Why Do Some Successful Women Pick Losers?

[johnnymk]

I was at ChiChi's last night for Karaoke. I saw this very attractive woman who I have seen for years with SuperCreep. He is fairly good looking, but is a total loser. I won't go into the details why he is a loser, but it is common knowledge that he is.

I have seen this trend too often with some very sharp girls who pick lazy, abusive guys and I am clueless why they do it.

[Merlin]

Maybe his friends call him "horse" for a reason? :shrug:

[oblongmelon]

how do you know he's abusive? and lazy? do you know him personally? It may not be the way he treats her at home..some "great" guys out in public are the biggest a-holes in private...and maybe she's very sharp in public but a total bitch and a slob in private..who knows..
are you still going to that karaoke? AND do you get up and sing? *has visuals of Johnny singing a bad version of FEELINGS*..

[caribiner23]

You can also ask the opposite-- why decent guys wind up with controlling, nasty women.

The truth is that people get into relationships for a lot of reasons. Sometimes they're looking for something that's missing in their lives and are willing to put up with the bad to get what they're looking for, other times it's something as basic as money or sex. A lot of times it's one of a thousands types of self-esteem problems.

We could spend hours going into the psychology behind this, but I'm not up to the task. :)

I have a friend who's had a string of bad relationships and she keeps going back into the same spiral. She's in her mid-30s, very attractive, and pretty successful. Two weeks ago we had this conversation:

Caribiner23: How's everything else going?
Theresa: Well, I was back with Dan for a few weeks.
C: Dan, your ex-husband?
T: Yeah. I really missed him.
C: Dan, the guy you divorced because he hit you and locked you in a closet when he got mad at you?
T: Yeah.
C: Why?
T: I just feel that, I dunno, that he was the right one for me.
C: So where is he now?
T: He's got some things to take care of.
C: What do you mean?
T: He's back with his wife.
C: Were they divorced?
T: Oh, no. He just moved out for a couple weeks and stayed here.

Sadly, it reminded me of this 1980s Saturday Night Live skit. Phil Hartman is Phil Donahue, Jan Hooks is Phyllis:

--
Phil Donahue: Phyllis Sykes, you've had a number of degrading relationships. Your last boyfriend got drunk, totaled your car with you in it which left you in intensive care for over a year and during your painful convalescence, he never visited you, he withdrew your life savings, spent the money on other women, held orgies in your apartment, got you evicted, and yet I understand you're still live with this man.
Phyllis Sykes: Well you'd really have to meet him. He's like a bad little boy, he looks at me with these big puppy dog eyes. I can't stay mad at him.
Phil Donahue: Now he sold you to an Iraqi business man?
Phyllis Sykes: Yes he did. But his landscaping business was faltering and we needed the money, and David never meant for it to be permanent.
--

The fact of the matter is, if I knew the answer to this, I'd be wealthier than Dr. Phil.

[johnnymk]

how do you know he's abusive? and lazy? do you know him personally? It may not be the way he treats her at home..some "great" guys out in public are the biggest a-holes in private...and maybe she's very sharp in public but a total bitch and a slob in private..who knows..
are you still going to that karaoke? AND do you get up and sing? *has visuals of Johnny singing a bad version of FEELINGS*..

First of all, he has been in jail, but I am not going to hold that against him. Secondly, a few years ago, he got a girl pregnant, married her and was back at the Karaoke scene alone within 6 months.
Third, his friends are scumbags.
Fourth, I know the guy who used to date this girl who knows that he starts fights and is abusive.
Fifth, his former girlfriends and friends state the same pattern with him.

And the song "Feelings" :puke:

I do mostly soul songs by Smokey Robinson, the Temptations, the Delphonics, the Stylistics, Marvin Gaye, Luther vanDross, the Commodores, plus Hall and Oates, Billy Joel, the Eagles and many many others.

I get lots of praise for my singing wherever I go. Plus it's easier singing Karaoke than being in a band, which involves a lot of work for questionable rewards. But that's just my opinion.

[kimchicowboy]

karaoke is fun! the next time in LA, we should have a G|A get-together at karaoke! hahaha

[cheapie]

getting me onstage to sing would have to involve copious amounts of alcohol!

[InfiniteNothing]

karaoke is fun! the next time in LA, we should have a G|A get-together at karaoke! hahahaOh yeah!
:sing: Did you ever know that you're my heeeeeeeroooooo

[johnnymk]

getting me onstage to sing would have to involve copious amounts of alcohol!

