my dad is weird/dumb

**sho.gun** · 12-11-2002, 06:31 PM

Setting: I was on the computer browsing forums, time was 5:40 PM.

Dad: (walks into my room) Hey, help me put up christmas lights.
Me: Uh... it's already dark outside, why don't you do it on Sunday?
Dad: Thanks. (walks out of room)

So like 15 minutes later I hear the cling-clanging of the ladder and I thought to myself "Damn, he's actually doing it!". So being the nice and wonderful son that I am, I walked out to the garage where he already aligned all the lights and said to me "Bring that ladder outside." I was going to try to reason with him that it's already dark outside and it was frickin' cold but he wasn't going to have any of it.

So yeah, there I was... putting up christmas lights and shivering. The good people of Moorpark walked their dogs on the sidewalk and drove their cars past us, I felt like such an idiot

BAH!!

**TofuNinja** · 12-11-2002, 06:34 PM

But you were a good son

**tweeteresa** · 12-11-2002, 06:37 PM

sho.gun: i just got the sudden urge to hug my computer for warmth.

LOL.

that's the funniest thing i've heard in so long!!! hahahaha. anyhow...i hope u're warm now. and yes...dads are stubborn. they're a pain in the a$$ at times but we still love em.

*hug* there u go....feel better.

**ZrEo0** · 12-11-2002, 06:58 PM

the only christmas lights i put up was on the christmas tree planted on my front lawn

**mink** · 12-11-2002, 08:40 PM

I'm a dad... enough said.

Sometime we have bad days that demand us to be weird, which makes us normal. <-- figure that out.

Saw this guy driving around town on a lawnmower. Guess his car was broke or something. If that was your dad, you would trully be cursed. Be thankful, it was just lights.

**sho.gun** · 12-11-2002, 08:58 PM

Originally posted by mink
I'm a dad... enough said.

Sometime we have bad days that demand us to be weird, which makes us normal. <-- figure that out.

Saw this guy driving around town on a lawnmower. Guess his car was broke or something. If that was your dad, you would trully be cursed. Be thankful, it was just lights.

lol i saw your sig... "ANUS" Motherboard?

**hapoo** · 12-11-2002, 10:12 PM

ohh come on now, it wasn't that cold!
It was dark but not that cold.
(I was there at 6:30)

**sho.gun** · 12-11-2002, 11:07 PM

Originally posted by hapoo
ohh come on now, it wasn't that cold!
It was dark but not that cold.
(I was there at 6:30)

Ark... it was cold! I was wearing a T-shirt and my Pajama pants and the light breeze killed me. Wait, you were there?

**eSDee** · 12-11-2002, 11:09 PM

Hmmm that gives me an idea. Maybe we should start a picture thread showcasing Christmas lights. Anyone interested?

**ZrEo0** · 12-11-2002, 11:11 PM

Originally posted by eSDeeLoco
Hmmm that gives me an idea. Maybe we should start a picture thread showcasing Christmas lights. Anyone interested?

and the winner (Apex being the judge) gets a free G|A tee

all i have is my tree in the front lawn

**sho.gun** · 12-11-2002, 11:17 PM

effort-wise, I am clearly the winner of this T-Shirt.

**ZrEo0** · 12-11-2002, 11:19 PM

to win, you had to put up the lights or did most of the work

**sbp** · 12-11-2002, 11:34 PM

Originally posted by sho.gun
the story

Yep, been there, done that. Whenever my mom wants something done it has to be done right then. Geez, I thought patience was learned as people got older.

**hapoo** · 12-12-2002, 12:41 AM

Originally posted by sho.gun

Ark... it was cold! I was wearing a T-shirt and my Pajama pants and the light breeze killed me. Wait, you were there?

Yeah, i was in moorpark at the time.

