How do you feel about saving yourself for marriage/your lifemate?

[Bires]

Yup, it's the spin off thread. These are YOUR opinions on your experiences, not anyone else. I'll try and include some gray area because I know no issue is black and white.

Me...I am SO glad I waited. A few times I almost didn't make it, but boy, am I glad I did.

I know exactly what blows my wife's mind. Best of all, she knows I've never compared her to another woman, and I know I have her entire attention. Despite what Hollywood would try to convince us, sex is AWESOME with a single mate.

Oh yeah...no rubber involved or needed!

[InfiniteNothing]

Wait wait wait. Does this have anything to do with the thread at hand. Are you trying to prove a point or is this just a masterbatory act?


Oh and to answer the question I'm damn happy I didn't wait to get on the love boat. I can't imagine missing out on all these years of great sex. It's awsome knowing what else is out there and never having any doubts about what I'm missing; learning things I could never learn with just one woman. And hey, no rubber needed (now).

[DankNstickY]

um... sex is fun whenever. yay.

[kimchicowboy]

i'm waiting. hopefully no more than 5 years. hehehehe. just got to find the girl first.

[molecularfire]

Not so much saving myself for marriage as for when I am ready to have children.

[Nanotech9]

23... going on 24... getting damn impatient. probably not gonna make it to 24.

[Bires]

Wait wait wait. Does this have anything to do with the thread at hand. Are you trying to prove a point or is this just a masterbatory act?

Still making friends, eh IN?

Man...


Did I poop on your thread?

Why are you so bitter against those that would encourage morality and cleaner living?

[Jenny]

I wish I'd waited, yup.

[WhiskeyPapa]

24 is nothin'. I have a friend who just got married at 38 years old. Yes, he waited. And it's not like he's ugly or anything, either.

Oh yeah...no rubber involved or needed!

Keep thinking like that and you'll end up just like me. Call me later and I'll hook you up with one of those 15 passenger vans.

[oblongmelon]

24 is nothin'. I have a friend who just got married at 38 years old. Yes, he waited. And it's not like he's ugly or anything, either.
Keep thinking like that and you'll end up just like me. Call me later and I'll hook you up with one of those 15 passenger vans.

LOL do you hold a van franchise now? how many kids its it? 7 right? I THINK THATS GREAT~! keep going..nothing like big family...I wish I had more than 4....

[WhiskeyPapa]

We had 7 when I started posting here, but that was four years ago. We're expecting number 10 in October.

[blueindian]

i think it's fine if that's what you want to do and if you don't want to wait that's fine too.

i didn't wait really, but my wife was the first person i had sex with. that was back in high school when we dated (sorry 'bout that swampfox, i know you told me not to but... ). we didn't get married for 12 more years and both dated other people during that time.

i guess i can still lecture my kids though and tell them they should wait until they are with the person they are going to marry before they have sex

[usedillusion]

All the guys "saving" themselves, outta will and not force, should be posted on Got Deals

We all need a deal every now and then, but it doesn't mean we need to spend on the cheapest or most available item up for grabs. I think quality matters, not quantity, but don't necessarily believe there is only one quality man on the planet. Oh and somwhere in this post via backward masking, you will find a direct answer to the question.

[Nija]

I believe life should be like an orgy....

[InfiniteNothing]

Still making friends, eh IN?

Man...


Did I poop on your thread?

Why are you so bitter against those that would encourage morality and cleaner living?

Well, not crazy about you using my words. I thought it was more like a counter tread but that it wasn't a logical counterargument. And well that last one is complex and personal.

[zenbooty]

Why are you so bitter against those that would encourage morality and cleaner living?

You really set yourself up here when you provoke others with statements like this. What's makes saving yourself any more moral or clean than not saving yourself? What makes you think you are any more moral than IN, or myself?

[Bires]

You really set yourself up here when you provoke others with statements like this. What's makes saving yourself any more moral or clean than not saving yourself? What makes you think you are any more moral than IN, or myself?

Not me, per se...but reactions to many of the Off Topic forum posts of late.

Oh...and although I wasn't arguing that I was more moral than anyone else, I won't apologize for living in an obedient manner that brings honor to my family and God.

[InfiniteNothing]

Thanks Zen, I didn't even notice that he implied that having sex before 18 was immoral and therefore I must be less moral than him. I fell into that pointed question like a fool.

Bires, as for friends: in general I figure the middle path between being a slave towards pleasing everyone and being selfish and pissing off everyone is if 1/3 the people like me, 1/3 the people don't, 1/3 can't make up their minds, and the last 2/3s don't talk to eachother

[zenbooty]

and although I wasn't arguing that I was more moral than anyone else, I won't apologize for living in an obedient manner that brings honor to my family and God.

Oh, but you are. You may have not literally said, "I am a more moral person than you," but you definitely stated that saving oneself is a morally superior position to not saving yourself. Or at least, you certainly draw the correlation between celibacy and morality. From there it can be logically inferred that you believe someone who remains celibate until marriage is morally superior to someone who is not, all other things being equal. And I think that's just a bunch of voodoo mumbo jumbo nonsense.

[BrewMaster]

i think in the general understanding of morality, saving yourself is more moral.

the real question is whether you give a sh!t about that moral position. morals mean nothing in this world so I wouldn't get all bent outta shape because someone is calling you immoral. i see no reference to "morals" in the Bible.

so Bires, were you jerking off when you were an unmarried man? how moral was/is that?

