Female tactics

djnick702 · 03-04-2003, 11:43 PM

Is it fair for ur BF or GF to use your past against you? What if you've changed since then? My chick uses the past on me all the time. what can I do? Do all females think this is right? Help........get me out of this one please. Men can't win

NuTs62 · 03-05-2003, 01:27 AM

whats in the past should stay in the past.. but the past usually sets precedence for what to expect in the future.. if you don't want the past to be brought into the relationship, you should make it clear how you feel..

but by the same token.. when someone that has been convicted of some crimes.. lets say hypothetically murder.. when he's released, are we to assume that he's a new person?

i've always taken a liking to this phrase "actions speak louder than words"... show her that you've changed, that you're a different person now.. (but u've always gotta involve some words.. communication is important)..

good luck

Jihforce · 03-05-2003, 08:11 AM

in a perfect world, the past SHOULD stay in the past. But we're human, we make mistakes, and when it comes to feelings of the heart, its kind of hard to just leave it in the past.
when my wife does that, i just tell her "if i am like that, then why are you with me now?"

mcs328 · 03-05-2003, 05:04 PM

HALLEJEAH!!! People change and if they recognize their past deeds and endeavor to change and do then you should be free from guilt. I mean I'm sure some of you have done drugs or something. AND some of you same ppl will never touch the stuff again. So should u be flogged for that one slip up or experimentation for the rest of your life? It's a lessoned learned.

If you could go back in time, could you change it or would you? Past is past. Talk it out and then take time to get over it or live with it.

Your chickie is not the only one. What's important is the person you are now and the person you want to be. If she keeps it up, then like I say all the time...people who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. Don't you have any info on her past? You can fight fire with fire can't you. Only do it though if it's vicious tho...otherwise be the better person and take the higher ground. Don't get dragged into a playground fight. Leave the high school BS and be an adult. I'm sure you got more problems like work, school, parents etc than worrying about something you can't possibly change ever in a million years or with a million dollars. Remember if she brings it up and you don't, then she's living in the past and not you.

Good advice jihforce.

djnick702 · 03-05-2003, 08:29 PM

Some women will be women. I don't like fighting so i just let her talk. After she's done then and only then do I let her out of the handcuffs.

modena · 03-06-2003, 01:38 AM

Memo · 03-06-2003, 09:26 AM

Tell her the past is what makes you the way you are now. If she doesnt' like the way you are then she shouldn't be with you. It's simple as that.

molecularfire · 03-09-2003, 01:38 PM

I actually don't think of the past as something that should be ignored. If you did something bad in the past and it's germaine to whatever argument you're currently having with your GF/BF then I don't see why the past shouldn't be brought up. The question is whether it's brought up because those actions still bother your SO (which makes it a legitimate reason IMO) or whether it's brought up just to win a fight (a non-legitimate reason). If someone did something bad in the past, they should have to redeem themselves. Those who don't remember their history will be doomed to repeat it.

djnick702 · 03-18-2003, 05:32 PM

Why is it that women always tell half of the story to their friends? They never tell how they started the argument, only what the guy did or his response to what caused the argument.

CornMonkey · 03-18-2003, 11:46 PM

don't let the past dictate who you are, but rather let it be a part of who are to become.

molecularfire · 03-19-2003, 08:17 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by djnick702
Why is it that women always tell half of the story to their friends? They never tell how they started the argument, only what the guy did or his response to what caused the argument.

Eh... we do the same thing.

djnick702 · 03-19-2003, 02:15 PM

Women like to repeat things in front of their friends or other people in order to trick u into jumping back into the argument that has passed. Do not fall for this devious trick. They bring it up in the hopes that u will try to defend urself becuz u know they are only telling half the story, the part that makes u look guilty. By this time, half of the evidence in ur brain has dissappeared and ur words will not come out so smooth in front of the new jury....so just take the fifth and keep ur mouth shut. Women make the best lawyers. Most women hold PhD's in arguing and making men look bad. I'm sure of this.