**revil** · 12-12-2002, 12:41 AM

Originally posted by sbp
Yep, been there, done that. Whenever my mom wants something done it has to be done right then. Geez, I thought patience was learned as people got older.

oh man. I know what you mean. christmas eve, my mom was throwing a little party around 5 pm. she wakes me up at 9 o' f*cking clock in the morning to help her do three things. it went like this:

9:00 - it all starts
revil's evil mother: "I want to clean the the bathroom, the kitchen floor, and (something else just as stupid)."
me: "ok, it just needs to be done a little before 5, right?"
revil's evil mother: "ya"
me: (goes back to bed)
revil's evil mother: "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! YOU'LL NEVER FINISH BY 5!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH" (starts to cry because her son doesn't love her nor care about her stuff, etc. etc.)
me: (pulls blanket over head)
revil's evil mother: "GET UP!"
me: (snore)
revil's evil mother: (puts vacuum outside of the door, turns it on, and leaves)
me: (unplugs vacuum, takes it in to his room, disassembles. shorts the wire, reassembles and puts back outside door.)
revil's evil mother: (plugs in vacuum causing the breaker to trip, causing her to panic thinking the house broke and her party is ruined)
revil's evil mother: (asks revil's kind father how to fix it)

10:00 - Power is back
me: (ZZZZZzzzzz)
revil's evil mother: (plugs the vacuum in again)
revil's evil mother: "AAAAAAHHHHH! WHAT'S GOING ON?!"
me: hehe... (ZZZZZzzzzz)
revil's evil mother: (flips breaker, then plugs the vacuum back in... finally gets a clue...)
revil's evil mother: "You are buying me a new vacuum you ungrateful son!"
me: "write it down before you forget." (turns over... ZZZZZzzzzzz)
revil's evil mother: (walks away crying)
me: (ZZZZZZzzzzz)

12:00 - evil awakens
me: "yawn"
me: (cleans bathroom. almost completely clean to start with. I had just cleaned it 2 days before)
me: (cleans kitchen floor)
me: (reattaches the wires in the vacuum and vacuums the adjoining room to the kitchen)
me: (does other asinine thing)
me: (finds shopping list on the counter)

12:30 - evil goes shopping
me: (buys all the stuff on the shopping list.)
me: (found time management book, bought that as well.)
me: (goes home, puts groceries away.)
me: (sits down on couch, watches tv.)

1:30 - vindication
revil's evil mother: "why are you watching tv?! Do the things I asked you too! You better have them done by the time i get back from the store!"
revil's evil mother: (shuffles around looking for the list)
revil's evil mother: "did you see my shopping list?"
me: "ya."
revil's evil mother: "where is it?"
me: "I threw it away."
revil's evil mother: "WHY?! I needed that!"
me: "I know."
revil's evil mother: (grumbles while writing another list.)
me: "oh, by the way, while shopping, I found a book for you. it's at the end of the counter"
revil's evil mother: "shopping?"
me: "that's why i threw the list away. it's all in the fridge. I did that after i did the things you asked."
revil's evil mother: "oh...."
revil's evil mother: (not quite sure what to say... walks away)

GRRRRR. that still makes me mad. she still hasn't apologized for acting so crazy! but on the plus side, she no longer gets on my back about that sort of thing.

crap. this is like the longest thread I ever wrote.... except for that one i did about winamp.

**mojo** · 12-12-2002, 12:54 AM

Originally posted by sho.gun

Ark... it was cold! I was wearing a T-shirt and my Pajama pants and the light breeze killed me. Wait, you were there?

so lemme get this straight: you hung lights outside in your pj's in the cold, and your dad's the one that's dumb

**Jeffbx** · 12-12-2002, 05:54 AM

I don't know what it is about christmas lights, but it's always the coldest day of the year when I finally manage to get outside... it was about 6 friggin degrees & dark out last week when I was out there like an idiot hanging lights...

