View Full Version : Who's right: me or her?
I may need a reality check from everyone here on this...
I was helping host a gettogether last night at my apartment, and my girlfriend had a friend from out of town in last night as well. At 10:30, she calls me --
her: "There's a party over near my place we might go to"
ski: "Well, I'll give you a call if people leave from here halfway through" (I would catch a ride with them over to her place... I had been drinking so I wasn't going to be a drunk driver)
A few hours pass, and over the time, I see people making cell phone calls, so I'm guessing they're arranging to be picked up or whatever. Time passes, and no one ends up leaving until 2am. I get back to my computer, and I see some nasty IM's from her:
her: "i know you say you really like me or whatever... but i've never dated a guy who has blown me off so much... i just don'tknow what to think hun... its 1 a.m. and i haven't heard from you so i'm going to go to bed... gnite"
I'm like "WTF!" because I don't think I've done anything wrong. She's got out-of-town company, I have a gettogether to host, and... AHHHH! Grr. I find out later that her out of town guest fell asleep at 11, and the girlfriend wouldn't have minded going to a party while the guest was still sleeping. She started to bust out some sh*t about how I don't care, so I'm like "It's just a stupid phone call... it has nothing to do with emotions!" THEN she gets pissed off that I initially responded to her on IM instead of calling her -- if you say you're going to bed, the last thing you want is to hear your phone going off while you're sleeping IMO. I don't know.
Am I so wrong for not calling her? Even though the conditions were never met for me to call her... it wasn't like I was sitting alone at home in my room and didn't feel like calling her. :confused:
InfiniteNothing
03-28-2004, 10:53 AM
why didn't she call you?
molecularfire
03-28-2004, 12:31 PM
One thing that my GF has taught me... I'm the guy, I'm always wrong. :P
Seriously though... it doesn't sound to me like she's pissed about a one time thing. Some of her statements sounds like there's some unresolved feelings she has had towards you before this and this is just another nail in your coffin. Has there been other episodes like this, or is this a first time thing. If she got all pissed because of just this incident, then I think she's being overly harsh on you. If this isn't then it would depend on 1) what happened the other times 2) what she thinks happened the other times.
One question... If memory serves me right, wasn't it you and your GF that had the previous problem where she ditched you and ended up crashing at her ex's place? If yes, there might be another level of emotions complicating this.
Airencracken
03-28-2004, 01:33 PM
Tell her to stop whining. My gf did this to me once and I had a SERIOUS talk with her. That fixed it.
I think you should have called but that's it. Tell her to save the drama for her mama.
Grubbie
03-28-2004, 01:52 PM
I would say, if she wanted to come over she shoulda of called. It is her fault she didn't call you saying her friend went to bed.
But girls always want you to call them, but you had a good idea, why would I want to call at 2 and wake her up. But she is like well you shoulda called i didn't care about sleeping...
Just tell her why you didn't and say she shoulda of called you, then run for the hill as she yells at you.
Originally posted by molecularfire
One question... If memory serves me right, wasn't it you and your GF that had the previous problem where she ditched you and ended up crashing at her ex's place? If yes, there might be another level of emotions complicating this.
She's the one... I bought her excuse that she felt sick and just fell asleep over there. It's fartetched, but I believe in her honesty. We moved on from that :)
I went over to her place today, and everything seemed better. Something tells me from all the empty beer boxes I saw that she had been drinking as well, and probably got emotional on me.
Me not calling HAS happened before, but she verbally spanked me, and that time I should have called.
Thanks for the input... I really appreciate the 3rd person on this :D
ugggh.... just got an IM
her: " hey doll... i know tonight is rough for you but we gotta do a little talkin'.... don't concern yourself with it tonight... i just think we may have rushed into things"
:bash:
oblongmelon
03-28-2004, 08:25 PM
Originally posted by skiAtomic
ugggh.... just got an IM
her: " hey doll... i know tonight is rough for you but we gotta do a little talkin'.... don't concern yourself with it tonight... i just think we may have rushed into things"
:bash:
omg she called you DOLL? bwhahahahha...what a simply condescending name! DUMP HER!
Originally posted by oblongmelon
omg she called you DOLL? bwhahahahha...what a simply condescending name! DUMP HER!
