ialsohaveadream

So I was reading Savage Love this week (and I warn you, if you're overly sensitive to profanity or talk about premarital sex, dont' click the link), and it's all things that women wish they knew when they were 15. Along the same lines, if you could go back, Marty McFly style, and tell yourself a few quick tidbits about love and sex, what would you say?

My conversation with myself would include the following:
1. Yes, go with your gut and pass on the first girl that offered. It'll help you land the second one...and she's way better anyway.
2. Women are insane. In their twenties, they'll be able to hide it for a few months, but as teenagers they haven't developed this skill, and their insanity will break through within the first few weeks.
3. Just because a girl wants to have sex with you, she's not a slut.
4. If you're ever offered casual sex with a friend, consider this: Yes, it may make for an awkward friendship, but after a few years, you'll realize that you're not friends with her anymore AND you didn't have sex with her. That's gonna suck.
5. When your friend dates a woman that is absolutely terrible for him, and she's wrecking his life, it's your duty to openly hate her, and point out how evil she is.
6. If she mentions how badly she wants a purse that costs more than $40, just move on.

__________________
Web log

Showtime

Cut off that damn Mullet is what I would have told my 15 year old self if I had a mullet.

What?

-j

__________________
NBA REPORT 10-11/ The 3-Peat!


1948 1949 1950 1952 1953 1954 1972 1980 1982 1985 1987 1988 2000 2001 2002 2009 2010 Reigning NBA CHAMPS!

Yossarian

don't date that one, and start basketball earlier...

__________________
"So cheers all and remember, don't mistake my old age for maturity. Just because I grow old does not mean I grow up. " -Merlin

"Now that your limelight has been sufficently trashed I will leave"- Nija

Each religion has got their own way of making you feel like a victim. The Christians say 'you are a sinner', and you better just zip up your trousers and give the money to the pope and we'll give you a room up in the hotel in the sky.
~Timothy Leary

frenchbread

Stop staring at Sourdough that way!

mcs328

take weightlifting class and drop one of the non-atheltic after school classes.

__________________

welfareloser

"okay... see that guy over there? the hot junior who parks his vw rabbit three cars down? your friend matt's best friend? might as well start f***ing him now, since you're going to wind up married to him with three of his kids. as a bonus, it'll save you a crazy hs boyfriend and a sh**ty marriage, and it'll save him a crazy hs girlfriend and an ueber-crazy fiancee."

oh, and:

"no... do NOT get that perm."

__________________
Find the person who will love you because of your differences and not in spite of them and you have found a lover for life. ~ Leo Buscaglia
http://www.welfareloser.com
http://gotapexblogs.net/users/welfareloser/

hoey222

major in computer science

buy stock in intel and microsoft

__________________
i have become comfortably numb......

gear02

Don't get into a habit of buying stuff, figure out a way to mitigate it in the future.

Don't be so shy in asking girls out...because that'll carry on for the next 10 years

Try out for sports (football). Yeah, you might not know a thing about playing, but high school football lets everyone play. Don't be shy!

College will work out

Gothic Girl

Drugs lead to bad things.

chrissy

keep your legs crossed.

It's okay to be a nerd.

Stay in school -- don't drop out of college.

doolittle

at 15 no one could tell me anything, i had it all figured out. damn i was stupid, but i sure had some fun.

angl2b

work harder in school - that guy you end up living with? Make him pay for everything - don't waste your money - invest your money in CD's then buy a property - wait a few years and go hunt down a guy name mcs328 on G|A - he would like you more when you are rich, and educated, knock him out and fly to vegas - get married earlier - otherwise you'd be too old. oh yeah and don't eat so much - you'll get fat.

__________________
Love is something that is not expected but given freely-when received it touches you in a way it makes you cry...

WhiskeyPapa

I actually used to daydream about this. There was so much I would have warned myself about. Now that I'm pushing 40, I realize that everything that has happened in my life, for better or worse, has brought me to the place I am right now.

Honestly, if I could go back in time right now and see my 15 year old self, I wouldn't change a thing. I'd say "Hey bud, everything's going to turn out alright."