**ribitch** · 12-12-2002, 06:08 AM

when i have a child, one year i want to sit him down and watch christmas vacation with him. Afterwards, i want to tell him we will deck our house out in lights like they do in the movie, and actually DO it. I think it would be so much fun. Just for 1 year though, i dont want to be known as teh tacky people in the neighborhood all the time

**welfareloser** · 12-12-2002, 06:33 AM

revil's story is the best...

we weren't going to do any christmas decorations since we're going to be in our hometown for 7 days around christmas, sitting under all the parents/grandparents/great-grandparents trees. but eg is so impressed with christmas decorations that we dug out some lights from the garage... i had dozens and dozens of $5 and $10 unstackable amazon gc's two years ago, i don't remember from where, so i stocked up on anything that was $7 and under, making it free with shipping... so in addition to toys and kitchen junk, i got some icicle lights that were on sale.... so we threw those around on the three bushes and one little spruce out front, and eg just loves it. in fact, we took him out for a drive to look at other people's lights and he just about shtt his pants... "wow! look at all the christmas! look, there's the green christmas! and the red christmas! and the snowmen! oh, no, the reindeer with the lights! oh wow! look, it's santa clause! and there's santa clause! lots of santa clause oh WOOOOWWWWWW!" half-hour monologue.

now, speaking of lights, here's my pet peeve: PEOPLE WHO JUST THROW THE DAMNED LIGHTS LIKE SO MUCH TOILET PAPER INTO THE LIMBS OF THEIR TREES WITH NO REGARD FOR HOW STUPID ITS GOING TO LOOK WHEN LIT. nothing is uglier than random loops of light. we call it christmas puke. an evergreen should be wrapped in a tight spiral to give an overall effect, so that the lines disappear. a deciduous tree should have the bare branches wrapped so that you get a nice outline of a tree instead of some hideous striped blob. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!?!?!?!

**chadlnc** · 12-12-2002, 08:18 AM

Originally posted by welfareloser
now, speaking of lights, here's my pet peeve: PEOPLE WHO JUST THROW THE DAMNED LIGHTS LIKE SO MUCH TOILET PAPER INTO THE LIMBS OF THEIR TREES WITH NO REGARD FOR HOW STUPID ITS GOING TO LOOK WHEN LIT. nothing is uglier than random loops of light. we call it christmas puke. an evergreen should be wrapped in a tight spiral to give an overall effect, so that the lines disappear. a deciduous tree should have the bare branches wrapped so that you get a nice outline of a tree instead of some hideous striped blob. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!?!?!?!

I know what you mean, it really gets me when people string lights on their bushes and instead of using an entire strand they run it to the next bush. So when you look at it there are lights hanging in mid-air running from one bush to the next. Or when someone just lays one strand of lights across the tops of their bushes.

**Tommy Boomfiger** · 12-12-2002, 08:20 AM

cold at 5:40pm in SOCAL!!! come to chicago buddy, ill show you what cold is

**eSDee** · 12-12-2002, 08:27 AM

Originally posted by mojo
so lemme get this straight: you hung lights outside in your pj's in the cold, and your dad's the one that's dumb

Things that make you go hmm

**whitak24** · 12-12-2002, 08:43 AM

Originally posted by revil

revil's story

dude, that was hilarious! your mom is crazy.

last year, my mom started bawling by her bed on christmas morning because i didn't take a shower

this was after i was home for thanksgiving and she told me how i was an oppressor of the poor at my job.

then she wonders why i come home as rarely as possible

**Nija** · 12-12-2002, 09:41 AM

I put up the lights around our apt. under the conditions that they will stay up for a while, so we don't have to use actual lamps

then i sat down and let her decorate in Xmas stuff. then PG deicded that we needed a tree. I looked at the presents on the dinner table, looked at the fake ficus tree wrapped in white lights, and put the presents around them.

viola! Xmas tree year round

she actually didn't complain about any of it either.. now... as long as she doesn't put anything holiday-ee on my desk, we are cool.

**Grimm** · 12-12-2002, 09:55 AM

Originally posted by eSDeeLoco
Hmmm that gives me an idea. Maybe we should start a picture thread showcasing Christmas lights. Anyone interested?

Hell no! Look out folks he's got a ringer. There is one street in Escondido that is entirely decked out in lights, it is a small side street with less than 20 homes, but it is a solid wall of colored lights and decorations. The Disneyland Light Parrade is dull by comparison.

**Jeffbx** · 12-12-2002, 01:18 PM

Originally posted by eSDeeLoco
Hmmm that gives me an idea. Maybe we should start a picture thread showcasing Christmas lights. Anyone interested?

Maybe the WORST displays? Anyone live next door to the Griswalds?