I Know a Guy Who Hasn't Gone in 6 Weeks

[johnnymk]

This is not a potty thread where I am trying to be funny.

He shows up with a woman friend of mine most of the time at the Karaoke places I go to. He is extremely stubborn and refuses to see doctors or take medications for anything. He is 61 or 62. She told me about a month ago that he was having problems. She explained the situation to her doctor then who told her to tell him to go to the emergency room.

Well, he hasn't done a thing, so she told a few of his children about his problem. He became furious for exposing the information to them.

He is not the kind of guy who is despondent or anything, although his wife died about 6 years ago.

Everyone I talk to says that he is going to die of internal poisoning if his colon bursts. Has anyone ever known of a situation like this? It is so bizarre that I sometimes wonder if it's real.

My friend fully expects to be attending his funeral in the very near future.

[BigJon]

Good lord. Never heard of someone going that long...

[DarkFury]

Good lord. Never heard of someone going that long...
Umm.. you mean "not going" that long right? :heh:


Break out the Metamucil and LOOKOUT!!! :eek:

[sizemic1]

I think that's what Elvis died of.

[MikeD]

I think that's what Elvis died of.

I thought Elvis was still alive...

:hihi:

[nickel]

somebody slip that guy an ex-lax!

all kidding aside, he's a dumb bastard. he's gotta be having some stomach pain from the backup. (well, we think of it as stomach pain, but it's coming from the colon/intestines)

[Markel]

somebody slip that guy an ex-lax!
It's too late for that.

I remember my wife telling a story from when she was in nursing school (she got her RN). One of her fellow students had not gone for over a week, and ended up in the ER (at the hospital that the nursing school was attached to). My wife was down there at the time and remembers the girl screaming as they dug out the impacted....

[zippyjuan]

My grandmother died from this last year- she was 93 and still very active and a sharp mind. Her husband wasn't doing well (he passed just before 97) and she was more worried about him. She was always the type of person to put others ahead of herself and she never told anyone until it was too late. I am amazed the guy you are talking about is still alive. Get it fixed now or say goodbye.

[Gothic Girl]

I wonder if his prostate is swollen. I hope he gets over his pride and gets into a doctor right away.

[ShawnLee]

Didn't Hank Hill suffer from this? That's bad... I hope he can just suck it up and go see the doc...

[Kevster]

He needs to get to an emergency room PRONTO. This blockage needs to be taken care of immediately! I had a neighbor years ago who didn't go to the doctor when he started having these problems and he was surviving on soup. He died from complications due to this so believe me when I say it is VERY serious!

If you want to save his life, drag him to the hospital now!

[Gothic Girl]

Didn't Hank Hill suffer from this? That's bad... I hope he can just suck it up and go see the doc...
:heh: Yeah, you're right!

[GracieBayb]

all i could think when i read this was we need to dig up that one thread on colonic treatments

[Freelance Superhero]

the feeling of impending doom after reading this thread is frankly a bit disturbing... :(

i really hope everything turns out okay for your friend, but stubbornness is hard to break...

[Butch]

:stupid: x all the posters

He better get his ass to the emergency room in a hurry. The body tries to get rid of excrement for a reason . . . you don't want to hold on to it . . .

[BigJon]

Umm.. you mean "not going" that long right? :heh:

No, I guess I meant to say "gone that long...without going" but that sounded weird.

You know what I meant. :P

[DarkFury]

No, I guess I meant to say "gone that long...without going" but that sounded weird.

You know what I meant. :P
Of course... but it was far funnier to make a comment on it. :heh:

[oblongmelon]

It's too late for that.

I remember my wife telling a story from when she was in nursing school (she got her RN). One of her fellow students had not gone for over a week, and ended up in the ER (at the hospital that the nursing school was attached to). My wife was down there at the time and remembers the girl screaming as they dug out the impacted....

well digging out an impaction is unpleasant for the digger as well as the patient..I can assure you of that since I have had the pleasure of performing the dirty job myself-ugh-thank God I went to work in the Nursery when I did..
I think someone should pick up a bottle of Lemon flavored mag citrate-add some orange juice to it and tell the guy it's a mixed drink-I wouldn't worry about him too much Johnny-If he has the guts to tell his lady friend about it-you KNOW when it gets bad enough he'll be crying in the E.R.
I would bet money that he is "going" just not in adequate amounts to make him feel comfortable..

[Thesifer]

probably not going his usual 3 times a day or something.. otherwise he should be dead by now

[bachviet]

That's bad. Hopefully he puts away his pride and gets to the hospital.

[gugnheim]

:It's Craptacular!


