Girlfriend goes back to school tomorrow

[gwilks98]

We've been dating since April of 03 and we were friends for 2 years before that. Even though this'll be the 2nd school year going through a LDR with her, we're still afraid we're going to have a hard time coping. We worked together for the past three summers so I'm used to seeing her every day. (We even live only 2 miles apart.) I helped her pick out a webcam tonight but it's just not gonna be the same.

The 10 hr drive is bad but tolerable for now, but I'm really dreading graduation day when she applies for jobs out in LA, SF, NY, etc.

Anyone else doing the long distance thing?

[Jenny]

So why not join her? What's keeping you where you are?

[HmpDeeHmp]

Just make sure that she lands a phat job and can take care of you so that you can move out to wherever she is and have her be the breadwinner... Sugar momma's rock!!! :thumbup:

[cheapie]

uh...webcam? are we going to be seeing her on kazaa anytime soon?

[nickel]

webcams r fun

but i know why he got her one - it's nice to see a picture move a bit, makes for a bit of reality.

[Merlin]

uh...webcam? are we going to be seeing her on kazaa anytime soon?
The ground is laid for another American Pie moment.

[molecularfire]

LDRs are hard no doubt about it... depending on the people involved, it might not even be possible although since you guys have gone through a year already, the odds are pretty decent for you guys. If possible, I would say don't be in one (i.e. move to where she is if there is nothing keeping you where you are at). If it is necessary, you're just going to have to put in tons of effort, be as understanding as you can, and pray for the best. Been in an LDR for a little over four years and personally, I don't envy you, but if she's worth it, then it is worth it. Good luck. :)

[gwilks98]

So why not join her? What's keeping you where you are?

It wouldn't be exactly great for my career to move to college town alabama where there are no IT jobs. I may decide to move with her when she graduates if she doesn't come back to StL, but that's another 9 months away.

I also wanted to buy a house. No sense in doing that if I'm going to move in a year.

<shrug>

[LegendKiller]

I met my fiance online since we both went to the Univ of MN, we talked a whole summer online and then met our sophomore year. Every summer after that we spent apart until last summer (03). Summer before Junior, before senior, after senior, 4 summers we spent apart. 12 months out of 71 we have been dating.

Its damn hard, but you can make it through. Just keep talking to her, reassure her that you love her and it can and will work out.


You just need to make sure that you will eventually end up together.


LK

[Jihforce]

definitely hard, but not impossible. Personal experience tho, it didn't work out for me.
however, we ended up dating again and got married afterwards. So you never know :D

[rajatQ2]

I tried a long distance relationship for a while, (summer-time ldr, 3 summers, over 2.5 years) and unfortunately it didn't work out. It was more the girl, rather than the distance, that drove me away.

Here is a great quote, that I actually got from that same chick.

Relationships -- of all kinds -- are like sand held in your hand. Held loosely, with an open hand, the sand remains where it is. The minute you close your hand and squeeze tightly to hold on, the sand trickles through your fingers. You may hold on to some of it, but most will be spilled. A relationship is like that. Held loosely, with respect and freedom for the other person, it is likely to remain intact. But hold too tightly, too possessively, and the relationship slips away and is lost. -- Kaleel Jamison

[whitak24]

i know how you feel, man. it's tough. i've been in an LDR for the past 6 years (although we got to spend the first couple summers in the same town), and leaving when you've spent some time together is always really tough.

look at it as something you have to do for the next nine months and then you can decide where to go from there.

good luck.

[cheapie]

your sig is misspelled so i can't really respect anything you say whit

[BrewMaster]

gwilks98,

i was in a LDR for 2 years. I mean real long distance. She was in Turkey and I was in LA. We dated for 2 years before that and then had those 2 years apart while she was studying in Turkey. I would no wish this on my worst enemy. But I would not have traded it for anything. We both grew up as people and we needed to do it apart from each other. With the 10 hour time difference between here and Turkey, and the cost of a phone call, we talked only twice a week for about an hour and emailed all the time. But my girl was worth it. Now she's home and we're engaged.

So cherish these next 9 months to grow and learn about yourself. Treat her well. Send her flowers and little gifts. Let her know you are thinking about her a lot. Be real with how hard it is to be apart and tell her that. As said above, if she's worth it, you'll make it work. You may want to see if you can get a flight on Southwest or something to go see her to save some driving. They have a decent frequent flyer program too. Good luck man. Thanks for sharing with us.

[Grubbie]

I feel your pain man, my gf is in seattle, I am in boston for my 4th year of college. We have been going out for 5.5years. It is hard when you get to spend 2-3 weeks with them , and then you have to leave.

[gwilks98]

Thanks guys...10hr drive is a heck of a lot better than her being in Turkey.

I get to go see her in two weeks though for an entire week. While I'm there, I'll probably go see Auburn play the Citadel (my 2nd college football game.)
So it'll be a good time. The hard thing is trying to figure out how to grow without her. I've already decided that on October 1st, I'm starting back up my ninjutsu/jujutsu training. Or maybe I'll learn how to not dance like a white guy. :shrug:

[gwilks98]

I don't know if anyone remembers this thread, but....

Holy crap! She took a job in Saint Louis! (And at the same company that I work for)Come May, the long distance will be over.

Finally, a real relationship where we see each other every day and get to whine about who's turn it is to pick out the movie.
Now, I just have to be patient these last 2 months...

[kimchicowboy]

good stuff dude! see how perserverence pays off? :)

[Jenny]

Yay! Congrats! :) That's great :)

[coins]

YAY

[nickel]

hey coins.... how you doin?

[molecularfire]

Who are you and why you so happy gwilks got his girl back? :hmm:




btw gwilks, belated congrats. :cheers:

[Hiro]

I don't know if anyone remembers this thread, but....

Holy crap! She took a job in Saint Louis! (And at the same company that I work for)Come May, the long distance will be over.

Finally, a real relationship where we see each other every day and get to whine about who's turn it is to pick out the movie.
Now, I just have to be patient these last 2 months...
Congrats.

[BrewMaster]

that's excellent news gwilks98. now you will appreciate how much it means to be with her since you had to live without her for a while.

[TofuNinja]

woot wtg man that is super cool. You did it! You really did it!!!! Now go whine about your movies

[gwilks98]

Now go whine about your movies


:spock: er...I get to keep those.

[TofuNinja]

I don't know if anyone remembers this thread, but....

Holy crap! She took a job in Saint Louis! (And at the same company that I work for)Come May, the long distance will be over.

Finally, a real relationship where we see each other every day and get to whine about who's turn it is to pick out the movie.
Now, I just have to be patient these last 2 months...

I know ;)