08-16-2005, 08:41 PM
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#1 |
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Banned
 Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 3
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GUYS: Do you REALLY mind if the woman
makes the first move? I was just wondering and I'm not talking about for sex or a meaningless fling. I'm saying if you're friends/acquaintances with the guy you recently met, and you can tell he's attracted to you and you'd like to pursue a real relationship. I've always heard the man would MUCH rather make the first move otherwise "he's just not that into you"--like the book says--but I was just wondering what you all think?
Does the woman come across as desperate if she expresses a genuine interest first. In my experience, I've noticed that when the girl treats the guy like **** (pays him no mind), they can't seem to get enough of her, but if she makes a fuss over him: poof!!... He's gone!! I've started treating the ones I'm kinda into like the guys I'm not interested in (guy friends). There are so many studies and books out there on the subject, but I wanna hear it from the horses mouth ya'll!! What do you guys think about the woman showing interest first? Does it scare you away? FashionPrincess http://www.geocities.com/dana_alias/...hung_over.html |
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08-16-2005, 09:13 PM
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#2 |
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What's Da Pho*?
  
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: SoCal (714)
Posts: 13,296
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Nope I don't mind at all.
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08-16-2005, 09:21 PM
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#3 |
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Vice Admiral
 
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: In the kitchen...skinning onions...
Posts: 4,946
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I don't think most men mind it. Some may see it as desperate...but some really are too afraid to make the first move.
If the guy hasn't ALREADY made the first move...then I would say go for it.
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08-16-2005, 09:38 PM
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#4 |
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Secretary of the Navy
 