:thud:

-Gug

[welfareloser]

i have heard of this before... i have an otherwise healthy friend who didn't crap for 5 weeks after her c-section :hihi: come to think of it, c-section #2 is scheduled next week... i should send her some prunes...

yeah, once an infection starts, it can kill you quickly. if he gets a fever, take him to the emergency room AGAINST HIS WILL if you have to. 6 weeks is about the point where a deadly infection is absolutely inevitable. this isn't going to unstop itself on its own no matter what he does. it could be a number of things causing it... none of them good.

i dunno. i think you have two choices right now... watch him die in the next couple of weeks or piss him off with a good old-fashioned intervention :shrug:

[johnnymk]

He won't listen to me. I am not really that close to him to have any effect on him at all. And he is mocking my friend for telling him to get help. And you would think one of his kids would force him to the hospital. Like I said, we will be going to his funeral any day now.

[Grimm]

He won't listen to me. I am not really that close to him to have any effect on him at all. And he is mocking my friend for telling him to get help. And you would think one of his kids would force him to the hospital. Like I said, we will be going to his funeral any day now.
Can you get a life insurance policy on him? Hey, if he's gonna die, some good might as well come of it!

Call the cops, suicide is illegal.

[nickel]

He won't listen to me. I am not really that close to him to have any effect on him at all. And he is mocking my friend for telling him to get help. And you would think one of his kids would force him to the hospital. Like I said, we will be going to his funeral any day now.
what a sh!tty way to die.

i'm thinking he may be doing this all for attention or else he'd be in some kinda pain right now. somebody should set up a spycam in his toidy or measure his roll of tp and see if it changes.

[cheapie]

what if he has a runny nose and doesn't have any kleenex? :heh:

[welfareloser]

i'm thinking he may be doing this all for attention or else he'd be in some kinda pain right now.

not really... if it's just a straight-up obstruction, there doesn't have to be much pain at all (until the infections tarts, of course... then he gonna HURT.) it builds up and expands the colon, your eating gradually tapers off, and right now, it's entirely likely that all he feels is a little gassy.

the attention-whore thing did cross my mind, too, tho. maybe more of a [red foreman] QUIT YER BELLYACHIN I HAVEN'T GONE IN SIX WEEKS AND LOOK AT ME I'M FINE! [/red foreman] kind of thing. :P

sounds like the best way to ease your conscience would be to just keep tabs on him... if he suddenly doesn't show up somewhere he's supposed to be or doesn't answer the phone, go to his house and bust down a door, or call 911 and convince them that it needs doing. unless you wanted to clobber him on the back of the head, drag him to the ER, and tell them you found him unconscious and oh, by the way, he ain't pooped in a fortnight or three... :hihi:

[DarkFury]

Truly it sounds like he got a bad case of Gubment Cheeze...


:eek:

[oblongmelon]

Truly it sounds like he got a bad case of Gubment Cheeze...


:eek:

OMG I almost fell out of my chair laughing at this..and that wouldn't be good since I can barely move now..are you trying to kill me DF?

[gaemul]

dude, that's disgusting. my wife has had chronic constipation since she was a baby. But she got some accupuncture treatment and she's all good now.

[Showtime]

didnt read all the posts... did anyone mention that he could have a huge tapeworm or something? just a thought...

[MikeD]

Any update?


Still going strong? :)


Sick? :sick:


Hospitalized? :toxic:


Worse? :dead:

[RIVERWIDOW]

dude, that's disgusting. my wife has had chronic constipation since she was a baby. But she got some accupuncture treatment and she's all good now.

A great little home remedy for constipation is too add about 1/2 teaspoon of Karo Syrup in your milk or juice. It also works well for babies. You can add it to water or formula. :)

[johnnymk]

Any update?


Still going strong? :)


Sick? :sick:


Hospitalized? :toxic:


Worse? :dead:

I saw him last night at a local tavern. If you talk to him and notice his movements, there appears to be no problem with him at all. He actually ordered some french fries and onion rings. His appetite appears to be pretty good.

I didn't want to bring the topic up when he was there, but the woman I know who was also there tells me he is taking laxatives and prune juice in large quantities. I asked her if he is lying about this and she said definitely not.

And my sister told me that there are 30 feet of intestines in the avergae person's body, so I guess that could hold a lot of food.

[nickel]

I saw him last night at a local tavern. If you talk to him and notice his movements, there appears to be no problem with him at all. He actually ordered some french fries and onion rings. His appetite appears to be pretty good.

I didn't want to bring the topic up when he was there, but the woman I know who was also there tells me he is taking laxatives and prune juice in large quantities. I asked her if he is lying about this and she said definitely not.

And my sister told me that there are 30 feet of intestines in the avergae person's body, so I guess that could hold a lot of food.
i think he's FOS, literally ;)

[MikeD]

i think he's FOS, literally ;)


And figuratively, too. Me thinks he should be on Snopes...