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PiPhiAngel
03-22-2006, 12:28 PM
Man severs own penis, throws it at officers

March 17, 2006

BY ERIC HERMAN Staff Reporter

Before cops threw the book at him, Jakub Fik threw something unusual at them -- his penis.

Fik, 33, cut off his own penis during a Northwest Side rampage Wednesday morning. When confronted by police, Fik hurled several knives and his severed organ at the officers, police said. Officers stunned him with a Taser and took him into custody.

"We took him out without any serious injury, with the exception of his own," said Chicago Police Sgt. Edward Dolan of the 16th District.

Doctors at Northwestern Memorial Hospital reattached Fik's penis Wednesday, sources said. He was listed in good condition Thursday, according to hospital spokesman Andrew Buchanan, who declined to comment further.

Smashing car windows



Fik, who lives in the 5400 block of W. Berenice, is charged with two counts of aggravated assault and one count of criminal damage to property, said Officer Laura Kubiak. He told paramedics he was distraught over problems with his girlfriend in Poland, Dolan said.

Police arrived on Fik's block at 8:20 a.m. Wednesday after receiving reports he was smashing car windows, Dolan said. Fik then broke into a house down the block. A group of six or seven officers assembled in front of the house, Dolan said.

The occupants were not home, he added.

Fik was bleeding when the officers arrived and may have already cut off his organ, Dolan said.

"At that point, this guy came running out, naked, with a handful of knives . . . and started throwing knives at the police officers that were 10, 20, 30 feet away," Dolan said.

Fik threw his penis during the confrontation, too, Dolan said. He then went back into the house and re-emerged with "another handful of knives," Dolan said.

Dolan sneaked to the side of the bungalow's front steps and stunned Fik with the Taser. Fik fought back when officers went to restrain him, Dolan said.

"About 10 feet from the front porch, right on the sidewalk, was his penis," Dolan said.

Dr. Greg Bales, associate professor of urology at the University of Chicago, said severed penises are uncommon but surgery usually works.

"As long as the penis is placed on ice and reattached within a few hours, the success is usually pretty good," Bales said.

Contributing: Annie Sweeney

link to the article (http://www.suntimes.com/output/news/cst-nws-ouch17.html#)

LegendKiller
03-22-2006, 12:31 PM
He's definitely goign to get off with an insanity plea.

ufcrusher
03-22-2006, 12:34 PM
"As long as the penis is placed on ice and reattached within a few hours, the success is usually pretty good," Bales said.



I would think shrinkage would be a problem...although it would be the least of his problems at that time.

KIISQueen
03-22-2006, 01:07 PM
The man is definitely :nuts:

DarkFury
03-22-2006, 02:03 PM
There's crazy and then there's looney....

This guy is definitely beyond crazy. :hmm: :hmm:

zenbooty
03-22-2006, 02:46 PM
Well he sure showed them! :eek3:

ArkiStan
03-22-2006, 03:08 PM
Imagine actually getting hit by the penis artifact that was thrown. Now that's my difinition of a bad day at work.

surfer
03-22-2006, 03:23 PM
Weird

ialsohaveadream
03-22-2006, 03:59 PM
Ah, youth. I remember the days when I used to throw my penis at cops.

Freelance Superhero
03-22-2006, 05:58 PM
He told paramedics he was distraught over problems with his girlfriend in Poland, Dolan said."distraught"... there's an understatement if i ever heard one...

bachviet
03-22-2006, 10:51 PM
He's definitely goign to get off with an insanity plea.
:stupid:

shocky123
03-22-2006, 11:04 PM
That's so random....

~Kyle

Dem0072
03-23-2006, 03:22 AM
I would like to know why. Thats what I wanna know.

Hes a fruitcake but what the hell posesses a man to do that.

Gothic Girl
03-23-2006, 05:21 AM
Wow. This guy sounds JUST like my neighbor downstairs... :eek: :hmm:

Kudos
03-23-2006, 05:30 AM
I'm suprised someone could cut their own penis off, and still have the energy to run around, throw stuff....go back for more stuff to throw etc...
Personally if I ever lost my junk, I'd curl up into the fetal position, and die right there.
I wonder if the guy was on any drugs

nickel
03-23-2006, 07:02 AM
I'm suprised someone could cut their own penis off, and still have the energy to run around, throw stuff....go back for more stuff to throw etc...
Personally if I ever lost my junk, I'd curl up into the fetal position, and die right there.
I wonder if the guy was on any drugs
yeh. drugs are bad, k?

ShawnLee
03-23-2006, 09:51 AM
Ah, youth. I remember the days when I used to throw my penis at cops.Is there a story here that you'd like to share with the class?

Thesifer
03-24-2006, 12:39 PM
Interesting. You think the girlfriend in Poland is an Internet girlfriend.. Balding.. about 45.. and a well trimmed beard?