I call my bartender doll. I also call her darlin'. :P
oblongmelon
03-28-2004, 09:10 PM
Originally posted by Nija
I call my bartender doll. I also call her darlin'. :P
Bartender's don't count :)
yippiekiyeh
03-28-2004, 11:53 PM
Ski ugh... she's got more drama than anything. Don't sink to her level bro. You should be having red flags/sirens/klaxons going off in your head. She going to be more trouble and aggravation than it's worth, I've seen the type, I've experienced the type and bro it's not worth it. I know people have baggage, but this is cargo.
I think a quick discussion regarding your logic would show her your side of things. Like the fact that you were kind of hosting the party and couldn't just leave, or that you couldn't get a ride over there (and therefore didn't call)... if she can't accept/reason through the truth on this one, there's problems. If she still thinks you're in the wrong here, I have a feeling this will be a recurring problem. As far as you not calling her in the past, that may have been resolved, but if she was upset that would still fuel her rage. I can see both sides of things, so it's understandable that she was initially upset, but after talking things out with her I think it should be pretty clear that you were in the right. Regarding her calling you doll, not sure how I feel about that one. Kind of seems like the kind of thing a guy would say to a girl and not the other way around, but that's y'all's business and not mine.
kimchicowboy
03-29-2004, 04:35 AM
Originally posted by yippiekiyeh
Ski ugh... she's got more drama than anything. Don't sink to her level bro. You should be having red flags/sirens/klaxons going off in your head. She going to be more trouble and aggravation than it's worth, I've seen the type, I've experienced the type and bro it's not worth it. I know people have baggage, but this is cargo.
:stupid:
communication is key. if she ain't willing to communicate thoughts and stuff, forget about her.
molecularfire
03-29-2004, 06:30 AM
Seems kinda like a weird way to preface a break up speech so either 1) she isn't as serious about this as you are or 2) she really does just want to talk. If it's the former, then you're better off without her. If it's the latter, then just wait and hear what she has to say. Maybe she's just scared and trying to hide it. Either ways, good luck man. Been there... it sucks.
Lolita
03-29-2004, 07:26 AM
I don't think you were in the wrong, since she knew you were having a party and couldn't just leave, but just for the future keep in mind that the girl would rather get one too many phone calls then one too little. I mean don't call every ten minutes to let her know that you're alive but if, for example, you see that you can't leave the party on time just give her a call and say it - it's less of an inconvenience than those "talks" she wants to have ;)
nickel
03-29-2004, 07:48 AM
Originally posted by DarkFury
Basically, women like this have ISSUES (and subscriptions perhaps...), and honestly, run NOW unless she has something going for her where you can overlook this deficiency.
Hell, I wish someone had told ME to run when I had the chance... the signs were all there but obviously I wasn't payin' attention to them.
sounds like a case of being pussy whipped.
you don't look beyond the poontang
nickel
03-29-2004, 08:31 AM
Originally posted by DarkFury
Oh so you gonna go there...
Trust me, it wasn't the "P" that got me on lock... it's what came out of the "P". :hmm:
aw c'mon we all know the "C" was hot for the "P"
and that's how it all happened
mcs328
03-29-2004, 11:32 AM
so was this out of town guest male or female? related or unrelated? The empty beer bottles and the overnight guest would be a sign of something amist(sp?)
Jihforce
03-29-2004, 11:40 AM
I think that woman's got issues Ski. As many of here have addressed, she's too dramatic, and it'll get worse from this point on.
Airencracken
03-29-2004, 12:15 PM
Hit it and quit it.
nickel
03-29-2004, 12:25 PM
Originally posted by DarkFury
Are we talkin' about the same "P" here? :shrug: :hmm:
pussy? yeh?
i am saying guys get pussywhipped and overlook the real personality behind the spread.
oblongmelon
03-29-2004, 02:37 PM
Originally posted by DarkFury
Basically, women like this have ISSUES (and subscriptions perhaps...),
and maybe PRESCRIPTIONS as well...I agree with DF..run RUN RUN..RUN LIKE FOREST GUMP..NEVER LOOK BACK.
yo yo yo! actually she does have prescriptions. Heck, I have them too. We're just a bunch of nuts. ANYWHO
She brought it up that we should break it off for the moment, since I'm so preoccupied with work (I agree on this). Here's the FCUKED UP part... 30 minutes after we have this conversation, we're walking to dinner, and she's on the phone talking to someone...
"Well you're going to have to change if you want to be with me... Do you like me? Don't just say it because you think that's what I want to hear, and know that I may not say the same thing back, just tell me if you still like me..."
