17 WAYS HOW YOU CAN TELL IT'S GOING TO BE A ROTTEN DAY
1 - You wake up Face Down on the Footpath.
2 - You put your bra on backwards, and it fits better.
3 - You call Suicide Prevention and they put you on hold.
4 - You see a `60 minutes' team waiting in your office.
5 - Your Birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.
6 - You want to put on the clothes you wore home from the party, and
there aren't any.
7 - You put on the news and they are showing emergency routes out of
8 - Your twin sister forgot your birthday.
9 - Your car horn goes off accidentally and remains stuck as you
follow a group of `Hell's Angels' down the freeway.
10- The boss tells you not to bother taking your coat off.
11- The bird singing outside your window is a Vulture.
12- You walk to work and then find your dress is stuck in the back
of your pantyhose. (Even Worse for Ladies)
13- You call your answering service and they tell you that its none
of your business.
14- Your blind date turns out to be your wife.
15- Your income tax cheque bounces.
16- You put both contact lenses in the same eye.
17- Your wife say's "Good morning, Bill" and your name is Fred.