Ethnic Joke

[DaFunkyUnit]

No offense intended.


Q: What did the Mexican say when the roof collapsed on him?
A: Get off me, homes!!!

[jonEwantsM3]

Good one! :thumbup:

[Memo]

I'll give it to Mexican Stamp of Approval! :bandit:

[DarkFury]

Good one...

I personally shall refrain from making any "Mexican" jokes... :D

[brainsmile]

:hihi:

[brain]

What did the Mexican say when the wind blew his research paper away?

Come back here essay!

[Airencracken]

What do you call a mexican with one leg.

Not even.

[hoey222]

What kind of cans are there in Mexico?
Mexicans.

[Dirty Sanchez]

What do you call 4 mexicans in quicksand?

Quatro Cinco

[Airencracken]

I want white people jokes. Never hear 'em. :(

[DaFunkyUnit]

I want white people jokes. Never hear 'em. :(

thats because they're walking punchlines.

ba-zing!

/me runs away!

[blueindian]

I want white people jokes. Never hear 'em. :(

What does a white guy see when he looks at his family tree?
A straight line!


What do you call a White man with a sheep under each arm?
A Pimp.

How many white girls does it take to screw in a light?
None, white girls can't screw

I don't know if this one is a white folk or black folk joke, but it's funny either way...

A young black boy goes into the kitchen where his mother is baking. He puts his hands in the flour and coats his face with it. He looks at his mother and says, "Look momma...I'm a white boy."

His mama slaps him hard on the face and says, "Boy go show your daddy."

The boy goes into the living room and says, "Look Daddy, I'm a white boy."

His daddy slaps him on the face too and says, "Boy, go show your grandma."

So the boy goes to see his grandma and says, "Look Granny, I'm a white boy."

She slaps him on the face and sends him back to his mother. His mother says, "well, did you learn something from all of this?"

The boy shakes his head and says, "I sure nuff did. I've only been a white boy for a five minutes and I already hate you black people."

[bachviet]

Those are pretty funny. :laugh:

[molecularfire]

To further contribute to the deterioration of ethnic tolerance on this board, here are a couple of mine.

Q: Why doesn't Mexico have a good olympic team
A: Because everyone that can run, jump or swim is already in the U.S.

Q: What's an asian woman's favorite soup
A: Cream of some young guy

[Memo]

What do you call a mexican with one leg.

Not even.


I don't get it?

[redcolours]

Good one...

I personally shall refrain from making any "Mexican" jokes... :D cuz yer a mexican't? :P

[RoniMan]

well, since people are contributing to this.....

why did so many black soldiers die in vietnam war?

--b/c everytime the sergeant yelled "get down", they would get up and dance...

[DarkFury]

cuz yer a mexican't? :P
:hmm:

:2far:


Ok... y'all... don't get the smack down laid on ya for clownin' around. :hmm:

[Merlin]

I love ethnic jokes. This is a great thread. Keep'em coming and no getting offended anyone.

[blueindian]

what do you call a mexican baptism?
bean dip.


what's white and 14 inches long?
absolutly nothing.


Dead Hick
Emily Sue passed away and Billy-Bob called 911. The 911 Operator told Billy-Bob that she would send someone out right away.

"Where do you live?" asked the operator.

Billy-Bob replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive."

The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me?"

There was a long pause and finally Billy-Bob said, "How 'bout if I drag her over to Oak Street and you pick her up there?"

[jstreet]

Gotta add the gay jokes in, come on now :D

What do you call 50 lesbians and 50 goverment employees in one room?
100 people that don't do d-ck!

Two Gays are standing on a bridge watching ships pass by underneath them.
One says to the other..."What kind of ship is that?" "Container ship."
"OK, what''s that one over there?" "Oil Tanker."
"How about that one?" "That''s a ferry boat."
"Really? I knew we were strong, but I never knew we had our own NAVY!"

[Booyamos]

ha ha ha

Come back here essay! lol that is great

Gotta love bad ethnic jokes :)

[zenbooty]

Does no one remember all the various polish (pollock) jokes of yore. I grew up on those!

Q: How do you get a one-armed pollock out of a tree?
A: Wave.

Q: Why did the 2nd Polish Navy put glass bottoms on all of their boats?
A: So they could see the 1st Polish Navy

Q: What is the greatest Polish invention?
A: The solar powered flashlight.


An American, a Russian, and a Pollock were all captured by German forces, and sentenced to execution by firing squad. First they stood up the American. The Commandant shouted, "Ready, Aim....," at which point the American soldier pointed behind the soldiers with a look of panic and screamed, "TORNADO!!!" The Germans quickly fled, and the American escaped.
Next came the Russian. He was stood up, and the commandant shouted, "Ready, Aim...," and the Russian quickly screamed "HURRICANE!!!" and all the Germans once again fled, and the Russian escaped.
Finally it was the Pollock's turn. The commandant shouted, "Ready, Aim..."
And then the Pollock screamed "FIRE!!!"


Q: A white man, a black man, and a Pollock are all dropped from the same height. Who hits the ground first?
A: The white man. The black man would stop to draw graffitti on the plane he was thrown out of, and the Pollock would get lost on the way down.


And finally: (for now)

An American, an Indian, and a Pollock were on a secret mission in enemy territory. Complications had arisen, delaying their mission. As a result, they found themselves out of food and needing to resupply. Luckily, nearby was a cheese factory. So they planned out a strategy to break into the factory at night, separate, steal what they could, and reconnoiter later outside the factory.
After the mission was completed and the team rendezvoused, they went over their gains. They asked the Indian, "what kind of cheese did you get?"
The Indian replied, "I've got american cheese."
"How do you know its American?"
"Well, I've had American cheese before, and it looks, smells, and tastes just like it."
Then they asked the American, "What kind of cheese did you get?"
"I got swiss cheese."
"How do you know its swiss?"
"Well, its kinda nutty and is full of holes."
Finally they asked the Pollock, "What kind of cheese did you get?"
"I got nacho cheese!"
"How do you know?"
"Well, after I grabbed it, these two black guards saw me, and started chasing me yelling, 'That's nacho cheese! That's nacho cheese!"


