So Painful...

[Wizard]

I just had an extremely painful (emotionally) experience. Anyone care to give me some advice on how to get over it? I've really never been so hurt in my life.


The final pain:

From June 16 2000 till December 2003 my entire life revolved around one person. A person that made me smile whenever I saw her, made me happier than I have ever been, and always tried to help me be a better me. We had a lot of problems though. I was not her knight in shining armor, I was not the prince she thought I was, I ended up being a guy that could never measure up. That's not how things started though. I was Mr. Right, I was the perfect guy, I was great.

Well me and Joanelle had kept talking on a regular basis till I went to visit Estevanny in Maryland. When I came back, she was always "busy," she always had something else going on, she didn't want me around. I didn't care that she didn't want me around, I didn't want to spend each day with her, I just wanted to make sure she was happy, make sure she had a good day. She didn't answer my calls, she never called me back.

Today she called to ask me to please stop calling her. She said it was bothering her, she said she didn't want me to know how her life is going, she didn't want me to know if she was ok. She wanted nothing to do with me. I can honestly say that's the most painful thing she's ever done to me. Where did I go wrong? What did I do? I never wanted to stop being her friend. I never wanted us to stop talking. I worry about how she is every day, I worry that her boyfriend, or ex hasn't hurt her. I want her to be happy. I want her life to be perfect. Now I'm not suppose to care, I'm not suppose to bother her. I thought I had shed my last tears because of Joanelle. I was wrong...

Why, oh God why?

Will this happen with Estevanny?

Joanelle is my ex. Estevanny is my new girl.

[Maarchk]

Usually when a girl breaks up with a guy, and this has been from what i have been through as well as heard from others, there is a period of detachment. They feel the relationship is over before they tell you how they feel. So while you are still feeling friends and remnants of what was, they are completely removed and moved on. It may or may not have to do with you visting the new girl, but odds are, she simply has shut you out and finally felt strong enough to tell you. As much as you might want to still be friends, usually girls do not handle that kind of attachment well after a breakup and so there is not much you can do.

You have someone new in your life and lots of other friends and things to look forward to. I would say if you can look for the good stuff and try not to hang on to the bad stuff, that it will make things a lot better for you. I know its much easier said then done.. (been there twice.) but seriously, you just gotta let go and hope that one day they care enough to check in, or that you forget them like a fading dream.

[nickel]

let her go Wiz. it won't be simple, but you will start to think about her less and less each day as time goes on.
and NO this doesn't happen all the time. hopefully this time you have found "the one".

[Wizard]

My Xanga (http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=JohFoo123)

Ok so I'm being gay?

[Wizard]

let her go Wiz. it won't be simple, but you will start to think about her less and less each day as time goes on.
and NO this doesn't happen all the time. hopefully this time you have found "the one".

hehehe talking with my new girl I realized a couple things.

1. I've been telling Joanelle for the past year to do this, and leave me alone. When she finally does it, it hurts me.

2. With my two previous ex's I was the one that cut them out.

3. I'm more hurt about losing the friend than the ex girlfriend. My best friend ever was a girl, and I lost her because I dated a girl that was her friend.

4. My new girl is so extremely better than my ex. If you guys play nice I might show you what my new girl looks like. ;)

[DarkFury]

Pretty much you need to move on...

I've been there before... and I know how it feels, but honestly... you gave it your best shot and it just didn't work out.

Now you are better prepared for the next one. :D