__________________

cadetevon

When you graduate and join the Army, keep in touch with your boyfriend. He's gonna be hot and rich and famous.

He'll no longer be just your boyfriend, he'l be THE Lincoln Kennedy.

*le sigh*

But more than that, don't marry that guy you meet on your first day in Germany. Just f*** him 'cause he's got a hot body and let him leave for state side without you. He's a loser.

Oh yeah, invest in Microsoft.

__________________
Yvonne
Funny: My Next Wife.

welfareloser

the wise man speaketh

(and in all seriousness, prm and i have discussed what woulda happened had we hooked up 10 years sooner... and we both know darn well the answer was "f*** it all up to the point of irreperable damage." we had some sh** to go through to come out more mature and laidback on the other side.)

TofuNinja

"Don't date that one girl..... and go to your prom, avoid that other girl and maybe get with that one girl.........

but if you don't do what I tell you..... everything turns out alright anyways......so just live life"

__________________
"To search for the old is to understand the new." -Gichin Funakoshi-

===>>>LABELED CANTACUZENE'S DUMBEST PERSON ALIVE!!!<<<===

zenbooty

Beat the **** out of that f***er. Don't take that ****.

Quit playing computer games and get a job and buy a car and get out of the house. Spend some of that game time learning more real computer stuff. Success won't come so easy later.

Study your chess openings, and work on your pool game. There's money to be made on the streets and in the frat bars of the city you're about to go to school at.

__________________
Common sense is what tells you the Earth is flat.

whitak24

you mean like lincoln kennedy the nfl player?

crazy!

Kim

I would tell myself to be nicer to my mom, because I would miss her when she was gone.

__________________
Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, you'll be a mile from them, and you'll have their shoes.
--Jack Handey Deep Thoughts

DarkFury

Spend more time and talk with your Dad more.... because your time is short.

And...whatever you do, don't move to Indiana.

__________________


DarkFury's Pimptopia - Don't Hate the Playa, Hate the Game!
Home of the Original OG Pimp (accept NO imitations)

GracieBayb

don't study so hard and be more friendly

PiPhiAngel

don't study for the SATs. that 1420 will land you at UCI.
don't major in computer science- you'll regret it.
be more friendly.
geeky people are waaay cool.

ialsohaveadream

While I can understand how some of the advice you're giving yourself would inadvertently affect your love/sex life (invest in Microsoft, study, stand up for yourself), I was wondering what you guys would say to yourself just on those topics.

cheapie

don't start looking at porn

__________________
70% of the world is covered by water. The rest is covered by Bob Sanders

molecularfire

Oh... actually one thing though... you see that cute girl who is always with that other guy... he's her brother not her bf. She is single. Go hit on her.

__________________
Disclaimer - The above opinion should not be taken as medical advise. My only advise is to talk to your doctor. If you are stupid enough to take anything I say seriously, you have nobody to blame for your cranio-anal inversion but your stupid self.

I may not be smart enough to do everything but I am dumb enough to try anything. - Beastboy.

InfiniteNothing

I'd give myself stock tips and tell myself to buy a condo after I graduated HS.

__________________
As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals.

chrissy

1. you are way to young to be having sex. period.
2. I know there isn't anything you can do about it now except keep your legs crossed.
3. NONE of the boys/men in this town are worth sleeping with.
4. If you don't listen to me now, in 3 years your dream will never come true.
5. When you meet the guy who loves the dragon necklace you are wearing, hold on to him and don't listen to the jealous boy you have had a crush on (who has the same name as him) since 7th grade.

Airencracken

just end it now, it really doesn't get much better.

__________________
"I remember my first orgasm, I just wish someone was there to share it with me..."11-05-2003 05:33 AM - Topane
They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin
Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, & the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opiate of the masses. - Karl Marx
Hell is other people - Jean-Paul Sartre

speedracer120

Nice one airen.

Honestly I would tell myself to stop being so damn angry all the time. Actually do the damn homework assignments and maybe even study, then I'll actually do something with my life. If that fell into play, I think I actually might be doing something with my life right now, other than sleeping and eating.

__________________
Off in La La Land

revil

you can always start somewhere