Ooh, one more oldy but goody. Since I've managed to denigrate everyone else, I may as well be fair and poke fun of my own heritage (I'll leave the French alone. French jokes are in vogue these days).

Q: What's does an Irish 7-course meal consist of?
A: A six-pack of Guinness and a boiled potato.

[oblongmelon]

Hey us Italians are feeling left out...

Why do Italians hate Jehovah's Witnesses?

Because Italians hate all witnesses.

[zenbooty]

Hey us Italians are feeling left out...

Why do Italians hate Jehovah's Witnesses?

Because Italians hate all witnesses.Ooh, another oldy but goody:

Q: Why don't any Italians have freckles?
A: Because they just slide right off.

[Jenny]

Hahahaha I like obby's. funny stuff!

[Cheesypuff]

Here you guys go...need some asian jokes up in this...


How do asians name their kids?
They throw change on the floor

How do asians look at tall buildings?
They turn their head sideways

[blueindian]

They throw change on the floor



i always heard throw the pots and pans on the floor.

[cheapie]

Why were there only 2,000 Mexicans at the Alamo?

They only had 5 cars.


oak drive joke

http://www.amiganiac.net/gfx/orange/laugh.gif

[RoniMan]

what's white and 14 inches long?
absolutly nothing.

i usually tell it this way....

what do you call an asian guy with a 14in schlong?
Lucky
what do you call a black guy with 14in schlong?
Shorty
what do you call a white guy with a 14in schlong?
LIAR!!!

[Jenny]

Here you guys go...need some asian jokes up in this...


How do asians name their kids?
They throw change on the floor

How do asians look at tall buildings?
They turn their head sideways

Call me stupid... I don't get either one of them. :(

[Nija]

Call me stupid... I don't get either one of them. :(

:lmfao:

Think of some asian names that sound like sounds of pots or change hitting the ground

Ching
Chang
Chong
chow
zing
etc.

the sideways one is a dig at the slanted eyes...

[RoniMan]

Call me stupid... I don't get either one of them. :(

did the reply button replace the quote button?

any ways,

1) b/c a lot of chinese ppl's names pronounced phonetically sound like either change dropping, or pot clanging.

(for example, my chinese name is ChiChung, granted, none of it sounds like anything above, but .... it's a joke.)

2) it's the fact that some asians have narrow eyes, so they have to turn their head sideways....

edit: damn nija, beat me to the punch...

[Cheesypuff]

Yeah...good explantions...

My chinese name does not sound anything like pots or change...but it's still funny

[Airencracken]

To further contribute to the deterioration of ethnic tolerance on this board, here are a couple of mine.

Q: Why doesn't Mexico have a good olympic team
A: Because everyone that can run, jump or swim is already in the U.S.

Q: What's an asian woman's favorite soup
A: Cream of some young guy

Dude, it's funnier if you put it in psedo asian text like

Cream of sum yuong gai.

What do you call a pretty lady in poland.

A tourist.

What did the asian family name their retarded child?

Som Ting Wong

Why do mexican's drive low riders?

To pick strawberries faster.

There's a black guy and a mexican guy in a car who's driving?

The police officer.

How many irish people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the light bulb the other to get so drunk the room spins

Blonde Joke

Why was the blonde's belly button sore?

She has a blonde boyfriend.

[cheapie]

Blonde Joke

Why was the blonde's belly button sore?

She has a blonde boyfriend.

or she could be this person (http://www.gotapex.com/forums/showpost.php?p=680024&postcount=9)

[StonedWheat]

Alright I got one -
What do you call 2 mexican guys playing basketball?
Juan on Juan

[Burzhui]

Hey us Italians are feeling left out...

Why do Italians hate Jehovah's Witnesses?

Because Italians hate all witnesses.


i love it... it's fabulous and so are the first 2 mexican joke with the homes and essay :lol:


i usually tell it this way....

what do you call an asian guy with a 14in schlong?
Lucky
what do you call a black guy with 14in schlong?
Shorty
what do you call a white guy with a 14in schlong?
LIAR!!!


i always heard this one with the asian guy being the liar

[oblongmelon]

Ooh, another oldy but goody:

Q: Why don't any Italians have freckles?
A: Because they just slide right off.

hahahaha...I loved this one so much I sent it to one of my brothers and he sent it to the other four with a note added "Do I amuse you? Do "I" amuse you????"....they all cracked up

[DankNstickY]

I don't get it?

a lot of mexicans, or just hispanics in general, tend to say 'not even!' in place of 'no way' or something like that. never heard it??? i think u have... just couldnt put 2 and 2 together. heh. i called u dumb.

[eSDee]

I'll admit I am a little sensitive when people of other ethicities make jokes of mine. I don't think I am hypersensitive but I do remember when one time my sister and I were having a beer or 5 at a bar in LA. The bartender (white guy) decided it would be a great time to throw this gem at us:

Bartender: "What did Jesus say to the Mexicans when he rose up to heaven?"

Us: "What?"

Bartender: "Don't do anything until I get back"

:shifty: :hmm: :shrug:

[molecularfire]

Q: How many italians does it take to wax a car
A: Depends on how hard you hit them.

Q: What do you call a chinese test tube baby
A: No fun son