San Diego - 94.1 FM J&J Morning Show Drama Club Thread

[3kitties]

I just have to say... thank you all for the great entertainment. I have been reading for many, many months and then signed up to be part of the "group". can I please get a number?

if Laura gets those kids back, that will be a huge mistake and I feel so bad f DC because she seems like she is a pro manipulator.. if she hasn't relapsed already, she is going to soon.

I love this turkey every time I see it!! :turkey:

[Jammie J.]

Originally Posted by insightbyjake

No.

"Jake" is the fake name FH suggests when guys call the show.

I called in years ago...there was a woman who complained her husband never takes out the trash.

Later, they had a "What are you thankful for?" segment (During Thanksgiving week). I called in, FH told me I was "Jake," and I said I was thankful for never having to take out the trash.

I retired soon after, and I am left with only my ability to spell reasonably well (did I get "reasonably" correct?) while living an alternate life on this thread.

P.S.

Apropos of nothing, does anyone else miss Phil Hartman? He was so talented...what a shame he married the extreme version of LBM.

Oh, well. That dude sounded just like I imagined you would sound. He seemed to be smart, too, I think he said he was a brain researcher or something like that. It was ambiguous & lofty enough that it also sounded like something you would do. (sad sigh)

[Jammie J.]

Originally Posted by boris85

It's only a matter of time before Laura tells all of us that Chimp Charlie is in "therapy" for his obsession with dismembering and eating neighborhood cats... and then making lovely loin clothes for Chips' two daddies out of their fluffy pelts.

Hey! Why do you have to pick on cats, huh? Can't he have an obsession with crabs or oysters or something like that?

Not to mention, "Uncle Jer" really won't like that!

[Jammie J.]

Originally Posted by SadSadSad

There is a quote from FH about how important radio was during the fires in the Del Mar Times. But what is really interesting is the article below about the smuggling at Dog Beach. Now we really know why LBM was there. She was looking for a date.

http://www.delmartimes.net/Pages20071109/frontpage.php

Do you think that's why she went to the Del Mar race tracks that one time (and didn't drink)? She was checking out her fellow horses?

[SanDiegan]

All we talk about now is Laura and Tommy, (and the same things about them over and over.)

J&J's plan is working perfectly. They are staying out of everything, letting LBM and FH take the limelight, so that when their contracts are up, they can fade away, and Tommy and Laura will still have jobs, (or that's their plan, anyway.)

Ahhh... their work is done. We rarely talk about the two J's on here anymore anyway.

[SDReadhead]

Originally Posted by NewAgeGoddess

If you had to spend 24 hours with someone on the showgram who would it be and why?

I'd pick XXXL Fat Head Tub-o-lard, BUT it would be on my terms. I'd put eye patches over both of my eyes so that I wouldn't have to see him. He'd have to sit still in a chair and not talk all day. He'd have to listen to my lengthy list of why I think he is a most despicable person -- from his lecherous adultering to his horrific parenting (or lack there of) to his phoney persona. Then I'd call up Paul McCartney who would tell FH all the ways in which they are dissimilar. Then I'd make up a song entitled "Holy Balls, Am I Ever a Jackass" and he'd have to learn all 18 verses of it. Each day from now on the J/j Spewgram would begin and end with that song.

If you want to know the tune of Holy Balls Am I Ever a Jackass, just watch the turkey dance to it and I'm sure you'll hear it in your head. Here goes ...:turkey:

[NewAgeGoddess]

Originally Posted by SDReadhead

I'd pick XXXL Fat Head Tub-o-lard, BUT it would be on my terms. I'd put eye patches over both of my eyes so that I wouldn't have to see him. He'd have to sit still in a chair and not talk all day. He'd have to listen to my lengthy list of why I think he is a most despicable person -- from his lecherous adultering to his horrific parenting (or lack there of) to his phoney persona. Then I'd call up Paul McCartney who would tell FH all the ways in which they are dissimilar. Then I'd make up a song entitled "Holy Balls, Am I Ever a Jackass" and he'd have to learn all 18 verses of it. Each day from now on the J/j Spewgram would begin and end with that song.

If you want to know the tune of Holy Balls Am I Ever a Jackass, just watch the turkey dance to it and I'm sure you'll hear it in your head. Here goes ...:turkey:

This is priceless!!!!


Are you really a red head? I am now! With green eyes.