:confused: <--- me ... I was thinking "WTF! huhhhh, who's this guy?" I still haven't found out. VERY shady :shifty:
yippiekiyeh
03-29-2004, 07:15 PM
Originally posted by DarkFury
Hell, I wish someone had told ME to run when I had the chance... the signs were all there but obviously I wasn't payin' attention to them.
Bruthaman you didn't post on G|A :P . But way to go on being da Man! :thumbup:
oblongmelon
03-29-2004, 07:17 PM
um..ok and you still kept walking with her? woa-do we need to have a "talk"? ...DUMP HER
yippiekiyeh
03-29-2004, 07:18 PM
Originally posted by skiAtomic
"Well you're going to have to change if you want to be with me... Do you like me? Don't just say it because you think that's what I want to hear, and know that I may not say the same thing back, just tell me if you still like me..."
:confused: <--- me ... I was thinking "WTF! huhhhh, who's this guy?" I still haven't found out. VERY shady :shifty:
This is the REDFLAG I'm talking about. Friend okay, but not girlfriend bro, this path is only going to lead to frustration and hurt. Get out now!
Jihforce
03-29-2004, 07:31 PM
Originally posted by skiAtomic
:confused: <--- me ... I was thinking "WTF! huhhhh, who's this guy?" I still haven't found out. VERY shady :shifty:
How about you don't find out and just tell her to hug a cactus or something. She's just toying you bro. Let it go man. No "p" is worth this bullcrap. We can only tell you what we thing its best, but you gotta do it yourself. Have some self respect and just drop her like a bad habit.
DankNstickY
03-29-2004, 11:23 PM
:stupid: i'm with the last 3's posts. at this point i would have just let her keep walking, while i turn around and walk back to my car and 'see ya'. "do you like"??? wtf... who talks about this with their friend from gym class... that was definitely some other guy. things definitely not right.
just split. too much drama over nothing.
zenbooty
03-30-2004, 05:14 AM
Originally posted by Airencracken
Hit it and quit it. That's my line. I'll be waiting for my royalty check.
nickel
03-30-2004, 05:33 AM
that line sucks
you should wear it on a T-shirt and see how many chicks even give you a second look. :P
zenbooty
03-30-2004, 06:21 AM
Originally posted by nickelback
that line sucks
you should wear it on a T-shirt and see how many chicks even give you a second look. :P Oh please. If girls had to wear what they were really thinking on their shirts, I'm sure most guys would wind up gay. :P
Jihforce
03-30-2004, 10:21 AM
Originally posted by nickelback
that line sucks
you should wear it on a T-shirt and see how many chicks even give you a second look. :P
Yeah, I'm sure "Boys are stupid, throw rocks at them" is a much better line. :hmm:
mcs328
03-30-2004, 10:23 AM
Uhmm...yeah. That's insulting to you and you should drop her. You are getting played. Don't just walk away, run!!
Originally posted by skiAtomic
yo yo yo! actually she does have prescriptions. Heck, I have them too. We're just a bunch of nuts. ANYWHO
She brought it up that we should break it off for the moment, since I'm so preoccupied with work (I agree on this). Here's the FCUKED UP part... 30 minutes after we have this conversation, we're walking to dinner, and she's on the phone talking to someone...
"Well you're going to have to change if you want to be with me... Do you like me? Don't just say it because you think that's what I want to hear, and know that I may not say the same thing back, just tell me if you still like me..."
:confused: <--- me ... I was thinking "WTF! huhhhh, who's this guy?" I still haven't found out. VERY shady :shifty:
ditch the b**** so not worth your effort.
nickel
03-30-2004, 10:59 AM
Originally posted by Jihforce
Yeah, I'm sure "Boys are stupid, throw rocks at them" is a much better line. :hmm:
no....i was thinking more like, "girls rule, boys drool" :P
Originally posted by DarkFury
Heh... what about...
"Girls suck and the guys appreciate it." :hihi:
:heh:
i DID get away... that happened after we agreed to drop things between us. Plus, a free meal for me was worth putting up with that :P She's not worth my time anywmore, good riddance I say :)
Kevster
03-30-2004, 01:31 PM
Originally posted by skiAtomic
i DID get away...
She's not worth my time anywmore, good riddance I say :)
That goodness for that!
