Guy with Girl problems

Cheesypuff · 09-05-2001, 10:59 PM

Hey I wanted to write here because you girls are in here and you ladies are got|apex girls, so I feel like you girls can help me...Like a typical guy I don't know what to do in a long distance relationship...I sometimes feel like I don't know my girlfriend like I should...and that leads to not communicating as well as if we were together. What do you ladies think?

Jenny · 09-05-2001, 11:30 PM

Well, my biggest piece of advice is: KEEP TALKING! Don't assume that the girl doesn't want to hear from you or whatever. Doesn't matter if you think she's busy or isn't itching to hear from you. Trust me. If she loves you (or cares about you a lot), she will ALWAYS be glad to get an email or e-card from you. Sit down at the end of the day and email her. Whether it be one sentance of "I was thinking about you today and it made me smile." or a long email about how your day went...it doesn't matter. Maybe once a week (or more if she is the type like I am), send her an ecard. Don't always make them sappy. Just hello, how are you, glad we are friends, I miss you, I love you, whatever. A good place to get them is American Greetings .

One question you have to ask yourself is: "How do I feel about her? Do I love her enough to want to put in the extra effort this will take?" If the answer is no, then break it off. That is the best thing you could do for both of you. If the answer is yes, then give it your best!

Good luck and keep us updated!

Jenny

Cheesypuff · 09-06-2001, 02:00 AM

Thanks Jenny,

I'll try to talk to her more...but the only thing is...is that I really don't know what to say. I've known this girl for about 7 years and I moved to Cali about 3 years ago...and we got together this summer when I visited. I love her so much...but I go blank when I talk to her...I mean...it's fine when I'm with her...we can talk till there is no end...but when I'm away...I have the darnest thing to talk about. Do help on what to do now.

will keep you updated

welfareloser · 09-06-2001, 07:36 AM

never underestimate the value of a handwritten letter. once a week, on real stationary. i'm serious. i know you'll never do it, but that's a mistake!!! it really DOES mean more than a phone call or an email.

Kim · 09-06-2001, 07:52 AM

I agree with welfareloser...send her a real letter. So much nicer than just email.

Cheesypuff · 09-06-2001, 01:45 PM

Thanks so much ladies! You girls are great...What would I do without my got|apex ladies! I'll be sure to keep ya'll updated on how we are doing. Thanks again.

Apex · 09-06-2001, 03:35 PM

Heh, sounds like my wife and I. She moved to the East Coast 2 weeks after we got together, and ended up staying out there for over a year (was an indefinite period of time at the time she left).

revil · 09-06-2001, 10:52 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by welfareloser
never underestimate the value of a handwritten letter. once a week, on real stationary. i'm serious. i know you'll never do it, but that's a mistake!!! it really DOES mean more than a phone call or an email.

Why does it mean more then a phone call or email?

Cheesypuff · 09-06-2001, 10:55 PM

I guess what welfare is saying...is that everything is electronics...and something that is personal means more. Like something hand written.

chrissy · 09-06-2001, 11:01 PM

Most def.

You can sit and pick out a e card or write a email. But a hand written letter shows you put time into it. Your writing lets your feelings show.

If you are upset, your writing tends to be ridged or tight
If you are relaxed and at ease, your writing is the same.

Cheesypuff · 09-07-2001, 12:03 AM

Thanks for all the advise...I really do feel like G|A is a community

jujubees · 09-07-2001, 01:11 AM

Another option is to find a poem or a song and write it out for her on nice stationery. The poem/song should convey what you're feeling and say something positive about your relationship, the sappier the better.

(hint to refer to "Songs that make you cry" thread)

revil · 09-07-2001, 02:12 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by jujubees
Another option is to find a poem or a song and write it out for her on nice stationery. The poem/song should convey what you're feeling and say something positive about your relationship, the sappier the better.

So something by Marilyn Manson or Rob Zombie would be good, Yes?

Cheesypuff · 09-07-2001, 03:03 PM

Good call revil. I think I should go with blink 182 or slimshady. I really like that...Have you ever thought of going into being a shrink

Jihforce · 09-07-2001, 05:02 PM

Also, if you get the chance, try sending her a small little gift out of the blue. Nothing fancy or expensive. Just give her things that trigger memories of the two of you together.
Maybe send a CD mix of songs you and your girl used to listen together? And if you can, tape a little voice message and sent it to her (should help with the phone bills)
You don't need a special occasion to tell her that you care, so just do it.

coleslaw · 09-08-2001, 07:40 PM

Oh, and when you do send a letter, be sure to spray it with some of your cologne. That always gets 'em!