[NewAgeGoddess]

Where is everyone tonight??? We we all meeting somewhere and nobody told me? I feel like such a loser!!! Maybe me and LBM can be friends now that we are both losers!!!

[OneKidOneDogMom]

You're not alone and we won't let you sink to the level of befriending LBM....

I can't believe how quiet it is in here - I think we actually went two whole hours without a post!

[BebeSD]

Originally Posted by NewAgeGoddess

Maybe me and LBM can be friends now that we are both losers!!!

WRONG. I cannot speak for you but LBM is no loser. She is kind of a big deal!!

[WhoMe]

Originally Posted by SDReadhead

Then I'd make up a song entitled "Holy Balls, Am I Ever a Jackass" and he'd have to learn all 18 verses of it. Each day from now on the J/j Spewgram would begin and end with that song.

Ok, that got me. We have some FUNNY people here! Y'all oughta apply at Clear Channel, they have a need for some fresh talent. Of course if you send 'em a demo you may hear your stuff being claimed as Jer's witty repartee.

:turkey:

[NewAgeGoddess]

Originally Posted by BebeSD

WRONG. I cannot speak for you but LBM is no loser. She is kind of a big deal!!

I want to be a big deal too!!!!


Okay....I only want to be a big deal to my kids. And they already know I'm not.

[NewAgeGoddess]

If I could spell I would be dangerous!!!!!

[NewAgeGoddess]

What happened to Jake, SDGirl and Boris????? Did they take the night off???

Caption for Tommy in the tub (or in the Sea World tank)...

How to take a bath:

1) First you fill the tub.
2) Then you turn on the water.

As one of my best friends would say, "Fat jokes are just a cheap dig when you are mad at someone, because you would never say anything like that to someone you care about who is overweight."

True enough for me...fat isn't one of those things that bug me. It cracks me up that so many people I know just get so upset by it. I would think that the person who is overweight would actually be the person who would be upset. lol

[insightbyjake]

Originally Posted by NewAgeGoddess

What happened to Jake, SDGirl and Boris????? Did they take the night off???

Take the night off???!!!


You've never heard of a three-some?????

[NewAgeGoddess]

Originally Posted by insightbyjake

Take the night off???!!!


You've never heard of a three-some?????

I'm not a prude. Can we make it a foursome? I'll bring the wine!!!

[insightbyjake]

Sorry!!!!!

My Bad!!!!!!!!!!

I thought you wrote: Jake, Boris and Elton......


That "three-some" comment....? ........that was a joke.....Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.....get it?......a joke.........I was only making fun of the idea........a joke................

[GirlfromOR]

I really hope that DC gets custody of the children when the time comes. Laura may be able to show that she's made a little bit of progress, but Dave can show that he's given the kids proven stability, which IMO is way more valuable. Dave probably understands that the kids are not his friends, and that is something Laura doesn't get. I hope that Dave has witnesses and people to speak of his character, and I hope that he uses Laura's diary and the videos against her. Her diary is proof that she doesn't get it. She is as irresponsible today as she was back when she went to rehab.

I'm wondering if the counselor the kid goes to reports to the court at all... if so, I think bringing him there soaking wet shows that Laura is nothing but a good time parent. Breaking into closed facilities, letting the kids play the lotto, etc... all irresponsible things that she has done and put into writing. DC better use that stuff against her. If she's willing to publically share her delinquencies, I wonder what she does that she doesn't write about.

If she gets full custody of the kids, it would be the worst thing for her. She could relapse at any moment, and the kids don't need that in their lives. Living w/ her will just create a chaotic situation for them.

[insightbyjake]

Originally Posted by NewAgeGoddess

I'm not a prude. Can we make it a foursome? I'll bring the wine!!!

Bring the wine.........I'll kill SDGirl and Boris and we'll have a "duet" of passion.....

(HEY SDGIRL.....I'M FOOLING THEM ABOUT KILLING YOU...

Boris...sory.)

[NewAgeGoddess]

Originally Posted by insightbyjake

Sorry!!!!!

My Bad!!!!!!!!!!

I thought you wrote: Jake, Boris and Elton......


That "three-some" comment....? ........that was a joke.....Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.....get it?......a joke.........I was only making fun of the idea........a joke................

I knew it was a joke. I was only flirting!!!!

[NewAgeGoddess]

Originally Posted by insightbyjake

Bring the wine.........I'll kill SDGirl and Boris and we'll have a "duet" of passion.....

Name the time and the place!!!

