Friends with Benefits

[gwilks98]

I've got the sixth sense tingling. Bad news feels like it's on the horizon...

I'm involved in a friends with benefits relationship, though neither one of us will openly admit it. We haven't slept together, but it's plenty serious to be considered more than friends. Well, she is starting to put out the girlfriend vibe and is showing signs of attachment. (Ok ok, so am I.) neither one of us want to be involved long term with the other right now. What's even scarier is I think a few more girls down the line want the same. (No, they don't know each other, so there's no way they know what's going on.)

I have a feeling I'm going to have to make a decision here soon and I'm not sure what to do.

Has anyone ever been in a FwB relationship? How did it turn out?

[nickel]

still benefitting

but i thought a friend with benefits meant you were sleeping together

[Nija]

Originally posted by nickelback
still benefitting

but i thought a friend with benefits meant you were sleeping together

it does... he has 'friends with occasional perks' going on

[look_ma]

lol. Just whip it out one night and either she will go for it or all the benifits will go away. Either way you will get what you want.

[DankNstickY]

Originally posted by look_ma
lol. Just whip it out one night and either she will go for it or all the benifits will go away.

i'll try that sometime


my FwB "relationships" have just gotten boring. maybe cus i was in it just for the fun and wasn't really interested in theh girls. so i just stopped talking to them after a while.

[mcs328]

Originally posted by Yossarian

no, we are

Ah your response threw me off. So Yoss is and Gwilks isn't. Gotcha. So you can have more than one friend with benefits right. So enjoy them. Hopefully all of them. Together. In the same room. At the same time. All females. And you. With a video camera. Streamed live online into a G|A video chat room.

[look_ma]

But seriously, my entire friend's with benefits relationships seem to fail for me because the girls always get too attached. (And no I am not afraid of commitment, just the FWB are NOT long-term relationship material. I am seriously looking for a good girl.

[mcs328]

I understand the whole friends with benefits concept. My question is how did I miss this whole dynamic?!? How does one start an arrangement like this? I never had one or been approached for one or asked for one so I find it strange how easy it seems to create one. Maintaining one however is another story.

[look_ma]

My favorite start-up of a friend with benefit relationship is inviting the girl back to my place to watch a movie. Then I stick a chick flick movie in, and when the water works start you cuddle her. Then when the romantic part of the movie comes up, you start kissing (the girl). The rest just gradually progresses from there.

(edited just for you revil)

[revil]

Originally posted by look_ma
Then when the romantic part of the movie comes up, you start kissing.

I don't get it. what do you start to kiss? The tv screen?

[molecularfire]

Uh... gwilks... hate to break this to you, but you're in the exact opposite of a ftf. From the sounds of it, you're doing the BF stuff but you aren't getting any. I highly suggest you reconsider your strategy...

[mcs328]

Originally posted by molecularfire
Uh... gwilks... hate to break this to you, but you're in the exact opposite of a ftf. From the sounds of it, you're doing the BF stuff but you aren't getting any. I highly suggest you reconsider your strategy...

I'm with you...you're playing the ball and chain game. Switch tactics. You're not supposed to form any attatchment...well except for maybe half a foot but YMMV

[chrissy]

First off, you aren't in a FwB if you haven't slept together. Second, if you want to be, there is a couple different ways to do it; each depends on the girl.

First, flat out ask. "have you ever had a benefit type relation?" talk about it. Pick up her vibes. This would have worked on me but I was married at the time. Damn... But it was great talking "shop" with him. (nothing nija type, just past FwB experiences)

Second, you know she is the type, she is making the moves, go for it. Just remember, it cannot be someone that you know has feelings for you, that makes you a jerk.

[molecularfire]

Also, it cannot be with someone you have feelings for. That would make you an idiot.

[Aardvar11]

sorry, but in my expierence sooner or later that whole FwB thingy will turn into a gf/bf thing... damnit

[gwilks98]

Just to clarify...there can be and ARE benefits with this girl. We're just not giving each other the full package. (Excuse the pun.)

[Momma Kitty]

Origionally posted by look_ma

But seriously, my entire friend's with benefits relationships seem to fail for me because the girls always get too attached. (And no I am not afraid of commitment, just the FWB are NOT long-term relationship material. I am seriously looking for a good girl.

I'm not sure how you expect to find a "good girl" by finding girls who would agree to a FwB relationship. Wouldn't it be easier if you only had snuggle buddies so you could keep yourself open for that "good girl"?

Just a thought...

[Booyamos]

I have had a few FwB lately. First one we both just wanted to hook up and no relationships so it worked out well until I moved on to other women, but it was a good situation cause she moved on as well. Another girl we dated then broke up and just continued the benefts part.

From my experience FwB can be good at first, but eventually one person starts to have feelings or wants more than the other and then it gets complicated. I have had other situations where it did not end so well and they just think you were using them for sex.. which I guess technically you are but they are using you too.

So just be honest about it