My Hugo cologne is very potent. It has been known to linger on clothes and other things for several days to weeks at a time.

chrissy · 09-08-2001, 07:45 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by coleslaw
Oh, and when you do send a letter, be sure to spray it with some of your cologne. That always gets 'em!

My Hugo cologne is very potent. It has been known to linger on clothes and other things for several days to weeks at a time.

my brother in law wears his cologne like that too. When he first puts it on, no one can breath in the room.

But the idea is good if you always wear it. Smell can be very ... sensual when it comes to memories. Just don't overpower the postman.

Cheesypuff · 09-14-2001, 08:01 PM

Well guys...here is a update...I just broke it off with my girlfriend. I guess it didn't work out for me. I still really like her a lot, but it was just too hard for me to be seperated for that long. Thanks for all the advice you peeps have been giving me...hopefully I'll still be in close contact with her. I really love her a lot, and hopefully nothing will change between us. Tell me what I should do now. I'm kinda depressed.

Kim · 09-16-2001, 08:36 AM

I'm so sorry.

Jihforce · 09-17-2001, 02:12 PM

Go bowling with a bunch of close friends. Keep yourself active and outside the house. It should keep your spirits up.

revil · 09-17-2001, 03:34 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Cheesypuff
Tell me what I should do now. I'm kinda depressed.

Masturbate... A lot. I do it all the time... maybe that's why i don't have a girlfriend...
...ok, you probably didn't want to know that.

but seriously, just go out and do something to get her off your mind. so do things with your friends, like jihforce said.

09-05-2001, 10:59 PM	#1
Cheesypuff Vice Admiral Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Cali, but missing Hong Kong and Texas Posts: 4,782	Guy with Girl problems Hey I wanted to write here because you girls are in here and you ladies are got\|apex girls, so I feel like you girls can help me...Like a typical guy I don't know what to do in a long distance relationship...I sometimes feel like I don't know my girlfriend like I should...and that leads to not communicating as well as if we were together. What do you ladies think? __________________ Life is like toilet paper, long and useful! The stars at night, are big and bright clap 4x deep in the heart of TEXAS!

09-05-2001, 11:30 PM	#2
Jenny Chief of Naval Operations Join Date: Mar 2000 Location: Kansas City area Posts: 10,947	Well, my biggest piece of advice is: KEEP TALKING! Don't assume that the girl doesn't want to hear from you or whatever. Doesn't matter if you think she's busy or isn't itching to hear from you. Trust me. If she loves you (or cares about you a lot), she will ALWAYS be glad to get an email or e-card from you. Sit down at the end of the day and email her. Whether it be one sentance of "I was thinking about you today and it made me smile." or a long email about how your day went...it doesn't matter. Maybe once a week (or more if she is the type like I am), send her an ecard. Don't always make them sappy. Just hello, how are you, glad we are friends, I miss you, I love you, whatever. A good place to get them is American Greetings . One question you have to ask yourself is: "How do I feel about her? Do I love her enough to want to put in the extra effort this will take?" If the answer is no, then break it off. That is the best thing you could do for both of you. If the answer is yes, then give it your best! Good luck and keep us updated! Jenny __________________ Check out my spoilers for over 20 shows @ SpoilerFix.com Check out my TV blog, where I post weekly & daily TV schedules, TV news, interviews with TV stars & more! All new TV forums as well @ TV Is My Pacifier

09-06-2001, 07:36 AM	#4
welfareloser Grand Moff Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: jabba's palace. (yes, i do... and no, you can't.) Posts: 9,718	never underestimate the value of a handwritten letter. once a week, on real stationary. i'm serious. i know you'll never do it, but that's a mistake!!! it really DOES mean more than a phone call or an email. __________________ Find the person who will love you because of your differences and not in spite of them and you have found a lover for life. ~ Leo Buscaglia http://www.welfareloser.com http://gotapexblogs.net/users/welfareloser/

09-06-2001, 07:52 AM	#5
Kim Eternally Ensign Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Utah Posts: 4,573	I agree with welfareloser...send her a real letter. So much nicer than just email. __________________ Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, you'll be a mile from them, and you'll have their shoes. --Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

