Help????

[pain2010]

How do you ever fall out of love with someone you been with for more than 10 years? All you can do is think about is how to have come back to you. Your kids want her back with you. All she wants is time apart and you cant even do that becase it hurts so much with out her. What do i do? What do i do?
You feel like your all ready dead in side and that you cant and never want to love anyone else. You try to help her and she doesnt listen to you at all. If their is a way for me to be with her i would do it. I would do what ever it takes so we can be a family again. What do i do??? What do i do??

[oblongmelon]

move on...when it's over it's over...

[Ladogaboy]

Walk away.











Obviously not from your children and your responsibilities, but you MUST walk away from her. As far as you should be concerned, she is no longer a part of your life. If you have to, look at her as though she had died. What can you do about it? Nothing. Mourn your loss and move on.

From the sounds of it, she is the one that called it quits, which means she is the one that needs to re-initiate anything, if there ever will be anything. All you can and should do is go on with your life... focus on your children, your job, anything but her.

I went through a similar situation with my ex, though, I'll have to admit, there are no kids or any ties that couldn't be broken. The best we had were friends in common, and even then, they aren't good or constant friends on either end. We were together for 3 years... the happiest 3 years of my life--I experienced more love and gave out more of my heart than I have in the rest of my life--, and she and I were best friends for the entire time. I'm not sure what I could have done differently, but what I do know is this: if her and my friendship/relationship were meant to be after the fact, it would have happened. Nothing can come from you forcing the issue. I tried, and now I haven't even spoken to my ex in almost 6 months.

The two suggestions I'll leave you with are these: One, give it time. You don't have to completely forget her, and you don't even have to stop loving her, but you do have to give up your expectations of here... i.e. her loving you. Two, this is a suggestion a really hot guy in a gay bar in San Francisco gave me shortly after my break-up, don't listen to the radio... you'll hear ever broken-hearted love song ever written, over, and over, and over again. Olaf was right.

[pain2010]

If it was easy i would walk away. I cant when she tells my kids she loves me.

[Ladogaboy]

My ex loved me when she broke it off. Hell, she probably still loves me today. All the more reason to keep your distance.

[nickel]

pain2010 reminds me of another user.....can't remember his name, but he had the same thing going on.

have the two of you tried counseling?

[pain2010]

I have asked to go but she will not. Their are to many things going on that kepts telling not to stop. Right now i cant, i think she is pregant.

[DarkFury]

I have asked to go but she will not. Their are to many things going on that kepts telling not to stop. Right now i cant, i think she is pregant.
Dayuum... been there, done that... still doing that. Still kinda miserable at times... :shrug: