View Full Version : kids say the darndest things
RoniMan
12-16-2004, 08:51 AM
so i was teaching my pre-alg class, and one of the "slower" kids raised his hands and asked me "so do you have a wife, Mr. ___?"
i held up my hands to show him that there was no wedding rings, and he replied "you have TEN wives!?!?"
:disa:
BrewMaster
12-16-2004, 08:54 AM
here's one that my fiancee sent me:
A minister began eloquently during the offertory prayer.
"Dear Lord, "he began, with arms extended toward heaven and a rapturous look on his upturned face.
"Without you we are but dust. . "
He would have continued but at that moment a very obedient little child (who was listening!)
leaned over to mom and asked quite audibly in a shrill little voice,
"Mom, what is butt dust?"
Booyamos
12-16-2004, 09:00 AM
ha ha oh man i think every thread i have read today has made me laugh.. 10 wives... butt dust... hmm i think i am still 5 years old.
nickel
12-16-2004, 09:27 AM
so i was teaching my pre-alg class, and one of the "slower" kids raised his hands and asked me "so do you have a wife, Mr. ___?"
i held up my hands to show him that there was no wedding rings, and he replied "you have TEN wives!?!?"
:disa:
did this really happen to you Roni?
Jeffbx
12-16-2004, 09:31 AM
My next door neighbors are Buckeye fans from Ohio. They whip up a batch of buckeye candy (which is basically a big gob of peanut butter dipped in chocolate). My kids loved them, and the next day one of them asks, "Hey, do we have any more of those butt guys? You know, the peanut butter ones?"
Jenny
12-16-2004, 09:38 AM
HAHA to all of them. :D
My next door neighbors are Buckeye fans from Ohio. They whip up a batch of buckeye candy (which is basically a big gob of peanut butter dipped in chocolate). My kids loved them, and the next day one of them asks, "Hey, do we have any more of those butt guys? You know, the peanut butter ones?"
You should have immediately taken that child to your local gay district :P
BrewMaster
12-16-2004, 09:50 AM
You should have immediately taken that child to your local gay district :P
does Michigan even have a gay district? remember, he doesn't live in CA.
whitak24
12-16-2004, 09:55 AM
My next door neighbors are Buckeye fans from Ohio. They whip up a batch of buckeye candy (which is basically a big gob of peanut butter dipped in chocolate). My kids loved them, and the next day one of them asks, "Hey, do we have any more of those butt guys? You know, the peanut butter ones?"
this story is even funnier than it appears on the surface when you consider the bitter rivalry between OSU and U-M :heh:
RoniMan
12-16-2004, 09:56 AM
did this really happen to you Roni?
yup
nickel
12-16-2004, 10:02 AM
yup
the kid must've thought for a second that you had a harem :laugh:
does Michigan even have a gay district? remember, he doesn't live in CA.
I figure everywhere has a 'gay district'
RoniMan
12-16-2004, 10:11 AM
the kid must've thought for a second that you had a harem :laugh:
well...it IS a curse being THIS good looking....
:shifty:
quick GAM! pls lock the thread be4 anyone can reply!!
welfareloser
12-16-2004, 10:14 AM
ann arbor michigan is the gay capitol of the midwest :D a GREAT place to live, btw...
but he's in NY for school right now, right?
eg used to call buckeyes "boogers." as in, "hey mom, can we go pick some more boogers off pat and joyce's tree?" how can you say no to that? :heh:
but he's in NY for school right now, right?
Jeffbx is in Michigan
Whitak24 and Nickel are in NY
Welfareloser is in IL
Jenny is in KS
BrewMaster, Roniman, and myself are in CA
Kacrap is in MA (that's the only one I'm not sure about, but I'm pretty sure)
Booyamos
12-16-2004, 10:27 AM
yar i be in Boston.
still cracks me up the butt dust lol
BrewMaster
12-16-2004, 10:29 AM
i just looked at what it said under his name. location says MI and I assume it to be correct.
I had no idea Ann Arbor is the gay capitol of the midwest. I was there 2 months ago and I thought it was a cute little college down with not much else to speak of. And they had good beer at Arbor Brewing Co FWIW.
WhiskeyPapa
12-16-2004, 11:15 AM
Here are actual quotes from our household (we're starting to write them down so we can remember them):
Mom: “I wonder what would kill these ladybugs?”
Naomi: “I know, guns would!”
Tim (praying before lunch): “…and thanks for dirt, because without it we would just keep falling and falling and falling.”
Me (reading Luke 14): “But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind,”
Anna: “Not to my birthday party!”
Betsy (singing): “I wanna stay until Y-M-C-8!”
Naomi (complaining because her sister was staring at her): “What? Do I look like John Kerry or something?”
Anna: What are you making?
Mom: Seasoning for the chicken.