09-07-2001, 01:11 AM	#12
jujubees Rear Admiral Lower Half Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Californication Posts: 2,060	Another option is to find a poem or a song and write it out for her on nice stationery. The poem/song should convey what you're feeling and say something positive about your relationship, the sappier the better. (hint to refer to "Songs that make you cry" thread) __________________ You could have it all My empire of dirt

09-06-2001, 02:00 AM	#3
Cheesypuff Vice Admiral Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Cali, but missing Hong Kong and Texas Posts: 4,782	Thanks Jenny, I'll try to talk to her more...but the only thing is...is that I really don't know what to say. I've known this girl for about 7 years and I moved to Cali about 3 years ago...and we got together this summer when I visited. I love her so much...but I go blank when I talk to her...I mean...it's fine when I'm with her...we can talk till there is no end...but when I'm away...I have the darnest thing to talk about. Do help on what to do now. will keep you updated

09-06-2001, 01:45 PM	#6
Cheesypuff Vice Admiral Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Cali, but missing Hong Kong and Texas Posts: 4,782	Thanks so much ladies! You girls are great...What would I do without my got\|apex ladies! I'll be sure to keep ya'll updated on how we are doing. Thanks again.

09-06-2001, 03:35 PM	#7
Apex Can you hear me now? Join Date: Dec 1999 Location: Here Posts: 5,506	Heh, sounds like my wife and I. She moved to the East Coast 2 weeks after we got together, and ended up staying out there for over a year (was an indefinite period of time at the time she left).

09-06-2001, 10:55 PM	#9
Cheesypuff Vice Admiral Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Cali, but missing Hong Kong and Texas Posts: 4,782	I guess what welfare is saying...is that everything is electronics...and something that is personal means more. Like something hand written.

09-06-2001, 11:01 PM	#10
chrissy Admiral Join Date: May 2000 Location: OKC Posts: 5,046	Most def. You can sit and pick out a e card or write a email. But a hand written letter shows you put time into it. Your writing lets your feelings show. If you are upset, your writing tends to be ridged or tight If you are relaxed and at ease, your writing is the same.

09-07-2001, 12:03 AM	#11
Cheesypuff Vice Admiral Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Cali, but missing Hong Kong and Texas Posts: 4,782	Thanks for all the advise...I really do feel like G\|A is a community

09-07-2001, 03:03 PM	#14
Cheesypuff Vice Admiral Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Cali, but missing Hong Kong and Texas Posts: 4,782	Good call revil. I think I should go with blink 182 or slimshady. I really like that...Have you ever thought of going into being a shrink

09-07-2001, 05:02 PM	#15
Jihforce Vice Admiral Join Date: Jan 2000 Posts: 4,352	Also, if you get the chance, try sending her a small little gift out of the blue. Nothing fancy or expensive. Just give her things that trigger memories of the two of you together. Maybe send a CD mix of songs you and your girl used to listen together? And if you can, tape a little voice message and sent it to her (should help with the phone bills) You don't need a special occasion to tell her that you care, so just do it. __________________ Auto Leasing Info @ RIDEwithG.com \| My Food & Travel Blog

09-08-2001, 07:40 PM	#16
coleslaw Arrrhh! Join Date: May 2000 Location: LI NY Posts: 6,807	Oh, and when you do send a letter, be sure to spray it with some of your cologne. That always gets 'em! My Hugo cologne is very potent. It has been known to linger on clothes and other things for several days to weeks at a time. __________________ A priest, a paladin and Varimathras walk into a bar...

09-14-2001, 08:01 PM	#18
Cheesypuff Vice Admiral Join Date: Dec 2000 Location: Cali, but missing Hong Kong and Texas Posts: 4,782	Well guys...here is a update...I just broke it off with my girlfriend. I guess it didn't work out for me. I still really like her a lot, but it was just too hard for me to be seperated for that long. Thanks for all the advice you peeps have been giving me...hopefully I'll still be in close contact with her. I really love her a lot, and hopefully nothing will change between us. Tell me what I should do now. I'm kinda depressed.

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09-16-2001, 08:36 AM	#19
Kim Eternally Ensign Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Utah Posts: 4,573	I'm so sorry.

09-17-2001, 02:12 PM	#20
Jihforce Vice Admiral Join Date: Jan 2000 Posts: 4,352	Go bowling with a bunch of close friends. Keep yourself active and outside the house. It should keep your spirits up.

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