Life sucks

**welfareloser** · 06-26-2006, 05:31 PM

Originally Posted by navyones

I would've stayed in Michigan, if I could've afforded it. As I said, my wife has taken over $3500 now. That is money that was going to be used to get a house or an apartment.

go into stupid debt if you have to, but really, unless we're talking royal oak or ann arbor, you can afford to live in michigan if you can afford to live anywhere. work at mcdonalds while applying for better jobs, and get a 2-bedroom apartment with three bunkbeds in the kids' room. i cannot stress the importance of you being there and demanding to see your kids enough. use it or lose it. you asking for visitation when you haven't seen them for a year isn't going to get any sympathy, whether you claim it wasn't your fault or not. a judge isn't going to see where you've made any effort, and frankly, i see very little effort myself. i'm sorry if that sounds harsh, but that's how it's going to go down, and i'm trying to provide the kick in the pants to scare you into tackling this problem. you are going to lose your kids if you continue down your current path. either accept that now or do something about it, NOW. you don't have any other chocies.

Originally Posted by navyones

The lawyers I have spoken to agreed that not being around her is probably the best plan.

you don't have to be around her to be around your kids. you can make that happen if you want to.

you need to start demanding, through lawyers, that your wife get back on her meds and stay under a psychiatrists regular care, FOR THE GOOD OF YOUR CHILDREN. make it clear that your relationship was good until she went off her meds, and that reconciliation is impossible so long as she is off them. (even if you have given up on the idea of reconciliation and don't even want to try any more, it would be viewed sympathetically by a judge if you seemed open to it, absent her unmedicated mental disorder.)

Originally Posted by navyones

My wife and I were only married for six years. My understanding is that she won't be able to touch my military retirement. This is especially true, because my ex-wife already gets half. My ex and I were married for 11 years.

i'm sure this varies by state, but unless it can be proven that she gave up substantial educational or career opportunities for the sake of your career, then assets that are yours from work should be fairly safe.

**navyones** · 08-19-2006, 06:55 PM

Well, just an update. A new life wasn't too difficult to find. I hooked up with my best friend. I have known her for years. We have been together for a couple months now. She is beautiful...she is intelligent. Anyway, we are together now.

My original plan was not to date for a year, but she sort of threw me a curve ball.

**BigJon** · 08-19-2006, 07:52 PM

Glad to hear things are working out.

**dogopoly** · 08-19-2006, 07:58 PM

Agreed...sounds like you left behind a mess that you didn't create.

**avlena** · 08-20-2006, 10:27 AM

congrats on finding someone else, particularly someone who you obviously already have a connection with.

is there any update to the situation with your kids? hopefully your new life includes them?