The very first time I did it 12 years ago I had 4 drinks in a very short time. I could just about see the TV I was so drunk. But once you do it and get lots of applause, you can easily get addicted.

[nickel]

Maybe his friends call him "horse" for a reason? :shrug:
:laugh: yeh what he said

----------------------------------------

getting me onstage to sing would have to involve copious amounts of alcohol!
i would pay LOTS OF MONEY to see that. how much would it take cheapie? huh? huh? HUH? :D

[Kevster]

karaoke is fun! the next time in LA, we should have a G|A get-together at karaoke! hahaha

Every time I have gone karaoke I usually end up singing pub songs (usually with my Irish, English or Australian co-workers). I garnered some new respect from them for already knowing the words to "Waltzing Matilda" and singing it from memory. :D

[nickel]

Every time I have gone karaoke I usually end up singing pub songs (usually with my Irish, English or Australian co-workers). I garnered some new respect from them for already knowing the words to "Waltzing Matilda" and singing it from memory. :D
how Irish are you Kevster? ever heard of the song, "bugger off"?
now there is a karaoke song to beat all karaoke songs :D

[Merlin]

I garnered some new respect from them for already knowing the words to "Waltzing Matilda" and singing it from memory. :D
:lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao: The REAL Aussie national anthem. Those folks will look for any excuse to sing that song. When I was down under last year for the World Cup, the popular bet between the Brits and the Aussies was the losing side had to sing either Waltzing Matilda or God Save the Queen. I laughed for weeks!

[oblongmelon]

how Irish are you Kevster? ever heard of the song, "bugger off"?
now there is a karaoke song to beat all karaoke songs :D

You bastards buggar off F*CK YOU!!!!
WHAT A CATCHY TUNE..lol my best friend plays that constantly whenever we go anywhere in her car...(she's irish)

[redcolours]

getting me onstage to sing would have to involve copious amounts of alcohol!
yep!

here, here!

:cheers:

:sing:

[Kevster]

how Irish are you Kevster? ever heard of the song, "bugger off"?
now there is a karaoke song to beat all karaoke songs :D

:heh: I know all the words to that one too.

I'm Irish enough to have a green passport with a Harp on the front of it. :D

[Merlin]

...for already knowing the words to "Waltzing Matilda" and singing it from memory. :D



Waltzing Matilda

Once a jolly swagman camped by a billabong,
Under the shade of a Coolibah tree,
And he sang as he watched and waited till his billy boil,
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me.

Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda,
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me,
And he sang as he watched and waited till his billy boil
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me.

....................

Down came a jumbuck to drink at that billabong
Up jumped the swagman and grabbed him with glee,
And he sang as he shoved that jumbuck in his tucker bag
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me.

Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda,
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me,
And he sang as he shoved that jumbuck in his tucker bag
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me.

.....................

Up rode the squatter mounted on his thorough-bred
Down came the troopers One Two Three
Whose that jolly jumbuck you've got in your tucker bag
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me.

Waltzing Matilda Waltzing Matilda
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me
Whose that jolly jumbuck you've got in your tucker-bag
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me.

......................

Up jumped the swagman sprang in to the billabong
You'll never catch me alive said he,
And his ghost may be heard as you pass by that billabong
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me.

Waltzing Matilda Waltzing Matilda
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me
And his ghost may be heard as you pass by that billabong
You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me.



:thumb: :cool:

[nickel]

You bastards buggar off F*CK YOU!!!!
WHAT A CATCHY TUNE..lol my best friend plays that constantly whenever we go anywhere in her car...(she's irish)
that song so rocks! it's a yell-along versus a sing-along.

-------------------------------------------

:heh: I know all the words to that one too.

I'm Irish enough to have a green passport with a Harp on the front of it. :D
damn, you are good :thumbup:

http://www.timmalloys.net/buggeroff.html

So you've been promisin the ladies a night of lovin bliss,
but truth be told your far to drunk to stand up straight and p*ss.
So give it up you lousy sods you'll not be gettin laid.
and the sooner that you're out the door the sooner we'll get paid.

[oblongmelon]

Kev ever hear of PAT CANE and WEST O'CLARE?
Pat and his wife sheila are friends of mine...And Brian Hyland and his wife and sister patty go to my church (and he taught latin and is the track coach at the catholic high school my kids went to-i see them OFTEN!).he's done some cd's ..not bad if i say so myself..he does alot of the festivals around the country..and he runs some pretty inexpensive trips to Ireland..

http://www.westoclare.com/

[kimchicowboy]

i'm sorry for taking this topic totally off topic. :P