The Naughty Files

**The Happy Squirrel** · 11-07-2003, 09:53 PM

hmmm maybe we should also call this the...
"I know this guy/girl who one time....."

this is a thread dedicated to the strange things that have come up in "intimate situations" that you people might be willing to share.

come on.....really.... this could get entertaining
<IS = "intimate situation">

I have an okay story.

one time during an IS I kept leaning over to the side and looking behind my gf, after about five times doing this she turned around to see what i was looking at and realized I was trying to see the football game. needless to say she got fairly angry with me. but come on. it was playoffs!

anybody else got a good one???

**cheapie** · 11-07-2003, 10:34 PM

wonder how long this thread is going to last before getting the old thread lock...

**DankNstickY** · 11-07-2003, 11:06 PM

i dont think it'll get locked if people dont go all into detail

**cheapchinese** · 11-08-2003, 04:21 AM

one day in October.. my gf kept on calling me, for days... asking me.. do you know what we're going to do friday? i was like ...we can do anything? she got mad...i was like wt..???? okay...couple of hours later ...same question...next morning same... eventually it was friday.. she called ...and asked.. what special arrangement would we be doing today.....i was.. like HUH??? whats going on?

well long story short... that was the 3 yr anniversay of the day we met, (how would anybody remember that????)

**donnar** · 11-08-2003, 07:38 PM

this just happend to me the other day,

Dh had come home from being gone for over a month, so we are in the shower just washing and doing IS things, when he bumps me from behind I fall over and I am leaning half way out of the shower and half way in with a hurt knee, I can barley get up while he is just showering away needless to say we did not finish the IS later

Donna

**rajatQ2** · 11-08-2003, 09:57 PM

story from the dorm days.
i was dating this girl who lived in a girls only dorm. I wasn't even allowed to sleep over there, or walk around w/o an escort, but did some times anyway.
So, the night after final exams in fall ended, everyone had gone home except for us, we stayed for some peace and quiet, we thought we could get away with an "is" in the showers. The doors are that semi-see through plastic, where you can only make out outlines.

Well, the resident director of the dorm shows up at exactly the heat of the moment. I'm jsut looking through the door and all i see is a big shadow with arms crossed and an angry voice. Next is me, sopping wet in her office, wearing nothing but a wet pair of soccer shorts and my girlfriend's night shirt.

Another time, this is a painful one boys, i'd just rubbed my girlfriend's back with icy hot after a long day of playing foot ball outside, and after that it starts getting kinda frisky. before I'd put a tiny dot of icy hot on her nipple and she got mad. all of a sudden she goes, "How does this feel?" and takes a huge lump of icy hot and rubs it on my two little guys. ahhh .... mis huevos ! That is not something you ever forgive. and any of you sadists and masochists out there, NEVER do that to ANYONE!!! Soap and water don't help at all!

**cheapchinese** · 11-09-2003, 01:59 AM

ouch

**Burzhui** · 11-09-2003, 08:03 AM

YOu should ask Lolita about all the stupid things that i've done

**PCC** · 11-09-2003, 09:17 AM

When my son was two, he walked in on us as we were in the process of making him a little brother or sister. I had locked the door but it did not latch. The little guy was shocked, he kept telling us to put our clothes on. He was traumatised for a day but has recovered since. Nowadays, my wife won't let my daughter sleep in her own bed because she moves around a lot in bed at night and she's scared my daughter will fall off the bed and hurt herself. Needless to say, with all the commotion going on beside her, she wakes up from time to time but she doesn't freak out, she just goes back to sleep.

**blueindian** · 11-09-2003, 09:21 AM

Originally posted by PCC
When my son was two, he walked in on us as we were in the process of making him a little brother or sister. I had locked the door but it did not latch. The little guy was shocked, he kept telling us to put our clothes on. He was traumatised for a day but has recovered since. Nowadays, my wife won't let my daughter sleep in her own bed because she moves around a lot in bed at night and she's scared my daughter will fall off the bed and hurt herself. Needless to say, with all the commotion going on beside her, she wakes up from time to time but she doesn't freak out, she just goes back to sleep.

dude...you have sex with your wife while a child is in the bed? i'm not so sure that's a good idea.

**Burzhui** · 11-09-2003, 09:26 AM

Originally posted by blueindian

dude...you have sex with your wife while a child is in the bed? i'm not so sure that's a good idea.

i've heard many stories when that happens, it's a pretty common thing when the people live in a 1 room appartment, but the bed thing i heard very often

**PCC** · 11-09-2003, 01:36 PM

Originally posted by blueindian

dude...you have sex with your wife while a child is in the bed? i'm not so sure that's a good idea.

I've been trying for three years to get my daughter out of my bed but my wife keeps carrying her back into our bed. Now she won't sleep anywhere else.

**blueindian** · 11-09-2003, 02:01 PM

Originally posted by PCC
I've been trying for three years to get my daughter out of my bed but my wife keeps carrying her back into our bed. Now she won't sleep anywhere else.

how old is your daughter?

**donnar** · 11-09-2003, 08:16 PM

My son is going to be 3 in December and he still sleeps in the bed with hubby and I he falls asleep in his bed and then in the middle of night he crawls into ours

Donna

**cheapie** · 11-09-2003, 08:19 PM

not to stray from the cool stories but....our kid is a little over 2. the only way he gets to sleep in our bed is if there's a bad thunderstorm.

i've heard to many horror stories about parents with a full bed of kids trying to get a full night of sleep.

