive behaviors and competencies associated with best companies that have driven successful business results through inclusive cultures. You can read more about the “Inclusion Breakthrough” at www.inclusionbreakthrough.com.

Manchester update by XXX
Manchester's journey to establishing an inclusive culture began in the Spring of 2003, initially influenced by pending European Legislation changes. We began attending a couple of seminars, with the objective of gaining a greater understanding of the legislative impact. It very quickly became apparent that our understanding was restrictive and confined to traditional perceptions and
assumptions that did not address the real need to build the culture of inclusion we needed.

The self-realization of the need for a world-class Inclusion strategy for the plant became remarkably clear!
PROJECT APPROACH:

Our broad approach to the project has 5 main stages, as shown in Figure 1
“The self-realization of the need for a world-class Inclusion strategy for the plant became remarkably clear!”
Figure 1 – Project Approach
Stage 1 –Business case and vision
To develop a World-Class Inclusion strategy for the plant, it was necessary to first identify the vision. What would be different about the organization as a result of our efforts?
"Working together today to secure tomorrow. Unique people, One team, One Future." Our focus centered on developing a business case, demonstrating how Inclusion would contribute to the success of the plant’s performance results.

We explored many pieces of information, including employee survey feedback and key metrics to determine how the employees felt about the organization. This piece of work was vital for the purpose of supporting communication with employees regarding why the plant was driving Inclusion.

Stage 2 – Employee focus groups
Stage 2 allowed us to develop an understanding of how inclusive the employees felt the organization was and where they felt the areas of best practice or opportunity existed. We facilitated a series of focus group sessions with employees from all levels within the plant. Information was gathered in a report detailing the key findings and highlighted areas that linked directly to policies and practices for investigation during Stage 3.

Stage 3 – Policies and practices audit.
This phase of the project provided a detailed review of all policies and practices that related to people within the plant.

Stage 4 – Strategy and implementation plan development
Using the data gathered from the vision, focus groups and policies and practices audit, we were able to develop a strategy and implementation plan. This was linked to active organizational strategies with goals and objectives implicitly built into everyday business practice. In other words, Inclusion shall become a way of life in everything we do, rather than just a label or separate initiative.

Stage 5 – Identify key milestones and measures
In the final stage we are currently establishing “Measures of Success” through the deployment of a diagnostic tool linked to an employee survey, operating on a similar format to the current employee survey.

Stage 6, although not formally defined is
easy………..Repeat!
The journey of harnessing diversity through inclusion has no finishing line! Our joint efforts with D.I.W. further influence the positive journey
Many people believe that diversity is a problem that takes a disproportionate amount of effort to manage. The opposite point of view suggests that it takes more energy to suppress diversity than to unleash it. The real
challenge is to reach that realization!

this **** continues...have you ever read anything with more buzz words and less actual content? what teh hell are they talking about? how about just one example? or one measurable? or stat? :angry: :angry: :angry:

[Jeffbx]

Ah hahahahaha! That has 'Office Space' written all over it...

"establishing an inclusive culture"
"facilitated a series of focus group sessions"
"greater focus in specific deployment areas"
"harnessing diversity through inclusion"

It's been a long time since I've seen so much pure BS on one page.

[cheapie]

that's why our effing hr dept has more than doubled while our sales and engineering have basically stayed the same in spite of huge growth and additional product lines.

[Merlin]

Oy vay! I ain't readin' all that crap!

[sizemic1]

I think I would just reply with:

"Huh?"

or

"Please remove me from your spam list"

[Merlin]

"Please remove me from your spam list"
I tried that one at my office a few weeks ago and was told the only way off the list was to quit. :(

[speedracer120]

Wow, it just reaks of plagarism, i.e. cut and paste job.

[ShawnLee]

I tried that one at my office a few weeks ago and was told the only way off the list was to quit. :(That's a crazy way to opt-out. Haha.

Dude, I say that you write an anonymous fake one, and post it on the walls. Nice.

[herselftheelf]

We had to do Birkman, I am alot of red with touches of yellow.

[faither]

This thread reminds me of the Dilbert cartoon where Catbert delivers the line "You can't spell 'Who cares' without HR. :wavey2: