Ladies... please read all of this... :)

Showtime · 10-10-2006, 01:56 PM

Got this email a while back and thought I'd share since someone posted a thread about what us guys know. Here is a list of rules that you ladies should know.

Note: please pay particular attention to rule #1.

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally, the guys' side of the story. We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us
complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every
question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of them makes you sad or angry, then we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a
fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an
answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is
fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

hapoo · 10-10-2006, 02:00 PM

i love it

Jenny · 10-10-2006, 02:06 PM

haha It's all true, too.

I'm not sexist at all. It's funny and true.

hehehe

MikeD · 10-10-2006, 02:10 PM

I'm down with Rule #1. Couldn't be more on target.

starkiis · 10-10-2006, 02:12 PM

That was so true... Too funny

Airencracken · 10-10-2006, 02:17 PM

Sad that most of those are true.

KIISQueen · 10-10-2006, 02:24 PM

LMAO!!! So True

PoorAvatar · 10-10-2006, 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Showtime

Got this email a while back and thought I'd share since someone posted a thread about what us guys know. Here is a list of rules that you ladies should know.

That's funny. I got this email:
Once upon a time, a girl asked a guy, "Will you marry me?"
The guy said, "No," and the girl lived happily ever after and went shopping, drank
martinis, always had a clean house, never had to cook, stayed skinny, and was never farted on.

The End

10-10-2006, 02:00 PM	#2
hapoo Fleet Admiral Join Date: Jan 2000 Location: 742 Evergreen Terrace, Springfield USA Posts: 9,276	i love it __________________

10-10-2006, 02:06 PM	#3
Jenny Chief of Naval Operations Join Date: Mar 2000 Location: Kansas City area Posts: 10,947	haha It's all true, too. I'm not sexist at all. It's funny and true. hehehe __________________ Check out my spoilers for over 20 shows @ SpoilerFix.com Check out my TV blog, where I post weekly & daily TV schedules, TV news, interviews with TV stars & more! All new TV forums as well @ TV Is My Pacifier

10-10-2006, 02:10 PM	#4
MikeD President, Cowboys Nation Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: In the 'burbs, west of D.C. Posts: 5,139	I'm down with Rule #1. Couldn't be more on target. __________________

10-10-2006, 02:12 PM	#5
starkiis Lieutenant Commander Join Date: May 2006 Location: oc Posts: 537	That was so true... Too funny __________________ MAKE THIS YEAR YOUR BEST YEAR EVER. ENJOY EVERY MINUTE OF IT.

10-10-2006, 02:17 PM	#6
Airencracken Admiral Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: California Posts: 6,681	Sad that most of those are true. __________________ "I remember my first orgasm, I just wish someone was there to share it with me..."11-05-2003 05:33 AM - Topane They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, & the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opiate of the masses. - Karl Marx Hell is other people - Jean-Paul Sartre

10-10-2006, 01:56 PM	#1
Showtime Lakers fanatic Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: L.A. ->SoCal<- O.C. Posts: 7,338	Ladies... please read all of this... :) Got this email a while back and thought I'd share since someone posted a thread about what us guys know. Here is a list of rules that you ladies should know. Note: please pay particular attention to rule #1. At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally, the guys' side of the story. We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! 1. Men are NOT mind readers. 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way. 1. Crying is blackmail. 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. 1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem. See a doctor. 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days. 1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys. 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of them makes you sad or angry, then we meant the other one 1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. 1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials. 1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we. 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is. 1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later. 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear. 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really. 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf. 1. You have enough clothes. 1. You have too many shoes. 1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape! 1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. __________________ NBA REPORT 10-11/ The 3-Peat! 1948 1949 1950 1952 1953 1954 1972 1980 1982 1985 1987 1988 2000 2001 2002 2009 2010 Reigning NBA CHAMPS! Last edited by Showtime : 10-10-2006 at 01:59 PM.

10-10-2006, 02:24 PM	#7
KIISQueen Rear Admiral Upper Half Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 3,985	LMAO!!! So True

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