[GirlfromOR]

If I was forced to spend 24 hours w/ someone from the the Showgram, I'd pick Laura.

1) I like to shop
2) I'd LOVE a nap!
3) I really want to see if she is as disorganized and dumb in person as she presents herself to be. Can anyone really be that dense?

[insightbyjake]

Originally Posted by NewAgeGoddess

Name the time and the place!!!

I've decided the time is 3 hours.

The place is anywhere you are.

Am I close???

(This is all new to me.)

[NewAgeGoddess]

Originally Posted by insightbyjake

I've decided the time is 3 hours.

The place is anywhere you are.

Am I close???

(This is all new to me.)

Works for me!!!! PQ okay????

[Wabbitsd]

:turkey:

[Newer Reader]

Well, so....did you young whippersnappers have a rendezvous in PQ or not? I checked The Golden Spoon...y'all weren't there...

NR #26

Originally Posted by GirlfromOR

I'm wondering if the counselor the kid goes to reports to the court at all... if so, I think bringing him there soaking wet shows that Laura is nothing but a good time parent. Breaking into closed facilities, letting the kids play the lotto, etc... all irresponsible things that she has done and put into writing.

Geez, I practically want to print out her diary to show to my mother and say..."YAH! And what say you about that?" I don't know if my parents even knew the meaning of the word 'fun.'

ONE TIME my parents decided to take me to the beach...you know, to be a family. My mom wore a huge hat and large Jackie O. sunglasses, zinc oxide or PABA probably all over her face. She brought a blanket to sit on and one to cover her up! She was afraid of the sun in 1970! We probably stayed for about 20 minutes and they probably both said, "Well, that's that...time to go home. Phew! We got through that all in one piece." We only lived 2 blocks from the beach!

Drive me to get a lotto ticket? First I'd have to work on getting them severely drunk. Well, Dad was always good for a spontaneous suggestion of a Frosty Freeze ice cream and maybe I could say, "Can we play the lotto just once?" (Sometimes I could work his soft side). No problem, if you don't mind the exhausting, adult lecture about the dangers of gambling and he'd paint a grim picture of me sitting in Vegas with nothing left but the shirt on my back and maybe throw in pregnant. I'd have to ask what "Vegas" and "Pregnant" mean and then it would be so depressing that I'd come home with my unscratched ticket and just prefer to sit in my room and try to cheer myself up with an episode of "I Dream of Jeannie." I'd throw the *dirty* ticket away.

Mom? Fun? Just Google "fun" and you'll see a video of her letting me read the jokes to her out of "Highlights" magazine when we'd go to the dentist or something. She was about as impulsive and frivolous as an ant carrying food in preparation for winter.

My parents as my best friends? Ha...a Ha...a HAHAHAHA! It was pretty clear to me that we were not exactly "equals" when I got all creative and drew pictures on our walls one time, my dad got mad, and I stuck my tongue out at him and it resulted in a spanking. How DARE my "friends" act like that over a simple disagreement.

It would have scared me to death if my mother or father started asking my opinion about where we should live, and catering to my whims and demands. What if I was wrong about something...I mean, "I'm JUST a kid! How am I supposed to decide if you should get married or not, if we should live in an apt. or a house or if we should have cake or eggs for breakfast? I wanna go to school where they tell us what to do."

[SDGirl87]

Well heck. Looks like I had one humdinger of a good time last night and somehow managed to survive, if you know what I mean. Wish I could remember it. Jake, what did you put in my Sangria??? Funny, I don't even have a headache today. It's like it all never happened..................

Whoever posted the "first fill up the bathtub, then add water" ... that made me spit out my coffee...LOVED IT!

My parents believed that we 3 were their kids and they were the parents. We had rules, boundaries and punishment. If the teacher called home (oh goodness...that thought STILL makes me shudder!), the teacher was automatically believed - no excuses made or allowed.

My parents believed in raising responsible adults. We had a bed time, a curfew, a limit on phone time, ate dinner every night together at the dinner table, and did our own laundry from age 12 on. We did not have a phone or television in our room. If we were late coming home, we were not allowed back out for privileges for a week. There was zero tolerance for misbehavior. My 2 brothers shared a room.

They were the meanest, strictest, least flexible, most unfair parents in the whole world, and I thank them from the bottom of my heart.

[SDGirl87]

Hat tip to the person who sent this to me. Keep them coming!

Our word today...

MORON