You know, I heard that Obby's becoming available... :P
CuzimRoysMom
03-30-2004, 04:52 PM
'ditch the bitch' end of story...
Originally posted by Kevster
That goodness for that!
You know, I heard that Obby's becoming available... :P
She sent me a good, long PM about it after it happened... screw the age difference, as long as she's loyal and can cook ;) kidding!
ugotcarrie
03-31-2004, 07:09 PM
The neediness/witchynees she showed in your first post was classic PmS.
With your next girl plan to STAY AWAY, bite your tongue, or ignore her, every 3 to 4 weeks, BECAUSE a girl with PmS can love you for 3 weeks out of every month and on the 4th week wonder what she EVER saw in you. :( When those hormones subside, she will love you again and wonder WHY she EVER though that?!?!?! It's crazy and it sux, so for your own self preservation either time your escapes or find one with out bad PmS!
Originally posted by ugotcarrie
With your next girl plan to STAY AWAY, bite your tongue, or ignore her, every week
:stupid:
girls are dumb, throw rocks at them :P
She b*tched me out over nothing tonight on the phone.
her: "Do you still like me?"
WTF am I supposed to say!! She wanted to break up for a while, of course I'm thinking about it... uggh, all I heard was "well have a good weekend, bye" ... total overreaction. I wish she weren't so emotional about it, she's a cool girl, but you have to be on her good side to see that.
Jihforce
03-31-2004, 09:00 PM
Originally posted by skiAtomic
She b*tched me out over nothing tonight on the phone.
her: "Do you still like me?"
WTF am I supposed to say!! She wanted to break up for a while, of course I'm thinking about it... uggh, all I heard was "well have a good weekend, bye" ... total overreaction. I wish she weren't so emotional about it, she's a cool girl, but you have to be on her good side to see that.
She should go see a shrink. She's got some serious psychological issues. Why do u put up with all this circus acts? don't you get tired?
Originally posted by skiAtomic
She b*tched me out over nothing tonight on the phone.
her: "Do you still like me?"
WTF am I supposed to say!! She wanted to break up for a while, of course I'm thinking about it... uggh, all I heard was "well have a good weekend, bye" ... total overreaction. I wish she weren't so emotional about it, she's a cool girl, but you have to be on her good side to see that.
you should go out, and have meaningless sex with her really hot friend, that will tell her what you think. ;)
TofuNinja
03-31-2004, 10:19 PM
like everyone is saying... turn your back on her and never ever look back.....
CuzimRoysMom
04-01-2004, 06:05 AM
Originally posted by DarkFury
PMS still equals... Pretty Mean Sista.
BELIEVE THAT! :2far:
PMS were my Mom's initials...lol
TERRIBLETOM
04-01-2004, 06:17 AM
She sounds like a sociopath... :shifty:
Originally posted by TERRIBLETOM
She sounds like a sociopath... :shifty:
dude... i didn't know what sociopath means, but I looked it up:
http://home.datawest.net/esn-recovery/artcls/socio.htm
It's totally her :eek:
Promiscuous sexual behavior, grandiose view of self... wow
DankNstickY
04-06-2004, 12:32 AM
so.... did you ditch the bitch?
Airencracken
04-06-2004, 12:10 PM
hit it and quit it. I"ll say it again.
Originally posted by DarkFury
Honestly, with this type of girl... "hittin' it" probably can get you into MORE trouble than you're willing to deal with.
Just quit it and forget it I'd say... :2far:
syphillis... the gift that keeps on giving :hihi:
Kevster
04-07-2004, 01:27 PM
Originally posted by DarkFury
Honestly, with this type of girl... "hittin' it" probably can get you into MORE trouble than you're willing to deal with.
Just quit it and forget it I'd say... :2far:
Didn't they make a movie (http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/FatalAttraction-1007141/) about women like that?
Didn't they make a movie (http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/FatalAttraction-1007141/) about women like that?
This one and Swimfan... but that movie's definitely not a must-see :P
I ditched her, just wish I could get away from the infatuations/relationships thing for a while... I can't get a break
brainsmile
04-09-2004, 12:49 PM
the guy is always wrong in the girls mind. :)
Airencracken
04-09-2004, 02:38 PM
the guy is always wrong in the girls mind. :)
Thank goodness not with my gf. :cool:
yippiekiyeh
04-10-2004, 03:47 AM
syphillis... the gift that keeps on giving :hihi:
More like Herpes! *ahem*
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