**blueindian** · 11-09-2003, 08:35 PM

sleeping in the bed with parents is one thing.

sleeping in bed with parents while they are having sex is another issue alltogether. i'm no psychologist, but i think that has the possibility of leading to some issues later in life. a 2 or 3 year old child is old enough to remember things, and one of thoese memories should not be his/her parents getting wild in the same bed.

like a friend said tonight at dinner when we were discussing this, "i walked in on my parents having sex when i was 15 and it scarred me for life, i can't imagine growing up with it".

just my 2 cents.

**cheapie** · 11-09-2003, 08:46 PM

Originally posted by blueindian
sleeping in the bed with parents is one thing.

sleeping in bed with parents while they are having sex is another issue alltogether. i'm no psychologist, but i think that has the possibility of leading to some issues later in life. a 2 or 3 year old child is old enough to remember things, and one of thoese memories should not be his/her parents getting wild in the same bed.

like a friend said tonight at dinner when we were discussing this, "i walked in on my parents having sex when i was 15 and it scarred me for life, i can't imagine growing up with it".

just my 2 cents.

what??? you're supposed to be a pinko-liberal-commie-vegetarian that has no problem w/anything like this.

**PCC** · 11-10-2003, 06:20 PM

Originally posted by blueindian

how old is your daughter?

She just turned three.

**blueindian** · 11-11-2003, 11:40 AM

Originally posted by PCC
She just turned three.

yeah...i think that's too old to be sleeping with your parents while they are having sex.

anyone else? am i crazy or what? i mean, i can remember stuff from when i was 3 and i'm certainly glad one of those memories is not my parents having sex.

**donnar** · 11-11-2003, 02:52 PM

I wouldn't let my children at 3 be in the room while we were having sex

**Booyamos** · 11-13-2003, 09:25 AM

lol walking in on parents...

when I was about 3ish i think I walked in on my parents.. or what I thought was my parents. Now that my parents are divorced and my mom and i are close i found out it was my BABYSITTER and my MOM!!!

**zenbooty** · 11-13-2003, 10:34 AM

Originally posted by Kacarp
lol walking in on parents...

when I was about 3ish i think I walked in on my parents.. or what I thought was my parents. Now that my parents are divorced and my mom and i are close i found out it was my BABYSITTER and my MOM!!!

Dude I got a woody now. Thanks.

**RoniMan** · 11-14-2003, 12:00 AM

Originally posted by zenbooty
Dude I got a woody now. Thanks.

**coleslaw** · 11-14-2003, 08:34 AM

Originally posted by Kacarp
i found out it was my BABYSITTER and my MOM!!!

So your mom is a closet lesbian? Nice...

**nickel** · 11-14-2003, 08:43 AM

not enough "naughty" in this thread

i was on a date in a no-need-to-mention city and we were having drinks in a quaint hotel bar. the bartender was a great guy, easy to talk to, and we hung out for awhile just listening to his stories. we ended up staying longer then planned and the drinks just kept going down easy. finally, we decided to go downtown and hit a few other places. just beyond the bar in the hall were the restrooms. so i went to use the ladies room and had my date wait outside for me. then i had a frisky idea and i peaked out the door and motioned for him to join me. he did and then we did.
afterwards he left first when the coast was clear and happened to glance back at the bar on his way. standing behind it was the bartender we befriended and he gave him a big thumbsup.

**RoniMan** · 11-14-2003, 09:47 AM

Originally posted by nickelback
not enough "naughty" in this thread

i was on a date in a no-need-to-mention city and we were having drinks in a quaint hotel bar. the bartender was a great guy, easy to talk to, and we hung out for awhile just listening to his stories. we ended up staying longer then planned and the drinks just kept going down easy. finally, we decided to go downtown and hit a few other places. just beyond the bar in the hall were the restrooms. so i went to use the ladies room and had my date wait outside for me. then i had a frisky idea and i peaked out the door and motioned for him to join me. he did and then we did.
afterwards he left first when the coast was clear and happened to glance back at the bar on his way. standing behind it was the bartender we befriended and he gave him a big thumbsup.

so...when you coming to LA?

**Booyamos** · 11-15-2003, 11:12 AM

Originally posted by coleslaw

So your mom is a closet lesbian? Nice...

you people are dumb, there are male babysitters too

**RoniMan** · 11-15-2003, 11:08 PM

Originally posted by Kacarp

you people are dumb, there are male babysitters too

yes, that's true, but the story is MUCH more interesting with a female babysitter.

**cheapie** · 11-15-2003, 11:25 PM

Originally posted by RoniMan

yes, that's true, but the story is MUCH more interesting with a female babysitter.

no crap. what kind of fantasy involves a male babysitter?

**The Happy Squirrel** · 11-16-2003, 10:07 PM

one time I was in a car in a IS and very much naked parked at a camp gournds and in the heat of the moment when through the fogged windows all of a sudden i see flashing red and blue lights. then a flashlight peering through the windows. "can you please step out of the vechile" is what i hear. so out i go with just a baseball hat covering the neccesary areas.
Cop: How are you this evening?
me: Oh. Im pretty good. And you?
Cop: Just fine. What are you folks doing out here?
Me. Ummm. Just hanging out. Watching the lake. Looking at the stars.
Cop: Are you aware that to be out here past 10p, you do need a camping permit. Do you have one?
Me: No, Im sorry, I was not aware of that, I dont have a permit.
Cop: Yes it is a designated campgrounds and we must enforce this. You understand.
Me: Of course.
<long awkward scilence>
Me: Sooooo.....
Cop: WEll okay then, Im going to have to ask you folks to go ahead nad clear out of here now.
Me: Okay, have a good day.
Cop: Well, it wont be as good as yours but ill try. Bye

and he walked away, we hurriedly got dressed and went home. o well
i was thinking i was going to get a number of tickets for a bunch of reason but i guess i got lucky.

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