[topane]

I was too young my first time but I can't say I regretted it. I had some longer relationships and sex was just icing on a very good cake. As long as you treat your partner with respect and understand the possible consequences of your actions, there is nothing wrong with pre-marital sex.

I don't feel it's necessary to save yourself for marriage, but if that's what you want to do, I won't condemn you for it.

[InfiniteNothing]

i think in the general understanding of morality, saving yourself is more moral.

the real question is whether you give a sh!t about that moral position. morals mean nothing in this world so I wouldn't get all bent outta shape because someone is calling you immoral. i see no reference to "morals" in the Bible.

so Bires, were you jerking off when you were an unmarried man? how moral was/is that?

mo·ral·i·ty ( P ) Pronunciation Key (m-rl-t, mô-)
n. pl. mo·ral·i·ties

1. The quality of being in accord with standards of right or good conduct.
2. A system of ideas of right and wrong conduct: religious morality; Christian morality.
3. Virtuous conduct.
4. A rule or lesson in moral conduct.

Sorry Brew, I don't see any "saving yourself for marriage" in there.

[Booyamos]

Hmmm lets see... if i waited until i got married that would be in like 4 years at the earliest so 5 more years estimate. soo i woulda had 10 years of sex then marriage, or (23+5) 28 years of no sex...

choices choices... seems easy to me. Plus i am not religious so i don't really have to worry about that aspect of it.

[Bires]

...were you jerking off when you were an unmarried man? how moral was/is that?

Masturbation in and of itself is not immoral. It tends to lead to thoughts or actions that are immoral, but the action itself is not.

But, again, my point had nothing to do with relative morality (with respect to others), it had everything to do with how you feel now concerning what you did/are going to do with your virginity.

Most of you know my bias: In addition to education, I'm also a student of Judeo-Christian (Western) theology.

The bible calls virginity a treasure and a gift. I am thrilled that I got to give that gift to a single person, and she returns her thanks for my commitment everytime we make love. Without it, sex is just physical-I wanted something much much more, and I got it by waiting until I was married to my lifemate.

Despite what IN and ZB have claimed, I don't condemn you for having sex before marriage or sex with multiple partners. You're missing out on a lifetime of incredible emotional and spiritual experiences, but it's your choice.

[zenbooty]

Masturbation in and of itself is not immoral. It tends to lead to thoughts or actions that are immoral, but the action itself is not.

What kind of immoral thoughts or actions? Enjoyment of it?

But, again, my point had nothing to do with relative morality (with respect to others), it had everything to do with how you feel now concerning what you did/are going to do with your virginity.

VIRGINITY

The bible calls virginity a treasure and a gift. I am thrilled that I got to give that gift to a single person, and she returns her thanks for my commitment everytime we make love. Without it, sex is just physical-I wanted something much much more, and I got it by waiting until I was married to my lifemate.

Sex doesn't have to be just physical just because you didn't wait to have it with your wife. What would you know about how premarital sex feels, anyway? You've never had it!

Despite what IN and ZB have claimed, I don't condemn you for having sex before marriage or sex with multiple partners.

He just thinks that your engaging in immoral activities, that's all

(You really shouldn't bait me by name like that, Bires. I was willing to leave you alone on this, but now that you've entered my "grill" space, I gotta do what I gotta do.)

You're missing out on a lifetime of incredible emotional and spiritual experiences, but it's your choice.

Hogwash. Losing your virginity does not forever damn you to a life of emotionless and spiritless sex. On this point, all I gotta tell everyone is this: He has no basis upon which to compare premarital relations with anything, since he has not experienced anything of the sort. Ignorance is bliss

[ialsohaveadream]

Say what you want about waiting, but those I know that have done it ended up cheating on their spouse, because they were so incredibly curious about what else was out there. I'm content with the fact that I've had enough experience with other women to realize that mine is #1....in all respects.

And now that I wrote that, I'm gonna print it and show it to her....and then get laid.

[Nija]

And now that I wrote that, I'm gonna print it and show it to her....and then get laid.

Your not the only one

[InfiniteNothing]

Masturbation in and of itself is not immoral. It tends to lead to thoughts or actions that are immoral, but the action itself is not.

So masturbation is fine as long as you have a lobotomy soon after? What's your point?

But, again, my point had nothing to do with relative morality (with respect to others), it had everything to do with how you feel now concerning what you did/are going to do with your virginity.

I don't know how you get that from this

Originally Posted by Bires
Why are you so bitter against those that would encourage morality and cleaner living?

Just say you're sorry and we'll all have a nice day on this one.

[LPMiller]

Despite what IN and ZB have claimed, I don't condemn you for having sex before marriage or sex with multiple partners. You're missing out on a lifetime of incredible emotional and spiritual experiences, but it's your choice.

Ok, this confuses me. Neither my wife nor I waited, I'm not even sure that would have been possible, we were rabbitsl. But the point is, I fail to see what I've missed here after 10 years of marriage to a women I've been with for 21 years.

[Bires]

Research shows us that when highly emotionally intense episodes are experienced, chemicals are released into our brain that burn images and feelings into our long term memory.

Do you remember:
your first kiss?
an auto accident?
a near-death (or near-miss) experiences?
your first sex?

Here's what's really scary: if you were not your mate's first sexual partner, when you do have sex, her brain can't help but dredge up memories of her first time.

Do you want to be compared to someone else? Do you (or will you) enjoy comparing your mate to your first sexual partner?