Anna: I bet the chicken will like that!
welfareloser
12-16-2004, 11:31 AM
:lmfao:
oh, lordy, those are priceless... being the deviant that i am, the ladybugs one really got me good :P
and brewmaster, how could you go to ann arbor and not go to GRIZZLY PEAK?!?!?!?! it's the greatest brewpub on the planet. their beers are the best. ever. anywhere. period. i will fight you to prove my point if i have to!!!! :P
and they serve bread made from spent brewing grains with herbed butter... ooohhh... heaven... after a few tries, i finally perfected my imitation of their bread.
when i lived in ann arbor, i was half a block from grizzly peak. ate there 2-3 times a week. every friday night, with about 6-10 other people from my lab... oh... it was well worth the $800/month rent on that crappy little un-insulated attic to live there... for one year, anyway :P
Jenny
12-16-2004, 12:28 PM
HAHA Those are great wwp! The material you get with 10 kids must be amazing. :D
bachviet
12-16-2004, 07:56 PM
Those are funny... :laugh:
oblongmelon
12-16-2004, 09:22 PM
Jeffbx is in Michigan
Whitak24 and Nickel are in NY
Welfareloser is in IL
Jenny is in KS
BrewMaster, Roniman, and myself are in CA
Kacrap is in MA (that's the only one I'm not sure about, but I'm pretty sure)
Nija I'm feeling left out...I'm in NEW YORK TOO..*sob*
Nija I'm feeling left out...I'm in NEW YORK TOO..*sob*
You hadn't posted in the thread at that time ;)
(since that's all that list is, a listing of everyone, everywhere, who had posted, at that time)
ShawnLee
12-17-2004, 02:03 PM
Kacrap is in MA (that's the only one I'm not sure about, but I'm pretty sure)Yeah, there's a lot of that crap in MA. :hihi:
Me (reading Luke 14): “But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind,”
Anna: “Not to my birthday party!”
Oh man, I'm going to be using that in a sermon.
Naomi (complaining because her sister was staring at her): “What? Do I look like John Kerry or something?” That's cool.
Yossarian
12-17-2004, 02:05 PM
don't worry obby, you're still one of the hottest people i've never met
BrewMaster
12-17-2004, 02:12 PM
Tim (praying before lunch): “…and thanks for dirt, because without it we would just keep falling and falling and falling.”
:lmfao: :lmfao:
oh geez. that one was hilarious. your kid is destined to be an astrophysicist or something.
BrewMaster
12-17-2004, 02:19 PM
and brewmaster, how could you go to ann arbor and not go to GRIZZLY PEAK?!?!?!?! it's the greatest brewpub on the planet. their beers are the best. ever. anywhere. period. i will fight you to prove my point if i have to!!!! :P
well I had one evening to kill driving from DTW to Adrian, MI and folks on beeradvoate.com recommended Arbor Brewing Co. I wasn't disappointed at all. Great ribs and a fun place.
Next time I have to head out to Adrian, MI I'll stop by Grizzly Peak. It got decent reviews on Beer Advocate (http://www.beeradvocate.com/beerfly/user_reviews/1106/). But that is a pretty bold statement you make about their beer being the best on the planet. i can't argue because i've never had their beer, but i will say that i have had some pretty amazing beers in my time. i will reserve judgement until I pass by there in March (or whenever it starts to warm up around there).
Jeffbx
12-20-2004, 06:17 AM
ann arbor michigan is the gay capitol of the midwest :D a GREAT place to live, btw...
Yes, AA (and Royal Oak) are probably the more popular destinations for those who 'putt from the rough'.
The children's hands on schience museum in AA is a great place to go, and Zingerman's Deli (http://www.zingermans.com/Index.pasp) was voted one of the best restaurants in the world by Food & Wine or one of those other food magazines. I don't know about most of the other restaurants in the world, but I can say that this one is one of my favorites.
cheapie
12-20-2004, 06:27 AM
well I had one evening to kill driving from DTW to Adrian, MI and folks on beeradvoate.com recommended Arbor Brewing Co. I wasn't disappointed at all. Great ribs and a fun place.
Next time I have to head out to Adrian, MI I'll stop by Grizzly Peak. It got decent reviews on Beer Advocate (http://www.beeradvocate.com/beerfly/user_reviews/1106/). But that is a pretty bold statement you make about their beer being the best on the planet. i can't argue because i've never had their beer, but i will say that i have had some pretty amazing beers in my time. i will reserve judgement until I pass by there in March (or whenever it starts to warm up around there).
so.....we'll see you in june?
:neartears
wanna know how cold is right now? 13 degrees. which is considerably warmer than yesterday. sigh....
Booyamos
12-20-2004, 06:59 AM
hey it's 13 degrees here too! and snowing.. well sorta snowing now.
nickel
12-20-2004, 08:50 AM
we are in a friggin deep freeze here. :|
somebody talk to me about global warming
Hypnotist
12-20-2004, 08:50 AM
Here are actual quotes from our household (we're starting to write them down so we can remember them):
Mom: “I wonder what would kill these ladybugs?”
Naomi: “I know, guns would!”
Tim (praying before lunch): “…and thanks for dirt, because without it we would just keep falling and falling and falling.”
Me (reading Luke 14): “But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind,”
Anna: “Not to my birthday party!”
Betsy (singing): “I wanna stay until Y-M-C-8!”
Naomi (complaining because her sister was staring at her): “What? Do I look like John Kerry or something?”
Anna: What are you making?
Mom: Seasoning for the chicken.
Anna: I bet the chicken will like that!
PRICESS!... What a Blessing...
57 degrees and beautiful bright sunshine in NM... A GLORIOUS DAY!
BrewMaster
12-20-2004, 09:46 AM
so.....we'll see you in june?
:neartears
wanna know how cold is right now? 13 degrees. which is considerably warmer than yesterday. sigh....
maybe. i don't need it to be 75 degrees and sunny or anything, but I won't do the current 13°F weather. Above 55°F and not raining is fine with me. We'll see when that is though...
Mommypooh
12-20-2004, 09:55 AM
Kids are the greatest, It is -1 here in good ol Ohio
ShawnLee
12-20-2004, 10:33 AM
I was listening to the Chargers winning yesterday while I was driving home from church, and I could hear the cold over the radio.
Funny. Colder than a witch's teet over there. Balmy and mid-70's in LA.
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