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: Chillin' N Da 'Hood
Posts: 34,997
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Nope... that just tells me that she knows what she wants.
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 DarkFury's Pimptopia - Don't Hate the Playa, Hate the Game! Home of the Original OG Pimp (accept NO imitations) 
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08-16-2005, 09:44 PM
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#5 |
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Fleet Admiral
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: FL
Posts: 8,077
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I'm not totally against it, but I do prefer to make the first move myself. I'd prefer the girl just gave me some kind of "green light" hint....like when you laugh at something I say, then you lean in and do the little "push" move on the bicep, but you're really just wanting to touch my arm. (And by the way, if you do that move on a guy, and his arm instinctively flexes, you're golden)
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08-16-2005, 10:04 PM
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#6 | |
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100% Pure Evil
Join Date: Sep 2000
Posts: 7,861
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Quote:
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08-16-2005, 10:31 PM
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#7 | |
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Fleet Admiral
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: FL
Posts: 8,077
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Quote:
Maybe that's why they put me on the sex offender list.... |
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08-16-2005, 10:31 PM
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#8 |
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Chief of Naval Operations
Join Date: May 2000
Location: LEVITTOWN< PA> USA
Posts: 13,621
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It never bothers me. Some women give so many mixed signals, so this settles it for me.
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“Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery.” (Winston Churchill) |
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08-17-2005, 12:24 AM
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#9 |
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Chief of Naval Operations
Join Date: May 2001
Location: City of The Dead
Posts: 13,552
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I prefer women to make the first move. Otherwise, they get to go through the 'Awkward Flirting But Not Really Unless You Want It To Be Flirting' stage.
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08-17-2005, 02:24 AM
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#10 |
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Admiral
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Boca Raton, FL: By way of: Poway, CA; Gainesville, Fl; Penn Valley, Pa.
Posts: 5,680
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It sounds like you are descriping 2 separate and distinct situations. In the first one, you are already friends and want to take it to the next level. In the second, there is no pre-existing relationship, just passing acquaintances.
In the first situation, no matter who makes the move their is an inherent danger of forever changing the friendship. Unless its a drunken moment where you both give into your desires, unless one of you says something its not going to happen. In that instance, the old adage that men have no female friends, just women they want to fvck but havent, comes to mind. While I dont think that statement is actually true, it does highlight the fact that most guys wont have a problem going from just friends to either a friends with benefits situation OR a relationship. The only question is IF they want a relationship. Unlike many females, most guys wont get upset over someone expressing her interest. HOWEVER - IF he says hes not interested, dont keep pressing it as that will push him away. In the second situation, acquaintances, unless he is old fashioned or really insecure it shouldnt bother him either. Some guys will actually be impressed by your upfront nature. I will say that some guys may view it as if you are aggressive in asking, you are probably going to be aggressive when it comes to sex. While this may not be the case, if that is his assumption he may think that you slowing down later is a sign of a cold fish, prude, or misleading him.
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Welcome my son, welcome to the machine...Where have you been? It's alright we know where you've been.... |
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08-17-2005, 05:41 AM
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#11 |
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Admiral
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Square On My Arse
Posts: 7,410
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Life is short. If you like the guy then go for it.
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08-17-2005, 07:11 AM
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#12 |
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Admiral
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: Maryland
Posts: 6,578
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Hell yeah I like the girl to make the fist move....unless your fugly. Then...uhmm...I'll make the first move...as soon as I...umm....get some milk from the grocery store. Be riiiiiiight back.
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08-17-2005, 07:43 AM
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#13 | |
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Admiral
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: New Orleans
Posts: 5,054
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Quote:
 Seriously, I don't mind if a girl asks me out. |
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08-17-2005, 09:13 AM
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#14 |
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Vice Admiral
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 4,338
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I don't care if a girl makes the first move.. I've had relationships that went with me starting or them starting.. It doesn't matter.. Guys and Girls are Equal these days ya know..
Pretty soon.. It will be ok for Girls to propose to guys.
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08-17-2005, 09:34 AM
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#15 | |
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Admiral
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: Maryland
Posts: 6,578
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Quote:
Oh damn these typos...I meant first not fist. In no way do I want to be fisted or fist anyone. Not that kinky.  lol |
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08-17-2005, 10:24 AM
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#16 | ||
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Secretary of the Navy
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: Chillin' N Da 'Hood
Posts: 34,997
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Quote:
 Bwaaa haa haa haa....   Quote:
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08-17-2005, 03:38 PM
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#17 |
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Captain
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: San Diego
Posts: 1,812
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I like it when a girl makes the first move!
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08-17-2005, 04:40 PM
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#18 |
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Captain
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Beaverton, OR
Posts: 1,529
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Show up at his door naked.
Oh, btw, he moved to Oregon. PM me for the address.
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-The nerd formerly known as vectorcalculus |
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08-17-2005, 04:50 PM
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#19 |
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Lieutenant Commander
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Orange County
Posts: 818
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i sorta made the first move with michael, although, i pretty much already knew he was going to ask me out because everytime he saw me his face was tomato red... i just kinda got sick of waiting for him to come around
 i have to say, making the first move is among one of the best decisions i have made in my entire lifeLast edited by GracieBayb : 08-17-2005 at 04:53 PM. |
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08-18-2005, 12:32 AM
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#20 |
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Ensign
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 22
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i would say it doesn't matter to me. i don't think i have ever thought about it. i would just go with the moment. your first instinct is usually the correct one.
besides i don't think gender has anything to do with it. to split hairs over this is not really a gender issue as it is a control issue. |
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08-18-2005, 12:50 AM
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#21 | |
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Lieutenant Junior Grade
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: San Diego, California
Posts: 171
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Quote:
Congratulations!! It's not so tough to make the first move once you realize guys really do like it. |
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08-18-2005, 01:12 PM
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#22 |
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Admiral
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: California
Posts: 6,681
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nope that's how i got my woman.
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"I remember my first orgasm, I just wish someone was there to share it with me..."11-05-2003 05:33 AM - Topane They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, & the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opiate of the masses. - Karl Marx Hell is other people - Jean-Paul Sartre 
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08-18-2005, 03:30 PM
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#23 |
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Vice Admiral
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: In the kitchen...skinning onions...
Posts: 4,946
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Did fitfatale ever come back to get her answer?
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08-18-2005, 04:49 PM
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#24 |
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Rear Admiral Upper Half
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: the peanut gallery
Posts: 3,909
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i've had good results when the girl makes the first move.
however, when I make the first move, I get nothing but bad results. go figure. 
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08-20-2005, 12:45 AM
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#25 |
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hot in velour pants
Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: New York City
Posts: 9,198
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nope
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____________________ IF A FAT GIRL FALLS IN THE WOODS DO THE TREES LAUGH? |
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08-20-2005, 11:10 AM
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#26 |
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Admiral
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Walking through a lemon grove looking for one good orange
Posts: 6,134
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I have more respect for a woman who makes the first move. Personally, I think too many women are lazy in waiting for the guy to make the first move.
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Disclaimer - The above opinion should not be taken as medical advise. My only advise is to talk to your doctor. If you are stupid enough to take anything I say seriously, you have nobody to blame for your cranio-anal inversion but your stupid self. I may not be smart enough to do everything but I am dumb enough to try anything. - Beastboy. |
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08-20-2005, 11:25 AM
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#27 | |
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Admiral
Join Date: Apr 2000
Location: Temple City, CA
Posts: 5,140
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Quote:
 i have no qualms whatsoever if a woman makes the first move of any sort. for shy guys like myself, i feel very much on the spot when i make a move. so if the woman does it, then i know that she knows what it's like for me. it makes everything easier afterwards. |
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08-31-2005, 11:21 PM
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#28 |
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Lieutenant Junior Grade
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 51
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not a big deal, i'm usually oblivious
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