03-04-2003, 11:43 PM	#1
djnick702 Ensign Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Vegas Posts: 31	Female tactics Is it fair for ur BF or GF to use your past against you? What if you've changed since then? My chick uses the past on me all the time. what can I do? Do all females think this is right? Help........get me out of this one please. Men can't win

03-05-2003, 08:11 AM	#3
Jihforce Vice Admiral Join Date: Jan 2000 Posts: 4,352	in a perfect world, the past SHOULD stay in the past. But we're human, we make mistakes, and when it comes to feelings of the heart, its kind of hard to just leave it in the past. when my wife does that, i just tell her "if i am like that, then why are you with me now?" __________________ Auto Leasing Info @ RIDEwithG.com \| My Food & Travel Blog

03-05-2003, 05:04 PM	#4
mcs328 Admiral Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Maryland Posts: 6,578	HALLEJEAH!!! People change and if they recognize their past deeds and endeavor to change and do then you should be free from guilt. I mean I'm sure some of you have done drugs or something. AND some of you same ppl will never touch the stuff again. So should u be flogged for that one slip up or experimentation for the rest of your life? It's a lessoned learned. If you could go back in time, could you change it or would you? Past is past. Talk it out and then take time to get over it or live with it. Your chickie is not the only one. What's important is the person you are now and the person you want to be. If she keeps it up, then like I say all the time...people who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. Don't you have any info on her past? You can fight fire with fire can't you. Only do it though if it's vicious tho...otherwise be the better person and take the higher ground. Don't get dragged into a playground fight. Leave the high school BS and be an adult. I'm sure you got more problems like work, school, parents etc than worrying about something you can't possibly change ever in a million years or with a million dollars. Remember if she brings it up and you don't, then she's living in the past and not you. Good advice jihforce. __________________

03-06-2003, 01:38 AM	#6
modena Captain Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: pa Posts: 1,741	__________________ WoW - Perenolde - chars: intron, modena Computer - AMD 64 3700+ 939 on NF4 SLi mobo (ZALMAN CNPS 9500), 2 GB DDR466 (2-3-2-5), XFX Geforce 7900GT 256mb (520mhz core, 24 pipes, 1500mhz memory), Western Digital Raptor 74GB Serial ATA HD 10k, 850GB in other HD's, 21in Widescreen LCD

03-18-2003, 05:32 PM	#9
djnick702 Ensign Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Vegas Posts: 31	he said, she said Why is it that women always tell half of the story to their friends? They never tell how they started the argument, only what the guy did or his response to what caused the argument.

03-05-2003, 01:27 AM	#2
NuTs62 Vice Admiral Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: San Francisco Posts: 4,763	whats in the past should stay in the past.. but the past usually sets precedence for what to expect in the future.. if you don't want the past to be brought into the relationship, you should make it clear how you feel.. but by the same token.. when someone that has been convicted of some crimes.. lets say hypothetically murder.. when he's released, are we to assume that he's a new person? i've always taken a liking to this phrase "actions speak louder than words"... show her that you've changed, that you're a different person now.. (but u've always gotta involve some words.. communication is important).. good luck

03-05-2003, 08:29 PM	#5
djnick702 Ensign Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Vegas Posts: 31	Some women will be women. I don't like fighting so i just let her talk. After she's done then and only then do I let her out of the handcuffs.

03-06-2003, 09:26 AM	#7
Memo Admiral Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: East Village Posts: 5,659	Tell her the past is what makes you the way you are now. If she doesnt' like the way you are then she shouldn't be with you. It's simple as that.

03-09-2003, 01:38 PM	#8
molecularfire Admiral Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Walking through a lemon grove looking for one good orange Posts: 6,134	I actually don't think of the past as something that should be ignored. If you did something bad in the past and it's germaine to whatever argument you're currently having with your GF/BF then I don't see why the past shouldn't be brought up. The question is whether it's brought up because those actions still bother your SO (which makes it a legitimate reason IMO) or whether it's brought up just to win a fight (a non-legitimate reason). If someone did something bad in the past, they should have to redeem themselves. Those who don't remember their history will be doomed to repeat it.

03-18-2003, 11:46 PM	#10
CornMonkey Rear Admiral Lower Half Join Date: May 2000 Location: in front of my computer Posts: 2,503	don't let the past dictate who you are, but rather let it be a part of who are to become.

03-19-2003, 02:15 PM	#12
djnick702 Ensign Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Vegas Posts: 31	Women like to repeat things in front of their friends or other people in order to trick u into jumping back into the argument that has passed. Do not fall for this devious trick. They bring it up in the hopes that u will try to defend urself becuz u know they are only telling half the story, the part that makes u look guilty. By this time, half of the evidence in ur brain has dissappeared and ur words will not come out so smooth in front of the new jury....so just take the fifth and keep ur mouth shut. Women make the best lawyers. Most women hold PhD's in arguing and making men look bad. I'm sure of this.

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